A Dead Man Is Walking
by thoughtseeker
Summary: Naruto realizes who he was in a past life and gains the ability that kept him living kinda for many years, Naruto was...Kenny. Appearances by many south park characters partial inspiration by the fun with weapons episode.
1. Chapter 1

**DEAD MAN STILL WALKS**

**Disclaimer: I don't own south park or Naruto**

**Kenny McCormick was a poor little boy that would die on a daily basis but some how always awoke alive the next day. For many years this curse plagued Kenny until he was freed from it with a tragic non-comical death. With his curse lifted he was able to move on when he died. Unfortunately when he was reincarnated he still carried the curse but he didn't die, yet the first time he did his old life was returned. Now he seeks out his friends in this strange new world.**

**CHAPTER 1: Didn't I just die?**

Naruto Uzumaki a fifteen year old genin, held back three times in the ninja academy had taken his first step into being taken seriously, he had been entered into the chunin exams. Unfortunately during the second exam him and his team where attacked by some snake freak that knocked him out. When he came too he felt different, like he was another person before he was himself, if that made any sense at all. But Naruto was face with a different dilemma as he stood there staring at the three sound ninja that stood in front of him knives prepared to be thrown into his lungs, heart, eye sockets, and just about any other place that one could think to throw a kunai. Naruto thought back to the last thought he had and was greeted with several thoughts. One involved the many … inappropriate things he could do with the sound kunoichi, and several other women.

Naruto shook himself of those thoughts, this wasn't the time to start having an actual sex drive. He charged creating two shadow clones to back him up, he managed to knock out the girl but the two other ninja's were still a problem as they managed to get past his initial attack and destroy his clones. Naruto remained vigilant but tit was futile as he soon felt a kunai violently enter the base of his neck and slash upward effectively killing him and his world grew dark. How ever two seconds later The light of the world greeted Naruto's eyes and so did the sight of his dead body. "What the hell is going on here" shouted Naruto getting the attention of the other two genin trying kill his sleeping teammates.

"How… we killed you, that was no clone just what are you trying to pull" Shouted Zaku.

This made Naruto angrier he was apparently face to face with his own murderer even though he was just killed himself. "Well I am pulling your arms off and I'm not just trying" Naruto said with an inhuman burst of speed dashed behind Zaku and grabbed his arms pulling them as hard as he could.

Zaku screamed in pain then felt a slight moment of relief as his left arm was released and felt pain again as a kunai was shoved underneath the shoulder blade of his right arm. "Please release my teammate and we will leave peacefully" Offered a shocked Dosu "We will even surrender our scroll to you" He could think of nothing else to do against an opponent who apparently could come back from the dead.

Naruto who was feeling tired from his sudden rush of energy from god knows where decided to take the offer not feeling all that up to fighting at the particular moment. "Sure just drop your scroll and leave" He barked coming out as an order and not a request.

They did as he said picking up their female teammate and leaving the clearing. Naruto then panicked contemplating his next course of action. He then made a drastic decision, he took his dead body and removed the clothes and gear, pocketing the weapons for later use, and used it to start a fire along with the kindling. He then began chopping up the body and burned the head along with the rest of the skin. Naruto was trying with all his might to think straight and devise another plan but his mind fought back saying he was already this far and he couldn't stop now. He was preparing to burn the meat when Sakura woke up for her shift "Hey Naruto its time for us to switch shifts, oh you made some food… you sure did find a lot what did you do kill a bear" She asked looking at the pile of uncooked meat.

Naruto's eyes darted quickly back and forth thinking of an excuse "Well ya sort of, you see this thing, I wasn't sure what it was but it was humanoid, came along and I guess we were trespassing in it's territory because it all of a sudden went nuts and attacked and knocked me down, it almost got you but luckily I was able to hi tit with a kunai at the base of the neck, I tossed the head a few minutes a go" He said trying to keep his story simple and believable.

Sakura just stared at him questioning if what he said actually true before deciding it most likely was. "Well I guess it called the forest of death for a reason, being filled with strange and violent animals and all" She said before grabbing a piece of meat and something to cook it on.

Naruto just stood there, watching as Sakura cooked his own dead body. It scared and confused him, he clearly remembered dieing ,still felt it too, and yet here he was walking and breathing like nothing happened. He then heard a rustling in the bush, and tensed up only to relax as team 10 walked into the clearing. "Hey is everything alright here we heard a lot of noise and Naruto scream and thought we would come make sure your okay" Shikamaru said standing next to a drooling Choji and a starving Ino.

"It's okay it was probably just Naruto shouting when he took down this creature he saw, come on join us, Naruto brought back enough meat for all of us" Sakura said inviting team 10 to eat the food with them.

They sat down grabbing some meat and putting it in the pan with Sakura's. Sasuke woke up not long after that a pain in his shoulder being a persistently annoying

thorn in his side. He sat down also grabbing a piece of meat, and Naruto could only watch as they cooked up the flesh of his own dead body a fact that still unnerved him, why did he die then come back: it just didn't make sense. he continued his ramblings until Sakura knocked him out of his thoughts "Hey Naruto have some you deserve it after all" She said giving him a piece of his cooked flesh.

"Sure Sakura" Naruto managed to force out of his mouth which was preparing its self to hurl.

He watched as the others enjoyed the meal commenting on the unique taste while Naruto wallowed in the fact that this made them cannibals. Naruto knowing they would suspect something if he didn't eat sucked it up eating and despising every bite of his own flesh denying himself that the cooked flesh tasted better then most of the usual stuff he ate. They continued on eating and it wasn't long until they finished. Naruto was pushed to brink of sanity having eaten and watched his teammates and friends eat his own dead body. The very fact the he was dead yet still living unnerved him greatly, if it wasn't for the fact that they managed to get another scroll off a dead iwa team and get to the tower in a day without running into any other teams Naruto probably would have been dead … again.

When they got in the tower they opened the scrolls, and threw them on the floor which summoned Iruka who had volunteered to greet them. He informed them that they had gotten to the tower with one day to spare and so they were allowed a day of rest. Naruto immediately picked the single bed in the room Leaving Sakura and Sasuke to share the bunk bed.

As Naruto slept he was greeted with visions of four boys in a snow covered town. He was also shown some other kids, and as he went over them he was flashed an image of the same person only they looked different somehow. It was obvious they where older but there was something else Naruto couldn't place. Something was telling Naruto to find these people, this same something was also the voice in his head that seemed to be doing something to him, like improving him or… reminding him. What would he need to be reminded of and then it hit him… he needed to remember his life.

**FIRST CHAPTER kind of short but it's good right?**


	2. Preliminaries

**DEAD MAN STILL WALKS**

**Chapter 2: Preliminaries**

Naruto stood at the railing watching the ongoing matches while people took occasionally glances at him. He was compelled to change his attire the previous night so he looked through what he had packed, looking for something different, yet similar to what he currently wore. He ended up with an orange hoody with black gloves and black track pants with an orange strip going down the leg. He also had a black scarf around his neck, so overall his attire was very civilian which confused some of the people there. The sound girl was staring at him intently before she was called to the field, her teammates did as well. They new his secret, he was a walking dead man. The strange thing was it didn't even bother him now it, it was like its happened so many times before that once more didn't really matter.

He stood there bored and very distracted by the women in the room, he didn't really know why but his interest in the opposite sex, which was above average before, had sky rocket in a very drastic way. It was getting harder and harder for him to not look at the crazy bitch that cut his cheek every second. He was also making it his top priority to get laid, becoming hokage could wait, and well…he was pretty focused on that goal. Then something called his attention firmly, his name was on the board that meant he got to fight. His opponent was Kiba who had already hopped onto the field proclaiming that he got lucky and that he would be done in a second. He jumped over the rail and took his spot in the center facing Kiba.

"Hey dobe just give up now you don't stand a chance" Said Kiba taunting him, so Naruto decided to throw one back.

"Hmmm. At least I can get laid" He mumbled, which was loud enough to be heard by Kiba.

-------------Balcony----------------------------------------------

The sound team looked on in interest while they nursed their wounds. This boy was apparently held back three years before graduating and was older then anyone else in his class. Yet the pathetic, and apparently sex obsessed, ninja could cheat death like no other. More specifically Kin was interested in the boy, he was powerful and an oddity, possibly the only one who could free her from… him.

-----------------The floor---------------------------------------------

Kiba just looked at the idiot blonde in front of him, his last comment was a total mockery of him, he was Alpha of this pack and wasn't just gonna let some no name outcast get the best of him. He dashed forward and socked him hard in the stomach which sent Naruto towards the wall. Kiba smirked when he heard the telltale crack of Naruto's neck snapping, then grimaced when the wall he hit gave way and collapsed on the blondes skull killing the blonde idiot, blood then pulled around outside the rocks. Everything went silent as people just looked at the sight in shock.

"-Hack- winner by killing blow -hack- Kiba Inuzuk…" Hayate was cut off by kiba flying back from a fist, a dead mans fist.

"YOU FUCK WAD DO YOU REALIZE HOW MUCH IT HURTS TO HAVE YOUR HEAD CRUSHED GODDAMMIT" Naruto shouted perfectly fine his eyes brimming with rage.

"wha..huh.. How" Was all kiba could muster saying staring at Naruto then the body half covered in ruble before being kicked in the side.

-----------------------------------Balcony-----------------------------------

Every one was wide eye at the death defying boy. They all saw it and they couldn't believe it, Orochimaru was standing there foaming at the mouth that this nobody that resembled the Fourth Hokage had seemingly found a way to cheat death, even dead that idiot that stole his position mocked him. Kakashi however just stood there, the crushed by rocks part was… familiar enough to send him on a trip down memory lane. All else were in shock and awe at this amazing ability to transcend ones death.

* * *

Naruto charged like a man possessed and punched kiba in the gut the second he rebounded of the wall. Kiba flew back into the wall where Naruto slammed his knee into the mutts stomach. Then an onslaught of punches each of them slamming kiba back into the wall, but Kiba managed to adjust himself enough to be able to slip past the last punch and kick Naruto back. He indented the wall and slumped down, he was trembling and trying to stand up. Kiba took the opportunity to call Akamaru to him and activate the man beast clone technique. In a flash there were two Kiba's standing there and then both leaped off and started spinning with a shout of "FANG OVER FANG".

Naruto stood there watching the approaching hurricanes of fangs, claws and fists. He tore the ripped sleeves of the orange hood off to reveal the black shirt sleeves from his undershirt. He pulled the orange hood up and slipped the scarf over his mouth leaving only his eyes exposed. He then settled into a pose that looked vaguely similar to Iron fist. He stood there waiting for kiba's unguided attack to head towards him. "THIS TIME STAY DOWN" Shouted kiba as he and Akamaru picked up speed.

Naruto waited till the last second then lashed a fist at kiba's face ,sending him into a wall again and the blasting Akamaru back with an elbow to the head. "What was that Kiba" Naruto taunted the scarf over his mouth muffling him.

"I said stay DOWN" And again kiba launched forward with a fang over fang along with Akamaru targeting him from both sides there was no possible escape.

Naruto Sighed and jumped into the air, where the duo followed him. He then went into a back flip and grabbed each of the attackers and flung them to the ground finishing the flip. They hit the ground hard dispelling the technique over them. "And that Kiba is game,set and match" Naruto said casually pulling down his scarf and hood as he walked towards the steps.

"Winner of the seventh match is Naruto Uzumaki will the combatants for the next match please step down to the floor when your name is displayed" Announced Hayate his cough only prevailing slightly at the end.

Naruto calmly walked up the stairs and approached his team, but he was interrupted by a meek timid voice "Na-Naru-Naruto-kun I think you could use this" Said Hinata holding up a can of healing salves, eyes closed and cheeks flared.

Naruto just looked on with his bored expression before grabbing the can while thanking her, before turning around and walking over to his team. He looked up at the electronic display board and raised an eyebrow at the two names called "Hyuuga… are Hinata and this Neji guy related?" he asked watching them start their match in the arena floor.

"Yes they are Naruto-kun they belong to the same clan, but Neji-kun is part of the Branch house and they are basically servants and body guards to the main branch" explained Lee before his face became serious "But I believe you are a much youthful puzzle Naruto-kun could you please explain what happened to you out there" His tone being a cross between shocked , excited and inquisitive.

Naruto just stared at the boy with the two inch eyebrows before answering " Honestly Lee I have no clue but… I can honestly say that if it keeps up like this and I still can't explain it, well I'm going to need a hell of a lot of pain killers and I just might honestly develop a fear of death" his eyes still holding a brightness but their warmth seemed to disappear for an instant.

"That is most disturbing my youthful comrade" said the exuberant green youth before they turned their attention back to the floor were Neji was decimating Hinata.

Neji's brutal onslaught at Hinata continued unopposed, breaking through every defense Hinata could put up. At the last blow Neji flung Hinata across the arena floor and waited for her to stand up before attacking again, aiming straight for her heart. All of the Johnin sensei in the room immediately dashed down to the floor and blocked Neji's path to Hinata. "Its over Neji you've won, but you disappoint me that your flames weren't bright enough to see through your hate" said Gai as he stared sternly at Neji only to suddenly look back at hinata as she went into ventricular fibrillation and fell to the ground. It was then Naruto, Lee and Sakura leaped down from the balcony and ran to Hinata's side. She lost consciousness when the medics finally got out to the field. As they lifted her onto the gurney Naruto turned to face Neji "I don't take kindly to people that kill their allies"

Neji just smirked and turned around walking towards the balcony "whatever you say Mr. Failure"

He scowled, Neji wasn't going to get away with this that easily. He dipped his Hand in a puddle of Hinata's blood and made an oath "Mark my words Neji, I will defeat you and when I do you'll fall off that little throne of yours, you'll fall hard"

Neji just stared impassively before ignoring the boy who just vowed to beat him, like all the others that did. Naruto scowled again before proceeding up to the balcony where he encountered the guy wearing a hood with make up on his face. He was apparently interested in the guy that was going up against his brother, who he kept saying was going to decimate the green guy. Naruto stated that he knew very little about the guy except the stuff he learned about him during the year they were in the same class at the academy. When the match started every body was in shock at the way that Garra kid was able to effortlessly control the sand without any movement, the next shock came when Lee removed his weights. It was then that sand started to fly in all directions as the kicks and punches lee whipped out hit with a practiced strength and accuracy. There was a major disappointment however when Garra unleashed his full furry as the sand seemed to consume the ground surrounding Lee before grabbing his arm and leg and crushing them.

After that ruthless Garra kids match his brother, whose name was Kankuru, went to go join his brother and sister. The last match was very uninteresting as Choji was easily taken down by Dosu. The girl on the team from Sound however seemed more interested in him than the match.

After all the matches had been completed every one who passed stepped down onto the floor and stood in front of the hokage who proceeded to explain what will happen for the final stage. "One month from now the final stage of the Chunin exams will begin, you will stand in front of the daimyos from all lands, leaders of settlements, and Shinobi from all over the globe. You no longer are an individual seeking advancement, your are the face given to the skill of your villages genin, and by proxy all other ninja. It is that reason along with the fact you have all seen each other fight that we are giving one months time to train and prepare your self to surprise and defend against your opponents I now wish you all well" said the Third hokage.

The Genin in the room turned to leave having already drawn their opponents , heard their instructions and dedicated their minds to fine tuning and increasing heir skills. However the Hokage had something important to say to one young ninja "Ah Naruto could you please stay for a minute I need to have a word with you" His voice was not the voice of a grandfather but that of a commander, it made Naruto nervous as he walked up to the Hokage "Naruto what have you done"

"What are you talking about old man" Naruto shot back angrily.

The hokage then seemed to get very angry "NARUTO I'M BEING SERIOUS DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU HAVE DONE, WHY IS IT THAT DEATH DOESN"T CLAIM YOU WHERE YOU STAND"

Naruto's face then suddenly became very grim "I wish I knew old man, I wish I knew" he sighed shaking his head before his eyes shot open and he spun around "YOU ,KIN WAS IT, STOP HIDING OVER THERE YOU GOT SOMETHING TO SAY"

All attention was turned to the young girl who shyly stepped out from behind the entrance of the door. It made the Hokage just sigh with regret, he was becoming sloppy or age was finally catching up with him. Kin stepped forward and expelled a nervous breathe before dropping to her knees at the Hokage's feet " Please listen to me Hokage-sama I seek refuge from sound" She was begging, at his feet begging for the Hokage to listen to her plea.

The Hokage just stared at her impassively "Alright girl we will discuss this as soon as I'm done with Naruto here" He said before turning his attention back at the odd boy "What do you mean you don't know"

" I mean just that, I don't know! So far all I have been able to figure out is that my chakra has recently started to develop a chaotic feel and that the more chaotic it gets the more dangerous it seems to get for me, right now I only have a theory and it needs to be tested but I think I know where I might get some answers" Naruto explained his face holding a mature quality that seemed almost foreign to him.

"Where would that be exactly ?"

"In the Badlands that border the parts of the ninja world, small settlements dot the area just beyond the borders of our country, Something is telling me to head there, I don't know what but whatever, or whoever is out there might have the answers" Naruto's face seemed to lighten up but the serious tone was still there.

The Sandmaine seemed to think it over before dejecting it "No, no I can't allow it Naruto the council would have my hide if gave you the permission to do such a thing alone, and besides you should be training for the chunin exams not following your thoughts on a wild goose chase"

"Then send me with a Johnin willing to teach me or something I don't care but I can tell something Lies in those badlands and it calling out to me ,it may just be the answer to this whole mess" Naruto shouted angrily at the old man.

He sighed dejecting before he thought of something "Well if you feel that strongly about it I may have a solution to the problem come to my office in about three days I should have something all set up then" He then turned his attention to the young women on the ground pleading for refuge "Now what is it that you need"

When the hokage addressed her Kin got up on her feet and faced the old kage alright in the face "Orochimaru is the leader of the sound village, he ordered me and my team to enter the exams and to kill Sasuke Uchiha, what we didn't know was that he was using us as pawns to test Sasuke after giving him a curse seal, in short he was sending us to our deaths, I can tell that he wants Sasuke for the Sharingan and was willing to use us to get him, luckily ummm…ah Uzumaki over there was the first to wake up and managed to scare off my team with his little gift, anyway the point is Orochimaru is planning something big, I don't know when or what but I can tell you that it won't be good" Kin said pausing every once in a while to catch her breath.

Sabutori just stared at her with the same impassive face he always used for politics and the such. His face could also be described as questioning and confused "Girl.."

"my name is Kin" she interrupted not liking being referred to simply as girl.

Sabutori sighed , kids these days had no respect "Kin you do realize any pull you had over me with that information is now gone, what do you expect to gain from all this"

Kin's eyes grew soft, the stern poker faced look she had earlier disappearing "I want to be safe, in sound no one is safe, we are all at risk for being pulled aside and being subjected to one of Orochimaru's experiments, especially those that fail any task or mission that Orochimaru gave to them personally, do you see where I'm going" Kin asked her eyes on the brink of tears "I seek asylum here in Kohona, and not just that Orochimaru will find out about this, he will send people to kill me, I would do anything to be safe and Uzumaki over there is my best bet at safety"

It was at this did Hiruzen realize what the girl was asking "You know the laws of Kohona do you not?"

Kin only nodded her head hanging downwards ,in shame or sadness no one could tell. Hiruzen turned towards Naruto, who had stayed to figure out what was going on "Naruto do you know what kin is offering"

He shook his head "No I don't old man, what is she offering"

The "old man" sighed which was becoming a common occurrence with him rather quickly " What it means Naruto is that she is offering her self to you as a slave and concubine in exchange for the safety and protection our village offers her"

"What" gasped Naruto his eyes the size of dinner plates.

Hiruzen grinned, it was always fun to surprise Naruto like this " According to the tenants of Kohona ,the original laws set by the first hokage, any shinobi or kunoichi seeking asylum in our village will be offered such in exchange for information, however if they are deemed untrustworthy or have no information to give they are given to the council or a clan as a slave. They may even seek the protection of a clan , doing so will ensure that if any reasons to doubt their loyalty are brought up they will become the property of that clan instead of another. Kin here just gave all the information she had to barter with and has pleaded to you for the protection of your clan as not to become a slave of the council, so what will you do Naruto? this young girl's life rests in your hands" Hiruzen's grin never left his face as he asked this question.

Naruto looked towards Kin and grimaced at the pleading and longing look in her eyes ,they were practically begging for him to say yes. Then as if on cue Kin saw the uncertainty in his eyes and her eyes began to fill with tears ,he couldn't take it anymore "ARG, alright old man, Kin on my honor as an Uzumaki I vow that I will protect you from the vultures that occupy the village council seats" He recited as kin jumped at him grabbing him tightly and jumping up and down while squeezing his face into her chest.

Hiruzen laughed at the scene in front of him and called the two to attention as he took them to his office. There he applied the necessary seal to the back of Kin's neck and sent the two on their way home. He smiled as he watched Naruto guide kin towards his apartment from his office window. After a few moments of watching the touching seen the smile fell from his face. Walking over to his desk he pressed a button on its underside calling the secretary to his office "Yes Hokage-sama?" Said the secretary who looked no older that twenty- three.

"I need you to contact Danzo this instant and tell him to report to my office immediately it is of the up most importance" Said the aged leader his voice once again radiating a tone that held power and commanded respect.

"Right away sir" she said slipping out the door to follow orders.

In no more than five minutes Danzo was standing in front of him "What is so important Hiruzen, I have urgent business to attend to'

The hokage seemed to take on a reminiscent expression if only slightly "Danzo do you remember when we were genin taking our first chunin exam?"

The question confused the war hawk "Yes I remember it well… are you going somewhere with this or did you just call me for a trip down memory lane?" The pointlessness of the conversation angered him greatly.

"Do you remember what you said as we walked passed the great stone gates of Iwa"

This seemed to strike a cord with the man "Yes I do, I said that holding such a tournament inside village walls, while inviting your enemies, was like an invitation to be invaded and that it would be the perfect opportunity to pull a turncoat and an ambush all at once… what is the point with all this Hiruzen are you suggesting…" Danzo said his eye widened at the implications.

Hiruzen cut him off before Danzo could finish "No, I am not suggesting we do such a thing but…Our alliance with sand has been strained recently with the wind daimyo sending more and more missions our way and I just got word that Orochimaru is the leader of sound, he has also been spotted in the forest of death during the exams," Hiruzen paused to let the information sink in "We are also getting reports of suspicious movement from both parties military forces, they seem to be testing our borders looking for ways to sneak through, all of this is strange when looked at separately but together…well I wouldn't put it past Orochimaru to manipulate sand into attacking us to get some sort of revenge for taking their clientele… but in any case it's like you said Danzo during the final stage of the chunin exams…the host is vulnerable"

Danzo's face darkened " Not all problems can be solved through peace Hiruzen"

Hiruzen's face then became as hard as steel "On the day of the tournament have all Johnin alerted to the code "the winds are blowing, yet the pinwheel is still " and have the Anbu raise their security protocols to level N and leave no record of this conversation, you know Orochimaru has his way with planting spies"

As Danzo left he snorted " I still can't believe you created a higher level of security and named it after that boy'

Hiruzen smirked at his retreating form "Yes but you have to admit, he has seen more flaws in the system then any of us have"

"So true, and so pathetic" Was the only response Danzo had.

**END CHAPTER**

**To any readers ,if there are any, If you are wondering what the badlands are it is the area outside the borders of the shinobi world, they are the people who refused the Sage of sixth paths teachings, then there are places beyond the badlands that follow different teachings. The badlands are not entirely dangerous but it is unclaimed land making it a highly disputed territory, yet truly makes it unique is the bad lands are a highly diverse area and can change drastically in climate and terrain. It is also where most criminals of the world flee to when escaping their societies law. Shinobi however believe that crossing the badlands is certain death as they do not know what lies beyond their borders.**


	3. Booty calls, perverts and epiphany

**DEAD-MAN STILL WALKS**

**Chapter 3: Booty calls, perverts, and an epiphany**

Naruto Uzumaki walked down the street with his new concubine, or slave, but he preferred concubine it somehow seemed slightly less degrading towards Kin. Speaking of Kin she was extremely silent the moment she stepped out of the Hokage's tower. Her eyes kept darting around like she was being watched, and Naruto was getting irritated by it. "Kin are you feeling alright?" He asked concern prominent in his voice.

"Yeah I'm alright it's just that I'm worried that there is someone out there trying to get me" Kin responded rubbing her arm while her eyes darted around.

"Well calm down, if any thing happens I'm here for you, now before we head home is there anything you need to buy" Naruto said comforting her while rubbing her shoulders.

"Um… what do you mean" Kin was clearly confused by his generosity.

"I mean do you need any clothes, items, medicines you know stuff like that" Naruto explained listing off groups of things Kin might need off his fingers.

"Oh… well there are some things I need if I'm going to be your…property" Kin said fighting a blush at the prospect, she didn't know what was going on with her but for some reason Naruto seemed to become more appealing every second.

"Alright here is my wallet, I've got some stuff to do in the market, you can go get your clothes and stuff and I can get what I need, then we'll stop by grocer and pick up some food for dinner, I'm afraid that most of the food I have at home is ramen" Naruto explained taking some money out of his wallet and handing then handing it to Kin who nodded and ran off towards the pharmacy.

Naruto then turned around and walked towards the only weapon store in Kohona that he trusted to give him quality equipment. It was also the store that Tenten worked at, she was a friend of his from the orphanage who managed to get apprenticed to a local blacksmith, He had seen her participate in the chunin exams and was assured that her love of all things sharp and pointy had not faded but grew. He walked into the store to see Tenten at the counter flipping through a magazine filled with all different types of weapons. The walls of the old shop were lined and coated with weapons of different shapes and quality all with a small price tag hanging from them, some where obviously ornamental while others had an edge destined for combat. Walking up to the counter Naruto casually greeted his long time friend "Hey Tenten, how are you today?"

Tenten looked up from her magazine with a very relaxed look "Pretty good, I mean ya my back was bent into a very uncomfortable angle a few hours ago but after they patched me up and gave me the pain killers I started to feel better, how about you I heard you gave everyone quite a show during your match, I wish I could have seen it" She said her arms relaxing sprawling her out on to the counter.

"Umm… Ya hey Tenten do you remember those experimental chakra abnormality detection units you were talking about, well I need one of those with some new Kunai knives" Naruto asked taking advantage of his friends drug induced giddiness.

"Alrighty then I just go round back and get them, hey you should check out this article on shuriken and kunai in Weapons Monthly it so great" Tenten said lifting her self from the counter top and walked into the back room, everyone of her steps her uneven and unbalanced displaying just how many painkillers she was given.

Naruto just looked at the sight of a doped up Tenten wander into the back room. Still that article she mentioned was interesting, from what he knew weapon monthly only went over the most complicated or stylish weapons out there, they even went over weapon styles but this was different, kunai and shuriken were like the ninja bread and butter, anyone could identify or use them with little effort, although he admitted the way he put it greatly simplified their use but still. So he decided it was worth a peak, picking up the magazine that Tenten had left on the counter he looked over the page that Tenten was reading and was greatly enthralled. The subject it was talking about was so simple that it amazed him that he never thought of this before, Kunai had so many different shapes and forms streaming from its basic design, that it greatly overwhelmed the type of shuriken there were, in fact Naruto could only think of three , the classic four large four small pronged Shuriken, the modern four point star shuriken and the demon windmill shuriken. This then opened Naruto's eyes to another fact, if he could make a fighting style based on the manipulation of the shape of a shuriken he would become an infamous counting the money he had Naruto realized that he had just enough to fit in a few classic shuriken "HEY TENTEN WHILE YOUR BACK THERE CAN YOU GET ME TWO CLASSIC EIGHT POINT SHURIKEN" He shouted hoping that Tenten could hear him.

"SURE THING" She shouted back the relaxed tone form the medicine still thick in her voice.

Just a few moments later Tenten walked out with a strange contraption and a package of shuriken and a set of brand new knives all ready to go. Tenten motioned for him to stick his arm out and he complied. She fastened the device on like a watch as Naruto felt two tubes press them selves two his skin. He suddenly felt a slight drain in chakra before it disappeared, he looked at the device now attached to his arm, there was a green bar that screeched across the screen that would occasionally incline slightly with a very long bump. Tenten then began to explain how the watch worked "That little green line is the detection of abnormalities, the flatter it is the more normal it is but the more incline it has the stronger the abnormality, the only flaw in its design that keeps it from being officially approved is that it can't differentiate abnormalities, and that is really all there is to know about that thing" She said stretching her self onto the counter again as she continued to read her magazine.

Naruto thanked her and walked out the door the shuriken and kunai neatly put into their pouches. Exiting the shop he spotted Kin walking towards the clothing shop carrying a bag from the pharmacy, so he rushed over to her side. She was startled but relaxed when she saw who it was. They walked into the store and Kin immediately began dragging Naruto through the isles piling clothes into his arms, it seemed that no matter the girl they all had some impulsive need to try on as many clothes as possible before picking out the few that they want. So after about Five minutes of Kin picking out the clothes she would try she dragged Naruto over to the dressing rooms, pushed him into a chair, took the clothes out of his arms and dashed into one of the dressing rooms. She would come out every once in awhile to get Naruto's opinion on an outfit and so far she had three. After a while Kin had picked out all five of the out fits she decided she liked and retreated back into the dressing room to get back into her own clothes. While Naruto waited for Kin to finish getting dressed he was approached by someone he knew "Naruto… what are you doing in a women's clothing store?" It was Sakura and the question that seemed to come out very calmly was screeched out like a banshee.

"Well… you see" Naruto tried to explain but the way Sakura glared at him made him very nervous.

"Hey Naruto I'm ready lets go pay for these then we can go get some food" Kin said walking out of the dressing room with her choices in hand , but froze when she saw the pink haired girl who was trying to strangle her new master "GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY MASTER" Kin shouted at the blossom haired brat.

"MASTER!!! NARUTO WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS" Sakura said strangling him even harder till he punched her in the jaw, which knocked her to the side causing her to release her grip.

"Kin was seeking asylum from sound, she begged to the hokage and gave up all information she had on sound while seeking my protection, however because she gave up her information before an agreement was put up she would be sentenced to be a slave of the council or one of Kohona's clans, however because she was under my protection she was placed under my care as a slave" Naruto explained as he grabbed hold of Kin's hand and walked towards the stores counter.

"HEY NARUTO GET BACK HERE I WASN"T DONE, HEY DON"T IGNORE ME" Shouted Sakura shaking he fist at the forms of Kin and Naruto before giving up on petty violence "maybe Kakashi sensei would know what to do about this" Sakura said walking out of the store towards the hospital, where Kakashi was looking over Sasuke's wounds.

While sakura left to find answers Naruto and Kin where heading home. Their walk was silent and was making Kin feel quite uncomfortable. So she did what she could, try and spark a conversation. "So Naruto um… what did you get" Kin warily asked hoping he wouldn't think she was prying.

"Well I got an abnormality detector which is going to help me figure out what's going on with the whole… dying thing, some kunai, and two classic shuriken" Naruto explained shifting through his bag as he did.

"Classic shuriken… aren't those a little unpractical" Kin said with doubt of her masters decisions.

"Yes well I saw an article on shuriken discussing the many different forms of kunai compared to the three of the shuriken so I'm going to work on a creating new types of shuriken as well as a fighting style based around them" Naruto said.

They soon reached Naruto's apartment complex, Kin noticed that it was practically Vacant and that there was graffiti at some places lots of graffiti. Naruto stopped at the top floor and pulled out a key. When he opened the door kin was amazed, he had a pent house suite up here. She looked towards Naruto and he could tell she wanted an explanation "Since I'm the only tenant here the landlord handed the deed over to me, believing he couldn't get a profit with a demon living here, thus as the landlord I could do what ever I want with the place and I decided to turn the top floor into my personal penthouse, it was a lot of work but in the end it was worth it… Okay so your room is over there" Naruto began but was interrupted by Kin.

"Um…if you don't mind I would like to sleep with you" Kin asked nervously.

Naruto just turned towards her and looked at her strangely. "Well since I'm your slave I thought I should get used to… well you know" Kin explained rubbing the back of her head.

Naruto simply looked at her "If that's what you wish"

Kin would never deny that a that moment she truly felt safe for the first time in a long while.

---------------------The Next Morning---------------------

Naruto awoke to feel an unfamiliar weight on his chest, looking down he saw kin had shifted in her sleep an now was on top of him. He lied there for a few seconds allowing his drowsiness to disappear before he realized that Kin was grinding up against him, and his morning glory was very… glorious. It took every ounce of control he had not to take advantage of this, Damn ass sexy slave chick or not he would never take advantage of a women…most of the time. He grabbed her ass and gave it a squeeze, which unfortunately woke her up so he quickly moved his hand up to her waist hoping she wouldn't suspect anything.

"Ahu…I was having the best dream ever, what woke me up" Kin said looking at him with drowsy eyes.

"I did now get up we have to meet the Old man at noon to meet the guy who's going to teach me while we're traveling so get up and make some breakfast I've got too record some data I'll be there out soon" Naruto said getting up from the bed and getting dressed as Kin rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and did the same.

Naruto sat at his desk and looked at the watch, recording the data from the chakra levels. It apparently had an increase in abnormalities, and he noticed that his chakra had grown more chaotic, he began recording the data in his notebook feverously. He turned around when he heard a knock on his door, it was Kin "Breakfast is ready" She said walking in and peering over his shoulder "So all this is to figure out how you defy death right" She asked it was a simple question.

Naruto looked at her "Yes but not only that, I also feel a sudden backlash of power when I "resurrect" so I think that when I hit a certain point my chakra will either try to destroy me if not used or temporarily power me, but it's just a theory" He tried to explain more but he then heard a Knock on his front door.

He sighed and got up walking form his room to the door hoping that it wasn't one of the ignorant villagers. He groaned when he saw it was Kakashi and Sasuke, he so wasn't in the mood for Sasuke's emo ranting and complaining. "May we come in" Kakashi asked, he may of hated him but he had to admit the guy was polite.

"Sure Kakashi-sensei" Naruto said opening the door for them Kakashi walked in with his relaxed way as usual while sasuke walked in with his mightier than thou sneer on his face.

Kakashi looked around with a look of amazement on his face, it was a completely different place than it was before. Sasuke simply looked around bored, that is till he saw Kin. His face then gained a predatory grin which made Kin slowly back out of the room. They sat on the couch while Naruto sat in a chair across from them. "Okay what do you want from me" Naruto said outright without any pauses.

"Well we heard from sakura yesterday that you had gained the sound kunoichi Kin as a slave, when Sasuke heard this he immediately decided that he would like to revive his clan with her and came to see if you would generously.." Kakashi didn't get to finish.

"No, Kin begged for protection from me and no one else, She trusted me to treat her with dignity and I will I will not simply trade her away like a mere toy" Naruto said stern and unmoving.

"Damn it You idiot I am an Uchiha and you dare refuse me" Sasuke shouted leaping up from his seat pulling a Kunai from his pocket.

"Oh so your going to try kill me ,good luck with that, people been having a lot of trouble with that recently it seems" Naruto said grinning ear to ear pulling out a shuriken.

"Sasuke calm down" Kakashi said dragging Sasuke to the door "Its obvious we've overstayed our welcome"

"Yes it is Hatake" Naruto said angrily while storming off to his room to check on Kin.

Kakashi then left without any words, and Naruto opened the door to his room. He saw Kin sitting on his bed crying. Naruto sat down next to her and rubbed her back. "I heard what you said about me" Kin said her head still in her hands.

"So you heard everything else too huh…" Naruto said nervously.

"Yes… thanks for not giving in, I think the Uchiha kid would use me till I was worthless and then kill me himself…but" Kin said lifting her head out of her hands.

"I think I know what your getting at, all he needs is the backing of the council, which would be easy since they worship the ground he walks on, and he could get you in his clutches" Naruto said sighing at the predicament.

Kin looked towards Naruto hopefully "If he can get me that easily…I just want my fist time to be with someone I know and trust"

Naruto looked at Kin shocked "Are you asking me to…"

**LEMON ALERT**(Not like anyone is going to skip this)

Kin only nodded as she unbuttoned her blouse and laid out on the bed "Do with me as you wish _Master_"

Naruto gulped, Kin sure was being forward. He leaned down and kissed her hard on the lips, It wasn't long until they were making out and Kin was completely out of her blouse.

Naruto reached around her and ,clumsily, unhooked her bra and threw it to the side. While Naruto kissed and massaged Kin, she was unbuttoning his shirt. She finished and found a thin but chiseled body with well defined muscles. They continued making out removing articles of clothing as they went along. Naruto leaned forward pushing Kin onto the bed as he begun to caress every part of her body. She shivered at his touch , she could feel the raw emotion that was pouring out from the both of them. All the lust and desire that they held were all being released at that moment.

Naruto parted her legs to reveal her soaking wet pussy. He positioned himself at the entrance and looked into her eyes. She nodded and he plunged in breaking the barrier that was her maidenhood. Naruto stood still as Kin's eyes were clinched shut with pain and her fingernails dug into his back, he winced when one of them drew blood. It didn't take long before Kin's pain was but a dull throb and Naruto continued. He thrust into her powerfully with each swoop, his hands massaging her breasts while he leaned over and locked lips with her. He pounded into her and with every pace he went faster and faster. Kin's ability to talk had been hampered down by the pleasure to groans and moans. She could feel her climax approaching. Her eyes widened as she felt the pressure leap in bounds.

"I-I-I'm go-gonn-gonna Cu-cum" Kin stuttered out as Naruto continued.

He felt her warm, moist walls clench around him as Kin hit her orgasm. He couldn't stop himself form releasing himself into her womb. He did what he could to continue as Kin's walls seemed to milk his seed from him. He soon stopped, exhausted from the pleasure, and caught his breathe. He leaned over to Kin's ear and said "Ready for round two Kin"

Kin only nodded blinded by the pleasure she had received.

**LEMON END**

It was an hour before Naruto and Kin left the apartment intent on heading to the Hokage's office to meet Naruto's escort.

--------HOKAGE'S TOWER----------

"So your preparing for an invasion huh Sensei, I told you Orochimaru would try this"

Said an seemingly middle aged man with long spikey white hair.

"Yes I know you've said it a million times" Hiruzen said as he heard a knock on the door "Come on in"

The door opened to reveal Naruto and Kin who walked in. Sabutori smiled as he addressed the two "Naruto, Kin this here is the man who will train you while guiding you two through the badlands, He is a student of mine and I trust that you'll respect his title of Gama-sennin" he said motioning to the tall man beside him.

"Hello you two, I am Jiraya" He said holding out his hand.

They awkwardly shook his hand while looking at him in amazement. He then looked them straight in the eyes and said "Both of you get packed we'll be gone for a month so pack anything you may need, when your done with that meet me at the south gate we got some walking to do"

**END CHAPTER 3**

**So how was it , was the lemon any good it was the first one I've actually written I hope I get better it felt awkward writing it. BYE **


	4. Chapter 4

**DEAD MAN WALKING**

**Chapter 4: Journey to the south (A PARODY of JOURNEY TO THE WEST(not really))**

Naruto walked along a beaten path with Jiraya and Kin. They had been traveling for several day ,four to be exact, and were nearing the border of the ninja realm. Jiraya grabbed both of the young travelers shoulders and turned them around "Remember you two the badlands, while not as dangerous as they say, are lawless except for the towns, all of which have their own rules so be on you toes, we'll officially enter the badlands in a few minutes if we keep up our pace" the Wise man said as he watched the two nod and turn around before switching views to the young woman's ass ' Ah that is one lucky brat I wish I had a girl that sexy when I was his age'.

He turned his attention back to the road, he did after all have to look out for these two.

------------------a few minutes later---------------------------

As the group of three passed over the border they increased their guard. These somewhat lawless lands were war zones and if you dozed off you would end up caught in the middle. Naruto's mind then started to wander before he was bopped upside the head by Jiraya who then told him to look ahead.

It was another hour or two before they came across a town. They were amazed at how the large the town was for a such a dangerous area. Jiraya lead the way buying them some rooms in an Inn. Naruto and Kin immediately went to their room to test out the bed as Jiraya wandered around looking for something interesting to do. He managed to find a sumo arena, much to his joy as he hadn't seen a good match in quite a few years while in the elemental Nations. There was also the prospects of the woman who frequent these events, that lulled him into buying a ticket.

The inside of the arena was pretty plain, but it was typical for a sumo arena, after all they didn't have fancy stage names or anything like that this was a sport of honor and praise. Jiraya waited patiently for the competitors to walk into the ring and begin the match, but was confused when a large man and boy walked out. The boy was large himself but not as big as his opponent, by size ratio even the match was uneven. He was about to point this out when a hand touched his shoulder. Jiraya turned around and saw a woman standing there smiling "Oh don't worry my son is a prodigal Sumo wrestler and can easily take on a man ten times his size… if such a thing is possible" she said the smile never leaving her face.

"Oh really and who might you be" Asked Jiraya curiosity peaked.

"Oh I am but a simple woman, but I'd recognize you anywhere you Jiraya the author of Icha Icha paradise, I once modeled for one of your books" A grin then spread across her face "I can give you a free show if you want"

Jiraya then got a similar grin on his face, this woman modeled for his book, he knew that every single woman who modeled was extremely flexible, otherwise how could they pull off half the poses illustrated in the book. He knew he just hit a Jack pot "Yes I would enjoy that" he said laughing as both adults left the arena to find some place private.

Down in the arena the large boy was looking up in the stands and saw the whole exchange. It wasn't that the woman was flirting with the man, it was that the woman flirting with the man was his Mother "GODDANMIT MOM" He shouted before misplacing his anger on his opponent ending the match extremely fast.

---------------------With Naruto and Kin-----------------------

Naruto and Kin walked down the paths of the town following a strange compass that was tied around Naruto's neck. Kin couldn't help but stare at the odd thing "How in the world did you make that ?" was the only question that was bugging her.

Naruto looked at her and grinned "Well I took an Iron ring and placed this shuriken loosely in it, which allows it to spin, then I took one tip off the shuriken and replaced it with a shard of chakra conducting metal" Naruto held up his necklace "So when I channel my chakra into it, it acts like a compass, pointing in the direction of whomever that it is that I'm supposed to meet here"

Kin looked at it curiously "So the design is that simple! Are you sure it even works?"

Naruto just gave her a blank look before turning back to the compass. Kin huffed, she didn't like it when he didn't answer back, it just irritated her to no end about how stubborn he was.

They walked for a few minutes to find a sumo arena, the compass was pointing inside. Naruto shrugged his shoulders after all his device was never wrong, granted this was the first time it was used but still. Kin however was a little doubting of Naruto's compass, the Sumo arena after all didn't seem like the kind of place that a wise man would be, but Kin was Naruto's slave and she had to follow her master.

When they entered the arena they saw a fairly large boy about their age pushing a man about a half ton bigger than him out of the circle. Naruto's compass tip began to glow slightly while pointing at the boy, it did not go unnoticed. The young sumo then began to walk out of the arena and the glow faded, pointing toward the door the boy had left from. Naruto grabbed Kin's hand and started walking towards the door "I think that guy knows something about what's going on come on Kin"

"Are you sure about this" Kin asked skepticism deeply in her voice.

"Yes I'm sure now get the lead out" Naruto said dragging an unwilling Kin along.

-----------------------In the sauna---------------------------

The sumo boy relaxed as he lowered himself into the hot spring to relax, it was one of the many perks that came with being champion. He looked at a poster and smiled the grand tournament money was as good as his and then he could finally leave this town behind. He loved the town but he had dreams and he wanted to see the world and he had an opportunity to get the money to finance it. His relaxation was interrupted by two people barging into his room. He sat up and shouted at the two "HEY FAGS DIDN"T YOU SEE THE SIGN I DON"T DO INTERVEIWS OR AUTOGRAPHS UNLESS THERES AN EVENT GOING ON" Yelled the boy.

The two just rubbed their head sheepishly "Hey we didn't want an autograph or any thing we just wanted to talk" Said the blonde haired boy with the weird glowing necklace.

"Talk about what and who are you people" the boy said angrily.

"Oh, I'm Naruto and this is my personal servant Kin and we just wanted to know a bit about you" explained the blonde haired boy.

"this is sounding a lot like an interveiw" Mumbled the boy "Okay heres some info for ya, My name is Eric Cartman, my mother moved here when the leader of the Capatasim(1) went power crazy and got shot in the face by his dog, If you call me fat I throw you through the wall, now is that all or do you need my life story too" He shouted never once getting up from his soak in the hot spring.

The name seemed to ring a bell in Naruto's head, it was from one of his past memories, he paid no mind to it as it seemed that the boy had not yet awakened. Naruto turned around and saw a poster for the grand tournament and was enthralled "whoa what's this Grand tournament thing" he said looking at the poster.

Eric looked at them smugly "That's the grand tournament its held only once every 50 years and is the biggest event this side of the bad lands, there is a prize of over 10 million dollars and your looking at the next winner"

Naruto then got an idea "well then your going to have to go through me because I'm signing up and I'm not gonna give up that easily"

Eric seemed to get really happy "Well then I guess we'll just have to find out tomorrow , go to main square and talk to Reaves tell him Eric sent ya and sign up for the tournament, get going eyesore you seem like you can give me a run for my money and I haven't had a real fight in years so go on I want a challenge"

Naruto nodded and ran out of the room Kin following, He was going to sign up for that tournament and win, that would surely wake up the old Cartman, but hopefully not too much of the old Cartman. He knew that he probably didn't hold the answer but the compass was pointing to him so maybe he was just a step in the road.

----------------------------- at the inn-----------------------

Naruto and Kin were getting ready for bed, but Naruto was panicking slightly. After all he had an important tournament the next day and if he was beaten then he probably wouldn't awaken Cartman. There was also the fact that his Chakra seemed to be growing more chaotic even faster than before, it was messing with his data. Apparently his chakra would grow more chaotic with time but when he used jutsu it increased the chaotic tone making his chakra even more unstable. There was also the fact that He hadn't seen Jiraya since the Sannin went out to do some investigating.

Naruto was going over the check list of all the new types of Shuriken he had made that he was going to use. "Okay so I got my sword shuriken and my yoyo shuriken and maybe my ring shuriken and rain shuriken, I've definitely got to try out my new shuriken type though"

Kin snuck up behind him and draped her arms over his shoulder "Come one Naruto just go to bed"

"sorry kin but I can't I still have some work to do if I'm going to win this thing" He said never once looking at her.

Kin got angry, then she had an idea, she smiled mischievously and leaned towards Naruto's ear and whispered something. He immediately stopped what he was doing and picked up Kin tossing her onto the bed. It was a while before either of them fell asleep but it was the best night Naruto had so far.

----------------------------------The Tournament field-------------------

There in all their glory were the thirty two of the most ambitious warriors from all over the world, Eric and Naruto included. They gathered here to fight for their dreams of wealth and power, some for honor, some for glory, some for greed. The combatants all lined up and the roster was filled out. Naruto looked towards Eric, if things went according to plan they would face each other in the final round. Eric glared back before he stepped off the stadium along with thirty other combatants.

Naruto was up first and he was fighting some warrior monk, the monk moved swiftly and struck with a deadly accuracy but Naruto's creative new shuriken designs helped make it impossible for the Monk to move the way he wanted. The fight was fairly one sided till the monk jumped back, kicked up a few shuriken, grabbed them and hurled them at the oncoming blades. They all dropped to the ground harmlessly, which infuriated Naruto. The monk then reached behind his back and pulled out two sai. Naruto morphed two shuriken into makeshift sai and faced the monk at this own game.

Naruto then was locked in a stalemate, both of their sais were crossed ,one wrong move and the other would be struck. The monk then broke away and ducked, performing a sweeping kick, unfortunately Naruto jumped and was able to knock the monk back with a firm kick to the head. The monk smashed into a pillar and was rendered unconscious, Naruto would move onto the second round.

After another six matches it was Eric's match, he was put up against a giant, literally. His opponent was one of the Giant nomads of the sky pillar plateaus, which were so high they were legend to hold up the sky, The plateaus were located at the exact center of the badlands. He swung down with a crushing blow, it was too fast to dodge. Eric stood his ground and raised one hand, he didn't seem to care about what was about to happen. To the giants amazement his fist simply stopped in the boys hand. The boy then grabbed his hand and wrist and flung him over his shoulder into the same pillar Naruto had kicked the warrior monk into. The pillar started to groan, it was obvious that if it took much more punishment it would topple. The giant stood and conceded, because by the ancient rules of his people anyone who beats a giant in strength is their better.

Naruto's next match was from a Dimbala(2) Nation and moved fast and stuck hard, his main objective was to kill as efficiently as possible. If Naruto lost it would mean his life, he theorized that he could only die once in a certain span of time, so dieing twice would be irreversible. He dodged each strike and swing with difficulty but each time it got easier and easier. His style was obviously meant to kill fast and with one hit because it was predictable. With ease he was able to slip past his guard and fling him to the floor and poise a blade to his throat.

Four matches later it was Eric's turn, with structured ease his opponent was taken out with three moves. He charged and Eric stepped to the side and kicked out his legs , then he sent him hurdling to the ground with a punch. The man was dead before he reached the ground, his stomach had burst when punched.

The next round was simple Four matches with Naruto's first. His opponent was from one of the Laveatina(3) Nations. He was too uniform every move was predictable , every punch, every kick. It was only when he pulled his trench knife did he have a problem. The man was skilled in weapon usage and wasn't afraid to show it. The slashes were going were he expected them too but from no general direction. It was like he was just swinging, but he knew that wasn't true. Naruto took a risk and kicked the knife out of his hand and grabbed it poised to strike. Needless to say he won by forfeit. Eric had a little trouble with his opponent as well but was able to win without causing death.

The Semi final round bought a lot of tension, the four competitors were the best. Naruto, Eric, a badland Scavenger, and a wolf child, they were a ragtag bunch but that didn't matter. Naruto was up against the wolf child, he was strong, and fast, he could not feel pain, the boy was like an Animal, in fact he was. Fur-like hair covered most of his body, he had fangs and claws, His knees were anchored like a wolf. It scared Naruto, the mind of a wolf and a man working in harmony was something he encountered with Kiba, but this man was literally a wolf with a human mind. He wasn't sure if that was the case, after all for all he knew he was a wolf with a human body. The referee started the match and the wolf child leapt forward.

Charging like a bull the wolf-child tried to ram Naruto but was countered by a simple kick. He ducked and swiped at Naruto's foot, Naruto dashed back and the wolf charged again. This time the wolf tackled Naruto, he was thrown of easily. Suddenly the wolfs eyes began to glow, Naruto began to see double or so he thought. Each of the Dopple gangers attacked, Naruto managed to get one but was attacked from behind by another. He noticed that the dopple ganger he hit was fading away he smirked and prepared himself. Several leaped at him at once and he ducked, several collided with each other but those that got by were thrown back. Then with one last charge wolf-child tried to tackle him ;It worked and Naruto struggled to throw him off, He bit and clawed trying to chomp his neck but Naruto would not let him. He grabbed wolf-childs head and threw him to the ground and held him down and poised his blade to kill and acted.

Eric finished his match quickly, as the scavenger who was strong in his own right got here mostly on luck and was taken down with ease. The final round was a thriller Naruto vs. Eric.

"Listen Eric I'm willing to forfeit this match right now if you agree to join my little group you'll get your money and I get my friend" Naruto offered.

"No way I follow no one" Eric said.

It began as a simple exchange of punched and kicks but when Naruto pulled out a few shuriken, Eric really began showing his colors as his swings began to dent the floor when ever they were hit. The crowd roared as the home town favorite began to put the newcomer on the defensive. One punch changed the entire match, Naruto was sent flying back into the beaten pillar and hit it with great force. Naruto stood up shaking and began to dust himself off when he heard the pillar groan and give way. "Oh shit" were the only words he said as a section of the roof collapsed. He prepared himself for the pain, the cold embrace, and then new life, but none came.

Eric stood triumphantly looking at the rubble. Inside him something happened, he felt himself become aware to something, to some fact that he had not known, the fact that he had just crushed his own and possibly only friend. His face previously filled with joy and victory became sole and mournful, for he had just killed Kenny. At that moment he could swear he heard a Jewish boy far off in the distance shout "you bastard".

There was a rumbling coming from the rubble, slowly a large piece of rubble was being pushed up by some large white hand. In second it flew at Eric who dodged it narrowly, another piece was thrown and Eric caught it throwing it back to the attacker who simply crushed it. It was Naruto, his body was leaking Chakra, a lot of strange chakra, so much so that it began to take a shape.

--------------------------- WITH **JIRAYA -----------------**

Jiraya looked at the strange creature hovering above Naruto with intrest and fear, for it held qualities that he remembered well, for they were qualities his finest student told him in his final minutes.

------------------**FLASHBACK----------------------**

The forth hokage stood there on the back of Gamabunta while Jiraya stood there beside him preparing the seal array which would take the Kyuubi's soul and seal it into his godson Naruto. It was then that Minato activated the jutsu, his eyes went wide " Sensei I can see him" was all he said.

"What do you mean" Jiraya hoped Minato had not gone crazy as he was Konoha's last hope.

"I can see death, his skin is purple and glows with a dark aura, his teeth like fangs his eyes are empty and hollow from his forehead juts two large horns covered by a large untamed white mane. He carries a blade in his mouth and beads in his clawed hands"

Minato said sucking in his fear.

"Such a frightening image, a face fitting of death" was all Jiraya had too say before they began the sealing.

------------------End-----------------------------------

Jiraya looked on at the towering beast, it had a white mane which was topped by a horned animal skull that covered the eyes of its human face as it barred its mouth of razors. Its body was grey and dark with splotches of white with elongated arms and clawed hands every part thin but muscled, it was not the visage of death, but it was close.

-------------------------on the field----------------------------------------------------------

"**I will destroy you" **Was the only thing Naruto shared before charging straight at Eric.

Eric started dodging each and every blow trying to get a hit only to be blocked and thrown back. He decided to reason with his old friend "hey Kenny calm down already, I'm sorry" he said half heartedly, as most of his energy was being dedicated to saving his ass'

"**Sure now you remember"** he said sarcastically slamming his fist down shaking the ground.

"no really buddy I remember you, me ,Stan and the Jew we were all friends remember, come on you wouldn't hurt a friend" Eric pleaded.

"**Concede, and I will believe you"** Naruto said his fist poised to crush Eric.

"Fine… but your offer better still stand… I ERIC CARTMAN CONCEDE" He reluctantly shouted as the white aura around Naruto disappeared.

"We have a winner NARUTO UZUMAKI"

As the crowd celebrated the victor Eric slipped into the back round.

* * *

It was nearing nightfall, Naruto and the others were about to set off having a long journey ahead of them. Naruto was looking out over the field from the top of his new caravan. He looked down in dismay "Come on Naruto he's not coming" Kin said while rubbing his shoulders.

"Who's not coming" Everybody turned their heads towards the voice, It was Eric "I hope your offer still stands" He said reaching out a hand.

Naruto stared at him before he smiled " I'll always have a place for my friends" Naruto reached out and shook his hand.

Eric climbed up and slung his bag onto the carridge "So were we headed to"

Naruto looked at his new map "well from this bad lands map I'd say were heading to the valley of sema and then to the tunnel of god, and finally we'll head back to konoha through the divided kingdom"

Eric thought about the travel plan and then figured it out "those places are were we'll find the others right"

Naruto grinned at him "You bet"

The Eric started to grin "I can't wait to beat Kyle's jew ass"

END CHAPTER 4

Yes Cartman will say a lot of racist things but only when it makes sense...maybe

(1)Capatasim-this is a nation with a very American culture, ran with a similar government their leader is always getting into serious problemms

(2)Dimbala- a Nation with a heavy influence of African culture they have no boundaries within their nation but do have territorial tribes

(3)Laveatina- a European like Nation… that's all I can say is you probably get the gist of this by now

heres a bit of news for people who want to see funny deaths, well i wrote several chapters ahead as to be able to make the chapters at an easier pace. So unfortunately until chapter seven there won't be a "funny death"


	5. In the valley a subplot revealed

**DEAD MAN STILL WALKS**

**Chapter 5: The Menorah of Semi Valley( A subplot revealed)**

All three men walked along side the Caravan as the lone women of the group slept inside. Kin was not a morning person, especially after a strenuous night, and demand they let her sleep, so instead of waiting around they put her in the carriage and went on their way. Cartman was looking over the map feverously trying to figure out anything about these places. His face light up in realization "We're going to Jew canyon, why didn't you tell me ,I hate Jews, especially Kyle" he said shifting his eyes when he said Kyle's name.

"Dude I thought you knew that Semi stood for Semite as in Jewish people, besides I heard that there is a genius weapons smith's apprentice who lives in the valley and can build any weapon and I'm trying to get some special shuriken" Naruto said glancing over at Cartman.

"Yeah yeah just don't expect me to be nice" He said grudgingly.

Naruto smirked "I don't, I expect you to be quite"

Eric just looked on before snapping back "Hey"

Naruto began laughing as Eric shouted at him which woke up Kin who glared an evil glare "BE QUITE I'M TRYING TO SLEEP" she shouted before relaxing again.

Both of them we're too scared to talk and their skin seemed to be shocked pale. Jiraya silently laughed at the boys predicament before going back to his own, the flexible . "Hey asshole stop daydreaming about my mom" was the only thing he heard before being hit over the head.

"Now we have about 3 miles till we reach the bridge, we're going to find a place to stay in town then we'll visit this black smith" Naruto said as Eric threw the unconscious pervert into the wagon.

It was a long walk that took them a few hours and brought them past many sights. The rivers and cliffs that dotted the side of the betrayed the dangerous lawlessness of the land. Kin had woken up as they passed a waterfall and was immeadatially begging Naruto if they could stop for a swim. He accepted as he swam while watching kin enjoy herself. They set off an hour later almost to there destination, the closer they got the more spread the trees got until they reached a strange bridge. It amazed them easily and was a wondrous sight. Streaming from the bridge were ramps up and down, towers and boardwalks, it was literally as if they decided to build a city in the valley it self all centered on the bridge which it was. Of course there were places set on the valleys edge but the city was mainly focused in the valley. The carriage was guided to a hotel where the horse was stabled and the caravan unloaded.

"Hey guys I'm going to go look around" said Cartman as he wandered down one of the many ramps and platforms that make the city.

"Don't get lost" shouted Naruto as he and Kin took all the valuables from the wagon and carried them to the rooms.

"well I hope the fat idiot does" kin scorned

"HEY" Cartman voice came carrying through the streets.

Kin just stood and blinked before Naruto turned to her "He's got good hearing"

"DAMN STRAIGHT"

**_____________________________1 hour later---------------------------**

Cartman stood at what was apparently the city's boundaries on its east side as the only thing really there was a few shops and a long walkway leading out of the city and into the valley. He knew he was at the lowest level because he could hear the water rushing underneath the boardwalk clearly, and if he looked over the edge he would see the water 10 feet below the railing. The long walk way extend out for about what seemed to be a quarter of a mile before it reached what looked like another valley city but smaller.

Eric was curious and treaded down the path to this other city, it took him about ten minutes to get there. He discovered that the town instead of a bridge was on a train station. The town was fairly small mostly being comprised of tourist shops and restaurants, but their were a few homes there as well. Here he learned of a grand plan to unite the corners of the globe through a system of trains. Currently they we're working into the Godia trying to interconnect the cities but local Ninja kept destroying them fearing their enemies or the outsiders using them to transport large numbers of troops into their cities. Cartman didn't really care for the project but instead looked around some more before running across a weapons shop. He walked in and immeadatially he saw a pair of claws that would be perfect, he pulled out his wallet and headed for the counter. "Hey how much for the set of claws ?" Eric said reaching into his wallet to pull out some coins.

The boy behind the counter never turned around to look at him " that would be four hundred gold pieces for the set" the boy continued to tinker with some strange blade.

Eric was appalled at the price "What the hell are you trying to Jew me out of my money Jewbag" He accused.

The boy slammed his hands on the table and turned around "Listen here fat boy don't come into my shop and start insulting me and calling my prices outrageous "

"HEY DON"T CALL ME FAT, JEW"

"DON"T BE:LITTLE MY PEOPLE FATASS"

"GOLD HORDER"

"BLUBBERBUTT"

"ATTIC RAT"

"MAN BOOBS"

"NAZI BAIT"

"YOU WENT TO FAR ,MAN ,TO FAR" The other boy leapt across the counter and tried to strangle Cartman.

They rolled across the floor fighting as a younger boy stood at the back door from behind the counter looking at them brawl. The young boy sighed as he went back into the backroom intent on ignoring the fight.

-----------------------------------With Kin and Naruto---------------------------------------------

"where is fatty we need to start looking for the blacksmith and with him we'll cover more ground" Kin stated as they walked through town having left the still unconscious pervert in the caravan.

"Yeah, your right we should have told him to wait…well the best thing to do would be to ask around" Said Naruto as he walked off dragging Kin along as they asked about this famous blacksmith.

Each person they talked to mentioned the train station outpost about a quarter of a mile away from the city. When they asked where the outpost was all they did was tell them to go to the lowest point of the city before walking off mumbling about tourist. They looked for tunnels or tracks that could lead them to the city with very little luck. It was only after about an hour of searching did they come across the long walkway. They looked over the railing and saw that the water was 11 feet below their heads. The rushing water was loud and frightening, It made Naruto wonder why had these people built an entire city in a valley over a rushing river and more importantly how. The speed of the river made it far to dangerous to go down and plant support beams in the ground, and yet they had.

Putting their thoughts aside they set out down the bridge and arrived in the small outposted town. The bridge in the middle was covered in train tracks with people waiting all around for the next train. The town was obviously built for travelers as the shops closest to the tracks were all tourist shops and the next were all hotels. The town was a marvel of building like its city counter part but was obvious by how construction of another bridge between the two, that these people were determined to become a major hub on every map. The two wandered around the small town until they found the shop. They were about to go n when two people crashed through the window in a brawl. Unfortunately Naruto recognized one "CARTMAN I thought I told you to try and be polite" he said in exasperation pulling his buddy from the tussle.

"But he tried to Jew me out of my money" He shouted, typical of Eric.

Naruto turned to the person Cartman had offened. The boy was about their height with an average build, his hands were covered with cuts and scars form long hours of working. He wore a pair of blue track pants with an orange vest and a green hat. "I'm sorry…" Naruto said trying to apologize.

"Kyle Broflowski" Was all the boy said.

"Kyle Broflowski, my friend here is prone to stereotype people without notice and…"Naruto paused looking back at the shop then to the boy "Wait Kyle Broflowski, one of the villages prided blacksmith and the best this side of the badlands"

The boy gleamed with pride "Not only that I'm the best swordsman in all of the towns of semi valley"

This proclamation confused the others so Kyle went on to explain that the valley of semi extended on for about forty miles from the point the valley starts at the falls of the divided kingdom. Every few miles there is a towering city built around a bridge numbering ten in all, and in each city there is a blacksmith that helps the town build. Every fifty years the ten blacksmiths gather at some hidden dam and stop the river so they can expand the cities or even found a new one. Each black smith owns a key , except for him, because someone had stolen his masters key and killed him. The swarm of information made their heads turn, but they were able to understand.

"So Kyle I was wondering if you could build this weapon I need, I would try it my self but I'm to busy trying to keep these two under control" Naruto said handing the plans to Kyle and pointing to the two people behind him.

"Hey" Kin and Eric shouted.

Kyle looked over the plans thoroughly before saying anything "I can make it" NAruto started jumping for joy "But unfortunately I don't have the time" His jumping stopped.

"Why not?" Naruto said glaring at kyle.

"Because right now I'm working on my newest creation, I call it the menorah" Kyle said as he walked into his shop and picked up the strange blade.

"Seriously?" Naruto really questioned the name" Why do you call it the menorah?"

" I don't have to tell you" Kyle said placing the blade back on the table "Besides I have to go down to the dam and check the system the water levels have been rising and falling like crazy, just the other day the water dropped down to three feet and then flooded the lower half of the villages"

Kin stepped forward "If theres anything we can do to help"

Kyle just turned around and glared "You can help by taking your anti-Semite friend and leaving"

The group left the store dejecting as they headed for the walkway. Naruto couldn't get the name of the blacksmith off his mind 'Kyle Broflowski why does that name seem so familiar, sure he is widely known blacksmith but I feel like I know that name from somewhere else'

-----------------------------------The next day--------------------------------------------

Kyle stood outside of the damn control system station, what ever was going on this place would show some answers. He pulled out a key to un lock the door but when he tried to open it he slipped and forced the door open. It just glided open like there was no lock, and in fact the door wasn't locked. He walked in cautiously looking out for any danger before the door slammed shut behind him.

"Hello…" He called out.

There was no answer so he called out again "Helloo… anybody here"

Kyle pulled out a flashlight and started looking for the light switch. He walked down the corridor flashing the light on the walls every few feet trying to find the switch. "Ahh finally" Kyle said as flipped a power breaker turning on the corridor lights.

Pipes lined the grey walls crossing back and forth the hiss of stem from the various pipes bursting forth. As Kyle passed a connecter a large plum of stem erupted. Kyle jumped turning around. Behind him a shadow crossed through the dimly light corridor. Kyle calmed down and turned around as another passed behind him. The light bulbs that hung from the ceiling swayed as the pipes rumbled from the water passing through them. Kyle reached into his back pocket and pulled out a map. "Lets see the power control room is too the …right up ahead and the breaker is in a small pocket to the left on that hall… then the main control passed two halls and then to the left" Kyle said as he examined the map "man its hot in here" Kyle said using his hat to fan himself.

Fixing his hat he proceeded towards the main control room, he had this shaking feeling that there was someone else here. Walking into the room he tried flipping the breaker but was unsuccessful in geeting any power the room was still dark. He saw a chair turned towards the closed window that overlooked the valley. He walked up towards it and turned it around with a sword at the ready. In the chair sat his fellow blacksmith Tom his body riddled with daggers. "Oh My God" Kyle said as he backed up only to run into someone.

He turned around and saw a large man carrying an Axe raised above his head. The axe came down intent on splitting kyle's head but Kyle ducked and swung the blade at the mans feet, smoothly slicing through him before kicking him onto his back and stabbing his heart. "What's going on here?" Kyle asked himself as he headed toward the power station to see what was going on with the lights.

He treaded carefully down the halls turning left into the hall, he slowly approached the hall to see a grey being with large black eyes standing there drawing power from the generator. "Who are you" Kyle shouted

The being looked at him, right in the eye turning back to his work of drawing energy from the generator. "I SAID WHO ARE YOU" Kyle shouted again.

This time the being didn't ignore him. He turned around and began to approach kyle menacingly and said "You're interfering with greatness human"

-------------------------In town---------------------------------------------

Naruto, Kin, Jiraya and Cartman were packing up the caravan for a long journey before a young boy came running up to them. "Hey your were the people that visited my brother Kyle right" Said the strange young boy with the shaved head.

"Yeah what of it kid" Shouted Cartman.

"Something's happening the water level dropped to one foot a while after Kyle left and there have been reports of rolling blackouts the power plant in the dam isn't putting out enough power and I think Kyle may be caught in the middle of something" Said the boy.

Naruto was looking out over the edge of the bridge and saw that the water had dropped drastically as he could see various rock and others things at the bottom of the valley. He looked further down the valley to see a large army of Barbarians charging towards the city "Guys I think something big is going down"

Jiraya looked over the edge to see the approaching enemy he focused his sight and was able to pick up the many things they carried which included axes and explosives. His eyes widened from the realization of the army's purpose, if they destroyed the city of Sema then all the other cities would be dragged into the water by the flood of debris when it headed down water. He turned to the young boy "what's your name brat" he asked.

"Ike sir" the boy stated.

"Well Ike gather every capable fighter in this city and tell them an army is charging down the weakened rivers path from the north and to meet at the north dock" said Jiraya.

He stood watching at the boys retreating form before turning towards the three Teens behind him " Naruto,Eric we're going to attack the enemy head on to stall them, while you kin go and try assist Kyle at the dam you got that"

"YES SIR" shouted the three teams as they rushed off towards their battle stations.

Jiraya turned his head towards the sky "God help us"

Nartuo and Cartman leaped into the valley and ready them selves to attack the enemy , that was before they saw the large beast that they saw following the group. "Don't worry boys me and gamashi here got that thing back there" Said Jiraya on the back of a giant toad.

Naruto looked Jiraya straight in the eye and said "You are so gonna teach me that when this is over"

Cartman looked at all the people charging at him and grinned "Oh ya time to smash some faces" he said as he readied his fists.

---------------------------at the dam--------------------------

The large being just stood there continuing to draw energy from the generator. "I'll repeat who are you" Said kyle as he drew his weapon preparing to attack.

"That is simple I am Cylar 117 one of thirty generals for the invasion of earth we wish to conquer this planet and we have chosen the perfect point of operation, however your cities stood in the way, it was easy to figure out how to destroy them, the tricky part was putting it into action" Said Cylar.

"Wait what do you mean stood and why do you want earth" Kyle said

"It's simple, earth is the perfect environment for the alliance of the fifteen war species as well as a perfect base of operations for conquering the earth, however with your complicated systems of governments it would be impossible to take over without gaining a large number of your people under our thumb so we plotted our takeover carefully, but you have interfered so I must kill you" Cylar explained as he moved closer and closer towards the boy "The barbarian horde we seized control of will destroy your city setting of a domino effect destroying all life in the valley of sema" Cylar lifted his palm with was teaming with energy and fired.

Kyle jumped out of the way but all that was left of the floor it hit was a pile of dust. "I was tasked with finding a place to hide our troops and power our weapons, I have succeeded and no one will take this victory from me when its so close" Cylar projected as he proceeded to try and blast Kyle again and again.

----------------------------------in The valley-----------------------------

Naruto, Jiraya, and Cartman stood sounded by fallen bodies as more attacked. It seemed there was no end to the enemies numbers and it was starting to look bad. Naruto had already used his 'Catalyst mode' and ran out, Cartman was starting to tire and Jiraya was running low on chakra. All hope seemed lost before a tidal wave of arrows swept through the sky and into the hearts of the barbarian horde. As the enemies fell wave after wave the trio stood looking at the cliff sides with awe. It was as if every person in sema with a bow had came out to help.

"Hey Old man I got every one I could is this enough" Shouted Ike from the valley wall.

"More then enough squirt, more than enough" Jiraya shouted back as he watched his enemies fall.

With the sky raining death it wasn't long before the horde was all dead. Jiraya burned the bodies and set their ashes to the wind and water leaving only the discard weapons around them as proof of the battle. One of which caught Eric's eye a pair of Expertly crafted battle axes. The Archers descended the wall to quickly pull the weapons from the water to make sure they did no harm to their village.

"I hope Kin is doing well" Naruto hoped as he rushed towards the dam.

------------------------------------------Power room------------------------------------

Kyle dodged blast after blast and was starting to tire, Cylar stood a few feet in front of him another beam charging "good bye human you've put up a good fight, lets just hope the Barbarians were as good as you"

Just as Cylar was about to fire a senbon pierced his shoulder causing it to lash out and fire the beam which sent debris falling and burying him. Kyle turned around to see who threw the needle "Come on hurry" shouted kin.

Kyle took off down the hallway, but stopped when he noticed the pile of rubble glowing. He panicked and dashed down the hallway grabbed Kin's shoulder and dragged her around the corner. Another energy beam ripped through the hallway putting a huge crater in the wall. "I will get you human" Shouted the angry Cylar as he stromed down the hall the wind stinging his bruises and cuts from the rubble.

"Come on I got a plan" Kyle said as he dragged Kin down the halls rushing.

It didn't take Kyle long to find what he was looking for "Quickly turn that valve"

Kin did as she was told and Kyle cut into the pipe and bent it out facing the center of the hall. Kin looked at the pipe and was shocked to see it was a gas line. Kyle pulled out that sword he called the menorah and pressed a button. Suddenly eight small flames burst from the back of the blade and by pulling a trigger the entire blade turned into a torch. Kyle turned toward Kin and looked her in the eyes "When I say now turn the gas back on" Kyle said sternly to which Kin only nodded.

Cylar's angry roaring and heavy steps echoed through the corridors. With each one he got closer and closer, Kin was really hoping the plan would work. Cylar stepped in front of the hallway and turned towards them. An Evil gleam entered his eye as he charged for them arm raised brimming with energy. But before he could kyle shouted "Now"

A wall of fire came rushing at Cylar roasting the war mongering being burning off every inch of skin and flesh of his hollow crystal bones.

-------------------------------------The next day------------------------------

With the dam fixed and every one getting out unscaved, it had came time for Naruto and his crew to leave so with their caravan packed they were about to be on their way.

"Hey wait up guys" Yelled Kyle.

"What is it Kyle" asked Naruto

"I'm coming with you kenny" Kyle said a clever smirk on his face.

"How did you know…"Naruto asked amazed at the blacksmiths strange proclomation.

"Come on I've been remembering you guys for a while now Don't you remember we used to be friends" Kyle said waving his arms

"KYLE" Naruto and Cartman exclaimed at the revelation of an old aquantince.

"Took you that long to realize it" He said as his own Caravan pulled up beside him with Ike driving the ox.

"Wait your leaving the city of Sema" Asked Kin who poked her head out from the caravan.

"Yeah , theres nothing left for me and Ike here, I need to learn more about weapons and smithing, I need to become the best and I can't do that If I don't travel, so when you guys passed through town I figured it I could travel with you guys and learn from people in the towns we stop by" Kyle explained as the group began to leave the valleys area.

"Well welcome to the group Kyle" said Jiraya as he walked along side the caravan.

"Next stop the Tunnel of god" Shouted Naruto as he lead the group to their next destination.

"Finally We're leaving Jew Ville" Said Cartman as he sighed a breathe of releif.

"What Did you say Fatass" Kyle shouted.

"OHH ITS ON JEW BOY" Eric shouted as he tackled Kyle.

Naruto just shook his head and laughed "Just like old times".

END CHAPTER 5

Must read very impotrant

** Hello my readers, I really hope you're enjoying the story. If so I thank you, and I've notice thanks to my reviews, though very little, most like the story because the idea the plot is based on is so original. So if any of you are interested in writing a story based on some other idea I've got then go ahead, here's my idea: **

**It starts out at the beginning of the series when Naruto is learning the shadow clone. As he is searching it for a second jutsu to learn he finds a little hand shaped array at the center of the scroll. Naruto then activates the seal which turns out to be a fail safe in case it was stolen. Now Naruto has to go threw his ninja career with the entire list of jutsu's and village secrets from the scroll tattooed onto his person, all the while dodging his jutsu hungry allies, kunoichi from enemy villages, and the temptation to use the jutsu now embedded into his skin. Refrain from using Naru/saku , Naruto/Tsunade or, if you can't think of an original way for them to get together, Naru/hina. It's just a major pet peeve of mine, sorry. Harem is aloud but not with any of those listed sbove because hinata's from a powerful family and would most likely think it improper, sakura doesn't seem like the type to share, and tsunade for obvious reasons **

**So what do you think the idea is open to anyone willing to try! I would write it myself but I've got this story to write so….yeah. If you want advice on how to do that just drop me a line (E-mail me for those that don't get it) because I know how.**


	6. Chapter 6

**DEAD MAN WALKING**

**Chapter 6 : IN THE EYE OF LOVE'S STORM**

Our group of travelers traversed the rocky road that lead to the plateau known as the tunnel of god. Not being familiar with the Badlands Naruto and Kin didn't know why they called it the tunnel of god., so they asked Kyle and Cartman. "Hey guys why do they call it the tunnel of god" Asked Kin as she kept the caravan on route.

"Its actually kinda complicated… hey Kenny can I see the map" Shouted Kyle as he steered his covered wagon.

"Okay Kyle but my name is Naruto now" Kenny/Naruto explained as he pulled out the map.

"Sure what ever you say man but what I don't get is why you're the only one who lives a life remotely like his old one while having a different name while the rest of us have the same names and entirely different lives" Cartman said as he walked along side Kyle's wagon , waiting for a chance to goad him.

"Lets put that aside for later…" Kyle said as he unfurled the map and laid it out "So you guys know that big thick circle around the village on the map right" Kyle asked pointing to the land mark.

"Yeah"

"Well it's a giant endless hurricane that the village people sustain through the use of a wind maiden, no one outside the village knows how but most don't want to know because they think their barbaric cannibals, mostly because there is no known way for anybody to get in or out" Kyle explained.

"Well 'great and fearless leader' with that plan thrown out how are we getting home cause as far as I know your entire trip depended on cutting through the tunnel of god" Said Cartman.

"Stop calling me that besides isn't there a village around it" Naruto said as he socked Eric in the shoulder.

Kyle looked at the map flipping it every which way he could "Yeah it looks like it but it seems like a gate community"

Eric, Ike, and Naruto all looked at Kyle strangely "Gate community?"

Kyle held up the map pointing to the tunnel of god "Apparently the hurricane is surrounding a place called the temple of wind which is a giant palace that is home to the wind priestess, the palace serves as a fortress only opening the giant steel gates during a state of emergency , the surrounding community all live their for protection and a chance to be admitted into the palace, the main appeal to any guy is that every ten years there is a chance for them to wed the wind priestess by winning the tournament of ten days" He explained pointing to the giant temple like structure in the center of the white ring.

"Why every ten years?" Asked Ike poking his head out from the caravans wagon. "Because the hurricane ends once every ten, and every ten years a new wind priestess is chosen, and once a new priestess is chosen at the hurricane returns" Kyle continued on "And it seems as if we're in luck because the tournament of ten days is going on right now and is finishing up, if were lucky we could get to see the next wind priestess take her spot" Kyle finished up as he rolled up the map and stowed it away.

Cartman was the first to notice something strange "Have you guys ever noticed that we're always getting to places at moments like these and then we get in some fucked up adventure"

Naruto didn't even turn around and answered "Yes we have , we just try and ignore it"

* * *

**UnKnown Location**

Twenty-nine figures sat around a chrome table , an empty chair was situated at one end.

"Cylar 117 was a fool, he overestimated his capability and did not plan ahead" said one of the figures sporting a bulbous head.

"I think we should try and take the valley again , it is a valuable location" Shouted a towering figure that had seemed to have no head.

"No" stated a grey figure dawing attention to himself " If we tried to take sema valley we would be noticed, it is an international trading hub, the humans would try and fight back" The grey figure looked strikingly similar to Cylar " A futile effort, but we would undoubtedly loose much need troops and even risk loosing another general, After all if both selected generals die then their people leave the alliance"

Another giant figure slammed its hands into the table denting it "I tire of this bureaucracy, why do we not just bombard the planet from orbit, they have no defense against it"

A four armed being started to convulse and speak rapidly "You fool, you know that while our alliance and our operations are legal by galactic law it could all be destroyed by one such act, the galactic fleet would be on us in a second and we cannot risk loosing any troops before we take all important facilitated planets"

The giant grunted "You too'nari and your smart mouths I should silence you all"

Suddenly a large clunky figure stood " Calm yourself comrades, I believe I know what to do allow me to lead the next seige"

A cloaked shadow at the end of the table looked at the thing "Very well please explain your plan"

"Thank you grand master" The beast then began to explain its plan

* * *

**In the village**

While Jiraya and Ike tied up the horses and stored the caravans, Cartman and Kyle went off to stock up on supplies insulting each other the entire way. Naruto and Kin went off to explore the town, and to see the festivities.

The entire town was covered in banners and lanterns celebrating the grand festival of wind as it was apparently called. The town seemed to have people who greatly desired to be brought into the palace of wind, which loomed overhead with it large central tower covering the setting sun. As Kin and Naruto walked down one of the many streets clamoring with adults walking drunkenly, children laughing and running, young couples kissing. As the skies began to grey the lanterns magically came to life. As they continued down the street they came across a large ring, from the blood scattered on the dirt in it any expert could determine it was a fighting ring. A small group of people entered the area from a stair case descending from a building , which most likely doubled as a bleacher. It was a group of five men, two looked to be everyday brawlers, one seemed to be a scholar, one was obviously an announcer and the other was hard to place, but you could tell by the look on his face that he was a man with a mission.

"Welcome one and all to the sixth day of combat in the Gale tournament, once again the Gale village would like to extend its gratitude to all the people who have come to see this years festivities" Shouted the announcer as he motioned toward the four fighters

"These four young men are all fighting for the beautiful wind maiden's hand, the winner will wed the woman on the ninth day, and then, as you all know, a new maiden will be chosen before the hurricane reappears and in Ten years it begins again" At his words the crowd cheered , the celebration of wind was a prominent event for the town "Now will Gregory and Yoshima please step into the ring" said the man.

The scholar stepped down from the bleachers as did the brawler Yoshima. Gregory seemed to carry himself astutely , his manner of dress indicated he was well educated, something uncommon in the badlands, and very wealthy, however the way he moved his right arm was strange. Even through the cloth robe Naruto could see that his arm was coiled like snake and ready to strike like a piston, the way he kept his wrist stiff and arm straight indicated something, a hidden weapon perhaps Naruto didn't know. All the while Yoshima was a brute with hulking muscles on every inch, his fists and wrists were wrapped tightly to protect his hands. Tatoos covered his arms almost completely , each seemed to tell another tell of arrogance, deceit, and brutality. The referee called the match to a start. Yoshima pranced around his opponent jumping up and down on the balls of his feet "So you little shit think you're a big dog huh, well let me tell you something I have never lost a brawl" Yoshima said as he swung a hook.

"Thankfully you'll never have too" Said Gregory as he ducked to the side "But unfortunately this isn't a brawl I never intended to hit" A blade dropped from Gregory's sleeve and with a smooth motion he put a cut in Yoshima's arm "I intended to cut you into little pieces , this was never a brawl Yoshima, and sadly you'll never beat me"

"SHUT UP" Yoshima shouted as he swung to knock the punk's head off.

However with a duck and a spin Gregory dodged the hit and sliced at Yoshima's legs. He fell to the ground with a thud; luckily he was still alive. "Ready to forfeit the match" he calmly stated.

"NEVER" shouted Yoshima as he tried to climb on to his feet only to be killed by Gregory's blade.

"he was a fool to try and stand up to me" Gregory said walking off the field.

The crowd cheered and booed more specifically the gang that supported Yoshima. As people dragged Yoshima's lifeless corpse off the field the annoucer walked out onto the field again as the last two competitors stepped out onto field behind him. "And now for the final fight of tonight's tourney is Stan Marsh and Gikodo"

The two stepped forward onto the field an took their spots. Both looked very much like common brawlers except for a key difference. The teen in the strange cap had strained arms, like his muscles were constantly twitching, he was experienced in combat. The other was strong but only strong, his muscles were not tensed but relaxed and his stance was incorrect… all in all he was merely a heavy hitter who had either gotten lucky and got chump enemies, or this Stan and Gregory were the only real trained fighters in the tournament. Naruto noticed that the same Tattoos that covered Yoshima's arms were also on Gikodo's; perhaps they were clan markings after all Yoshima and Gikodo's family names were never announced ,but then neither was Gregory's.

The boy in the blue gi and grey pants entered with a hard left hook which sent Gikodo to the floor. However Gikodo was Agile and managed to turn the moment to try and kick him. Stan brought up one arm and used the other to catch his legs and flung him t o the other side of the ring. Stan stood there waiting for Gikodo to stand, for he fought for a purpose with purpose ; he was a fighter not a soldier his goal was not to kill his enemy like his, will be next, opponent had his.

As Naruto and Kin watched the match Cartman and Kyle had found them and watched it with them as well. They bickered every few moments but would ignore their argument to enjoy the show. As the fight went on Naruto contemplated the name Stan Marsh; it sounded very familiar, and he knew it was from his past life, but from were…

Then it hit him, Stan one of the four in the most notaries group in south park( mainly because of all the hi-jinks they got into) along with Kyle, Cartman, and himself .

Stan attacked his enemy ferociously as soon as he stood up pounding him relentlessly breaking through guard after guard before Gikodo fell to the ground limp as a rag doll.

Two men leapt on to the field and dragged his blood soaked body off the ground as the announcer held up Stan's arm "And the person who will fight Gregory for the wind maiden's hand is Stan Marsh" The crowd cheered, he was an obvious crowd favorite.

Stan walked off the field of battle walking towards a street before he heard "Hey Stan wait up" from behind.

Turning around he saw some expected friends "Oh it's about time you guys got here"

* * *

After meeting Stan he guided them to his home which looked like a dojo in the main room, which made sense because he was constantly training for the past ten years. You see when the last wind maiden was chosen they selected the young Wendy Testaburger to be the next. The two were torn away from each other at that moment , and it was then Stan promised her that he would win the tournament of ten days for her. That was the same day he was woken and started refining the various bits of martial arts he knew to create his own fighting style. The bits of martial arts he knew all came from the various Martial art fads that came and went when they were kids which included Ti-quon-do. Karate, Jujitsu, Judo, Yoga, Caporia, heck they even knew some grappling techniques from when the tried wrestling. Granted they weren't their favorite techniques but for a whole bunch of gay moves they sure could help you cause some damage.

Every year Stan since then entered the priestesses tourney in which matches were held for the wind priestesses enjoyment on her birthday. During them He would sneak away to see and talk to Wendy. Unfortunately every spar he had fought against the other finalist Gregory ended with his lost. He was mad and he had a way to beat him this year, unfortunately this year was serious and Gregory took full advantage of the allowed killing. "So You have to beat Gregory to get Wendy's hand and then you can leave?" Kyle asked as he scratched his head.

"Yes but I need a way to beat those blades of his" Stan shouted as he slammed his fist on the table.

"QUIET DWEEBS I'm TRYING TO GET SOME SLEEP" came an angry shout from his sister shelly.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP SHELLY" Stan yelled there was no response.

"You could use these" Naruot said holding up to wrist mounted blades that could pop out "This will definitely block his swords and you can retract them by making a fist so you can punch him too" Naruto said as he pulled out the blades from his bag.

Stan just looked at the blades, he didn't know where Kenny got them from or who but it didn't matter, because no matter what happened the next day Wendy would be his.

* * *

It was the final day of the tournament and out on the balcony stood the wind maiden with long flowing black hair and purple robes. She looked out over the competing field were Stan and Gregory stood ready for combat.. She looked intently at Stan and memories of this life and past flooded through her mind. A tear made its way down her cheek because either way Stan escaped this death match his life and hers would be different.

The gang sat in the stands watching the glaring contest between Stan and Gregory as did the entire crowd. Not one man saw the threat that loomed above and waited to strike.

The crowd around the two competitors roared with excitement. The announcer began the fight and Stan charged head first with a punch. Gregory simply smirked and swiped down with his blade falling from his sleeve to chop off his head. It came as no surprise to the group that Gregory was stunned when Stan maneuvered and kicked him in the head sending him across the ring. Stan righted himself and prepared for Gregory's retaliation. from the ground he quickly rose and swung low to strike his feet. Stan then released the wrist blades and blocked the swing. "YEAH, WAY TO GO STAN" Shouted Naruto, Kyle and Eric.

Stan smirked and knocked the blades away and swiped at his arms making shallow cuts on Gregory's arms. Gregory responded likewise but failed. Stan was toying with him, allowing him to try and strike only for Stan to block and turn the attack away before giving him his own shallow cuts. Gregory was getting furious, he was a great scholar and an equally great fighter how dare this uneducated commoner treat him as such. Gregory's normally calm façade broke as he swung madly at Stan. Stan managed to hold him off before kicking him back. Gregory only continued and Stan so no other way to end this. From the stories of these tournaments that his father told him the last two always fought to the death. Their will to get what they wanted was that strong that they wouldn't give up even if they couldn't breathe anymore, to end it death was the only way. As Gregory charged to bring his blades down on his head Stan blocked and then threw Gregory's arms to the side before he stabbed him repeatedly in the chest. Gregory fell to the ground dead. The crowd fell with silence before it broke out into glorious cheers. The balcony all of a sudden began to recede into the overlooking tower as a stair case revealed itself underneath it. At the top of the stairs stood Wendy who was flanked by guard on either side of her. The announcer ran over to stand and walked him over to the stair case. When both Wendy and Stan stood at the bottom of the steps the announcer proclaimed "STAN MARSH YOU HAVE EMERGED VICTIOURS FROM THE TEN DAYS TOURNAMENT LIKE ANY MAN WHO HAS PROVEN HIMSELF IN THESE TRIAL YOU HAVE EMERGED WED, MAY BOTH YOU AND OUR LOVELY MAIDEN OF WIND REMAIN HAPPY FOR THE REST OF YOUR DAYS".

Fire works flew into the sky at this proclamation of marriage. Spectarors through out the stands chanted "Kiss her, Kiss her" in an attempt to make Stan to do so in front of the entire town, and he did so. Wendy smiled a the thought that she was now reunited with the one she loved. "I missed you Stan" she said wispily.

"And I missed you too Wendy" Stan returned as they kissed deeply.

Naruto was clapping like the rest of the crowd a the happy couples reunion and joining. He looked up and saw a dark ominous cloud, or what he though was one.

* * *

It was the Tenth and final day and people paraded through the streets following the wind priestess, her guards, and her new husband towards the new wind priestess. Naruto and Kin were in the back of the march while Kyle and Cartman stood at the front throwing insults back and forth. All four them were keeping watch for something out of the ordinary. The group cheered as they approached the town hall were their stood many young women of many different ages all dressed appropriately for the occasion.

Wendy looked at each of them and closed her eyes. The wind began to guide her steps. with each one she grew closer to one shy girl who was hiding behind one of the "larger" little girls. Wendy guided her forward and looked right into her eyes and smiled. The little girl's eyes grew wide with wonder and her smile shone with happiness. Wendy instructed her guards to go to their new charge, the new wind maiden. The crowd cheered as she was guided toward the temple. Once she took her steps into the temples tower the hurricane would reappear and signal a new era for their village. The town then paraded towards the temple as they parted for the little girl.

However not every one was enjoying the parade, several men were out in the grave yard about to bury the body of Gregory. They threw his body into the hole and began to shovel in the soil that would cover him. He was being thrown into the field of warriors that was said to emit a powerful presence that imbued any man who trained there with the power of the fallen that forever rested there. Just as they were about to dump the soil into the hole they had dug a pair of hands grabbed the shovels and pulled them in while another body jumped out. he reached into the grave and removed one of the unconscious men's garments before putting them on himself. He eyed the outfit before deciding that it would do for now. He wore a strange vest with a pair of green pants tucked into the boots. He was about to put on the shirt before he took off the vest and threw t into the grave with the others. He reached in and pulled out to magnificently crafted scimitars and attached them to his belt. He threw on a light orange button up shirt and tucked it into his shirt while rolling up the sleeves and putting on a pair of work gloves. He tossed a tattered elegant cloak over his shoulder before he buried the unconscious men alive. He slicked back his platinum blonde hair before smirking and walking off. "Oh you can have your days in the sun Stanley but I hope you don't get lazy with your newfound marital bliss after all I will find you and I will kill you for taking my woman but all in due time friend, all in due time "Said Gregory as he walked off into the sunset.

The citizens stood patiently awaiting the new tunnel of winds to appear. The winds began to rise and focus around the temple and the crowd watched in wonder as a brilliant light circled the temples highest tower and then burst out where the winds then followed gathering around the path the light had set for them. The wind grew so intense you could only see a spiraling wall of white. The crowd cheered wildly as did Wendy, Stand, Kyle, Cartman, Kin and Naruto. The power was so great and fearful that it protected the citizens.

After the celebrating calmed down the gang went to a little tea shop to discuss their plans. "So are you guys going to join us or what?" Cartman asked plainly before Naruto could speak.

The couple just laughed "Yes we will" they said in unison before Stan went on "I managed to get my self a wagon to keep some of my gear in for the trip, we really want to see the elemental nations' he finished.

Kyle however was detached from the conversation as he saw something familiar hanging on the wall and a cloaked figure approaching it. "Hey guys isn't that the Diamond of Panthyos that Barbra Streisand tried to use to rule the world or something"

The others all looked toward the sculpture which had a dragon holding the diamond against its chest all of them went wide eyed "Well I be it is" they said.

"what's that guy doing" Asked Wendy pointing at the man who was reaching for the diamond.

"Oh no that's no man that's Barbra Streisand " Screamed Cartman.

The person turned around to reveal a very old Barbra with cybernetic limbs and body parts. "YES IT IS I THE MAGNIFECNT BARBRA STREISAND , AND WITH THE DIAMOND OF PANTHYOS I CAN FINALLY REGAIN MY BEAUTY, MY YOUTH AND MY POWER AND THERIS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME. YOU BRATS " She shouted at the top of her lungs before running off.

The group just stared wide eyed at what just happened. "what in the world is going on didn't she blow up" said Stan as the group got up from their table to chase her.

"Yeah and I died from playing tetherball that day too remember bu the next day I was at the bus stop" Naruto said as the group ran towards Barbra who was fleeing to the temple.

Wendy noticed and panicked "We have to hurry if she activates it in the temple then she could control the hurricane" the group immeadatially picked up the pace.

Barbra put up quiet a chase but in the end was caught. They tried taking the diamond from her but she then shouted the magic words and started laughing "I will destroy you all"

Slowly she turned into mecha-Streisand the same on that ravaged the town of south park. She toppled buildings and towers as she made her way through the city. The could only star at the rampart destruction. "We have to do something" Kyle said as he started flipping through a book of weapons he had sealed away.

"I have one idea but…." Naruto said immediately every one was looking at him "I lack the energy to use it properly".

Wendy then puffed in annoyance "Fine prepare the technique and I will give you my Zephyrus spirit so you can perform it"

"Zephyrus spirit?" Stan asked.

"No time just do what ever it is you need to do now" Naruto shouted standing with his hand on a shuriken scroll.

"Fine… ZEPHYRUS HEAR MY PLEA GIVE US YOUR STRENGTH" She shouted as she blasted a glowing gust of wind at Naruto.

Immeadatially he felt energy rushing through him. It was pure bliss he could feel the whole of the energy locking itself with his soul. However the energy was now being trapped behind the Kyuubi's cell, so he had to act quickly "SHURIKEN ART: ART 50: BUZZSAW HAWK" he shouted pouring as much energy to his feet and taking off into the sky.

The scroll released literally thousands of shuriken that warped and grew when they passed Naruto. He was surrounded by a huge ball of shuriken that began to move and shift. Large bladed wings made from giant demon wind mills broke out from the orb's sides and large legs with talons burst out from the bottom. A head emerged from the orb with Naruto in its head where the brain of a normal bird would be glowing with an unreal intensity. The orb then contracted forming a body. It was then that the techniques purpose was fulfilled. Naruto had created a giant hawk armor out of shuriken. The shuriken began spinning generating a whirlwind that propelled it to the mechanical monster.

Mecha-Streisand didn't know what hit it. A large tunnel of wind just burst forth form behind and suddenly a giant metal bird was beating the shit out of her. It pushed her back and floated towards her flapping its metal wings. She unleashed a sonic blast from her mouth and sent it back. It seemed to fall apart slightly before it sent the fallen pieces flying at her. The large hawk then began to disassemble Barbra thought she had won. However it wasn't over, the pieces never hit the ground but instead they went flying after her in a large current smashing into her chest before they did a flip and turned back into the hawk that was again smashing its wing into her head. She grabbed the wings and tore them off trying to get this metal hawk to stay down but its legs turned into a giant fan and made a jet stream. It flew around in a circle catching all the pieces. It then dashed towards her once again forming the large spear before it slammed into her chest and pushed her up in the air. The hawk then re appeared and grabbed onto her shoulders with its talons. It did a flip and sent the mech-dino-woman into the air before a large beam came down and pierced it chest. The hawk let out a large cry as Barbra came back down with a pile driver. The hawk screeched again as she grabbed its head and attempted to pull it off. The hawk started beating its wings and slowly brought her up into the air before it started the fan move again and began moving so fast that she let go.

Barbra landed on the ground with a crash and released another shot from her cannon. It hit the hawks wing hard chopping off some of the steel feathers making the wings lopsided. It screamed before it began to shrunk. Naruto's giant hawk slowly turned into a hawk styled armor that then focused it self into a strange fan device on Naruto's arm. "Time to end this bitch" he shouted.

Barbra then charged and tackled him, but never landed. The shuriken that had been on his arm all launched forward and were then trans formed into a long series of fans before Naruto released his ultimate single shot attack "AERO SHREDDER CANON". a huge beam of glowing wind then pushed Barbra into the sky threw the hurricane with enough force to blast a whole in it , that quickly sealed up, and into the flying ship which then exploded.

Naruto's shuriken all disappeared and the entire gang and the town ran towards him. "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT DUDE" Kyle shouted.

" I'll explain later, right now we need to get on the road" he replied before he trugged towards the wagons.

The group just followed him, after all they had nothing else left here.

**END**

**NEXT TIME : Hail King Butters The …Conqueror ?**The Gang meet up with butters who has become a king, but there's something fishy about how he got the position.

The aliens plot an attempt to kill the gang, what will they do.

And Jiraya manages to catch up with the gang after he fell out of the wagons just in time for some action.

Shuriken Art- A group of fifty shuriken based justu the weakest one being art 1

Buzz saw hawk -Art 50- the most powerful and most draining attack in Naruto's book, it allows one to use Shuriken as a giant hawk shaped armor

Aero shredder cannon-Art 45- by using a multitude of charged shuriken Naruto spins th energy and releases a controlled twister in a straight forward blast, it is strong enough to take down the wall of Kohona in one shot.

Aero torpedo- art 24- by using the shuriken as a fan one can propel them selves forward at high speeds for a ramming maneuver

Shuriken torrent - art 40- using many shuriken one can create a large spinning battering ram that can shred one opponent or an army of them to bits

Hawk armor- art 25- only half as powerful as the Buzz saw hawk it fits around the body and allows one to hover using shuriken fans at the soles of their feet

**Yeah I know that it rushed but I started it then I forgot about it and then I picked it up again and I wanted to move on to the next chapter so…nee.**


	7. Butters arrival

**Hey faithful readers or interested new comers, its thought seeker here with an few important messages first harassing hobos may be fun but you shouldn't do it… not without proper training so remember kids get properly licensed before harassing your local Hobo. Next on my list my last chapter was a bit rushed I promise that I'll try my best not to get a head of myself so don't get on my back I just hated that chapter and it leaves so much to be desire. That being said if you feel like you can do a better job of writing that chapter the go ahead be my guest, just please don't mess with the main plot of the chapter**

By the way if any of you are interested in writing a story based on some other idea I've got then go ahead, here's my idea:

**It starts out at the beginning of the series when Naruto is learning the shadow clone. As he is searching it for a second jutsu to learn he finds a little hand shaped array at the center of the scroll. Naruto then activates the seal which turns out to be a fail safe in case it was stolen. Now Naruto has to go threw his ninja career with the entire list of jutsu's and village secrets from the scroll tattooed onto his person, all the while dodging his jutsu hungry allies, kunoichi from enemy villages, and the temptation to use the jutsu now embedded into his skin. Refrain from using Naru/saku , Naruto/Tsunade or, if you can't think of an original way for them to get together, Naru/hina. It's just a major pet peeve of mine, sorry. Harem is aloud but not with any of those listed sbove because hinata's from a powerful family and would most likely think it improper, sakura doesn't seem like the type to share, and tsunade for obvious reasons **

**So what do you think the idea is open to anyone willing to try! I would write it myself but I've got this story to write so….yeah. If you want advice on how to do that just drop me a line (E-mail me for those that don't get it) because I got some ideas for it.**

**CHAPTER 7: All Hail King Butters The … Conqueror?**

The fairly large group of travelers were going down the road confused. They could not see the next city at all and according to the map and Kyle you should be able to see the towers of the castle in the divided kingdom. When asked about why it was called the divided kingdom neither Kyle, Cartman, or Stan knew the answer and Wendy was fairly clueless about the world outside the temple walls so her insight was simply mute. Naruto looked up into the trees trying to find an explanation. He could however only come up with one solution that didn't seem to make sense unless he had one vital piece of information. "Hey Kyle, the badlands aren't frequently traveled off the trade routes are they?"

"Yep, it could be a good fifty years until another traveler comes this way, after all the divided kingdom is known to ship most of their exports down to the cities in sema valley using their airships, if fact there hasn't been any real news from The D.K. in the past three years" Kyle said as he kept his wagon on course as Kin and Wendy were jumping between the two wagons.

"Phhh..Jew" Cartman mumbled as he watched the fighting overhead.

"Shut the fuck up fat boy" Kyle shouted as he turned his attention to the two leaping ladies" What are you two doing up there?" he asked as they both stopped landing on two opposite wagons.

"We're golfing" Kin said before jumping back into the air holding a golf club and taking a swing at Wendy only to be blocked.

Naruto had turned his head to watch the unfolding events " I'm not sure if you're doing it right" he said .

Kin just glared at him and said "Fuck you" before she went back to her midair fight.

"Later" Naruto shot back before he stopped his cart, therefore, stopping the rest of the crew "Do any of you have a way to see over the tree line?" He asked.

Kyle looked over to Ike who started to panic. "No Kyle I won't do it , no please don't make me" Ike pleaded.

"Come on Ike the sooner you do this the sooner we can get into a hotel and the sooner we're in Kohona" Naruto reasoned.

"Fine" Ike agreed as Kyle and him lined up.

Kyle got into position which was basically a high kick with his leg bent back like a side kick. Ike jumped into the air and landed on the sole of Kyle's shoe. Kyle then launched ht kick sending Ike flying into the air and disappearing from sight. "Don't worry he'll come back soon, catching him is the hard part" Kyle stated as they all waited.

The group stood there their necks cranked skyward as they awaited the youngest member of their traveling band. As they did the oldest member of the group came trudging onto the road, Jiraya "why in the world did you guys dump me in a ditch half a mile from the tunnel of god and why are you already hundreds of miles away from that city, I was supposed to guide you and who are you people I don't remember seeing you people before and furthermore…" Jiraya didn't finish as Ike came crashing down and landed on Jiraya.

"The city is fifty miles away from here, in what direction I don't know I got dizzy on the way down" Ike explained as he climbed up off the back of Jiraya and climbed into Kyle's and his cart.

"No matter I'll just use my chakra compass and" The entire group groaned as Naruto pulled out the little trinket that he had probably been using to get them here.

Naruto held the map in one hand and the compass in his other while he faced forward on the road. The glowing tip pointed slightly towards the left and Naruto checked the map. Fit didn't take him long to find their location. He guided the group forward toward the next city. Not but seconds later Jiraya stood up from his little crater and noticed his charge and his friends leaving and ran after them shouting.

The group pulled into the main road into the kingdom and was immediately amazed by the sights they saw. At first it was pretty simple and ordinary but the closer thy got to the center of the small kingdom the more extravagant and complicated the buildings got. They brought their wagons into a little stable and unpacked their belongings from them, anything that they couldn't take out at that point they kept in the wagon which they locked up in the storage sheds.

Everyone in the group, even the well traveled Jiraya was amazed by the tall stone buildings. By far the inspiration for these designs was not the lands of the Godai, cartman noted that it wasn't Capatasim or Dimbala, so it had to be Lavestania. It made complete sense when you looked at the large towering castle that obscured large parts of the sky with its massive towers. While the group walked the streets of the city looking for a hotel they notice that the citizens seemed to be in a constant fear like they were being watched and they were. Guards stood at every street corner dressed in fine armor with a black head band. Naruto summized that they were the local police force and told his friends to be careful.

It didn't take them long to find a suitable hotel, but it was a bit pricy forcing Naruto to pay for all his friends room, even Jiraya's who had swipped his key while grumbling about disrespectful brats leaving him on the side of the road. He lead Kin up to their room were she imeaditally leaped on the bed and started rolling in it like crazy while she went on about how she missed the nice soft supporting mattress of a bed. Naruto laughed and joined in.

**COUNCIL OF THIRTY (down to twenty eight)**

"Barbra Streisand still has not returned she failed her mission of destroying the human settlement" said one of the larger aliens.

"Yes she did but those kids interfered again and each time they do their numbers grow and they grow stronger" Said a short alien.

"Leader will not be pleased of our failure, he already has a group of specialist but he'd prefer not use them until he needed too" said a sticky alien with multiple limbs.

"What does leader know, he never shows up to these meetings, sure he didn't found this alliance but he gave it purpose, he needs to be here" Shouted the short aliens second ambassador.

"Yes but now we also lost some major muscle, Mecha-Streisand was meant to be a trump card in our invasions" explained the Grey one.

"If she was our muscle then how did these children beat her so easily" Argued one member before hell broke loose in the chamber.

Suddenly a small large fisted alien slammed its hand down "enough" he shouted ending the bickering "I know just what to do, we need to get rid of those kids, and I think I know how" With that the alien started laughing.

* * *

Naruto and Jiraya were standing in a local forest by a river. Jiraya was trying to convince Naruto to practice the water walking exercise.. "Listen kid you have to do this…Tell you what if you go through with this I will teach you a jutsu used by the forth hokage" the old age offered.

Naruto went star eyed at the mention of the forth hokage's jutsu "Deal old perv" he shouted as he ran out on to the water.

Jiraya just stood smirking at his "Ingenious" plan known as bribery.

Mean while Wendy, Kin and Stan were out in the shopping district of the town. Wendy and kin were enjoying the shopping while Stan was doing some heavy lifting. They went through town cheerily skipping along and talking about girl things as Stan struggled to keep the ever growing pile of things balanced in his hands. Suddenly Stan stopped and called to the girls "Hey Kin, Wendy, I think we go to stop something" He shouted.

And indeed they did. Cartman and Kyle had gotten into another argument that had just turned into a shouting match. "Shut up Jew boy"

"Make me Fatass"

"Oh call me fat now. It's come to that you stupid Jew"

"You are fat you retard you're a sumo wrestler"

"Yeah I know it doesn't mean you have to shout it to the world Wej"

"I don't' have too… Wej what the hell's a wej"

"Its Jew backwards… I ran out of insulting slurs"

"Heh figures the lard ass would come up with a lame ass insult like that"

"Hey don't make me kick you in the nuts Kyle" Cartman finished.

Stan and the girls who were off to the side just sweat dropped at the exchange. Some things never change. However some things do, and they never noticed the guards that were at the corner earlier leaving.

Jiraya watched with pride as his student took the water walking exercise like Jesus… whoever he was, he seemed to be extremely prominent in religion in capatasim, and Lavetania . The teacher and student pair remained there in the clearing for quite a while each time Naruto asking if they could take a break Jiraya telling him to go on. It wasn't long before his current pupil came walking back on to shore. "Teach me something else" Naruto demanded his eyes dead panned.

Jiraya looked him over before nodding "Yes maybe we should move on…but first a little test" he said as he tied a blindfold over Naruto's eyes and spun him around and sent him walking right towards the river.

Jiraya smirked when he saw naruto take his fist unknowing step onto the water. His smirk got even stronger when he saw Naruto actually walking across the water with no idea where he was heading. Sure Naruto probally heard the running water but he had been here for the past four hours so obviously he would get used to it and apparently he did. When Naruto reached the other side of the river, having wandered aimlessly around before finding the other end, Jiraya called out to him "Boy turn around and remove the blind fold"

Naruto did as he was told and was amazed to see that he was standing on the other side of the river. "Congratulations brat, now, get back over here so I can teach you something else" Jiraya shouted as he waved his hands in the air.

" What did I just do" Naruto asked stunned by the prospect of what he had just done as he crossed back over the river.

"You instinctively used your chakra to cross the river, its how you know you've truly mastered this technique" Jiraya said as he pulled out two scrolls "Now I will begin teaching you these two techniques, now make a shadow clone and have it practice drawing out as much chakra as possible….

Wendy and Kin were both holding Kyle and Cartman back while Stan stood in between the two arguing buddies. The two were shouting fairly loudly and had drawn quite a crowd to their spectacle "Come on guys quite it people are watching" Stan pleaded but the two ignored him.

The crowd was whispering to itself about how horrible something would be , Stan knew it had something to do with them. The two girls in their group slowly grew angrier and angrier until they both exploded "BOTH OF YOU STOP" they shouted in unison.

The two boys immediately relaxed and huddled around Stan and begged him for protection from the psychotic women. Stan just sighed as he pried them off him and made thme help him carry the girls bags for the rest of the trip.

Naruto and Jiraya sat down in the clearing. Naruto's outfit was filled with nicks and cuts in the fabric and his face and hands had several scratches on it too. "Now Naruto now that you've got the hang of the instant master technique we need to work on summoning, now normally people think that as toad sage I only summon toads, but that's wrong it's only called the toad contract because the toads are the ruling family, this is because they are the stronger of the contract, mean while the frogs are faster and were a favorite of the forth hokage that was the one reason I could not pass on the title of "Toad" Sage to him for the toad sage is trained by the ruling family something Minato would constantly refuse to do" Jiraya explained as he held out the contract "Now write your name in the contract and watch what I do"

Naruto did just as he was told and watched Jiraya perform the summoning jutsu. He was amazed at the creature he summoned, even if he saw it before, because it was pulled form nowhere it seemed. Jiraya saw the boy's amazement and laughed "Now you try, remember what I told you too do with a shadow clone well now do it here yourself" Jiraya advised.

Naruto reached deep inside himself and pulled forth all the energy he could and preformed the jutsu and force it in to his palm summoning a tadpole. Naruto sweatdroped and did it again and got the same results. He got a little frustrated and stopped to think, and then it clicked in his head. He brought all the chakra he could from his body and flared it around his skin, causing an ethereal wind to pick up around him. He then preformed the jutsu and forced all the chakra around his skin into his hands and into the jutsu. This time he got…. A medium sized toad. It looked at him, and Naruto looked back before the toad dispelled itself leaving a peaved Naruto and a laughing Jiraya. "Don't worry kid at least you go the jutsu down pat, but remember chakra is always more potent with emotion, however it is less controlled a main reason why all shinobi are told to remain calm at all times" The old man said as he wiped a tear from his eye "You'll get better with practice trust me nor the fourth were great when we first started, in fact that's almost the same thing that happened to me when I did this the first time"

However Naruto was lying right on the floor exhausted, he pulled out way to much chakra into that technique with not enough direction. Direction was the secret to summoning after all, if you didn't direct the technique then the buffer that protects the area from the summons's wormhole would cause problems. Naruto had created a buffer area to large and a worm hole to small, all because he didn't direct the chakra right. Jiraya sighed shaking his head as he picked up Naruto and carried him back to the hotel so the kid could get some rest.

Ike was running through the streets of the city laughing. He had run into some other children that lived in the city and they invited him to play with them. This ended up with Ike playing soccer at a small local field. He liked playing soccer, it was a game that he never could have played in the valley for fear that the ball would fall into the water and be carried off. Now they were playing tag, kids were hiding every were in the city's streets but they had all been found. However the game wasn't over until the last person was tagged, and that was Ike. So that's how we got to were we are now. The boy that was it had recruited a few of the others to help him find Ike. When they did find him Ike went running with the boy chasing after him. Ike looked around desperately, he may not have been fast but there is one skill you don't live in semi without, Parkour. Ike smiled as he found a way off the streets. He moved over to the side of the wall and walked up the stacked pile of bricks that to him were a stair case.

He laughed as he did so not really knowing that the people of this town were unaware of this art. When he reached the top of the stack he jumped and grabbed on to the nearby balcony before pulling himself up. He looked down to see the kid still running but instead of following him he runs into the shop across the street. Ike laughed again as he began climbing the building to the very top. When he reached the top he found that the kids had went up the stairs and were preparing to jump the gap, which wasn't very big. Ike turned and ran in the other direction as the kids jumped the gap and pursue him. Ike was again looking for an exit and found it, he jumped across the road and grabbed onto the roof. He pulled himself up and looked as the other kids caught up and looked at him with awe.

Ike decides to climb down on the other side of the building. He was shocked by what he saw there.

There in the court yard was a large group of guards all of them surrounding his brother and friends all but Naruto. A small man walked forward carrying a scroll before unfurling it in front of the trapped group "You have been arrested for disturbing the peace, you will be brought before the king for your crimes so he may execute you" said the man before the guards carried them off. Ike was shocked, he had to find Naruto.

Jiraya sat in the chair across the room from the bed and smiled when Naruto stirred "Your awake good, I was worried that you never would"

Naruto sat up groaning "Ahh what happened"

"You used to much chakra, but you don't seem to have much of a reaction to chakra exhaustion, however, you probably just strained your system when you drew out all that chakra then sucked it back in" Jiraya explained.

That's when they heard a knocking on the door. It was Ike he was standing on the balcony and he looked exhausted. "What's wrong Ike" They asked as he climbed in the window.

"The others…arrested…executed….king" Ike managed to pant out as he fainted and fell to the floor..

"What their being executed" Naruto exclaimed as he stared at Ike "He must have wanted me to go to the king to get the decision overturned" Naruto then barreled out of the room "Bye old perv I got to save kin and the others" He said as he slammed the door.

Naruto raced through the streets of the city as he grew closer and closer to the castle in the distance. He saw crowds of people murmuring, and heard what they were talking about. Apparently the king preformed the executions himself with in minutes of the convicted arrest. He panicked and took to the roof tops jumping across the roof like a mad man. As he got close enough to see over the wall he prepared his weapons to attack. He flew over the wall and landed in a crouch four blades formed from shuriken and dashed forward. He sliced one guard's legs before tossing one of the four blades forward sending it through one of the guards and pinning them to the wall. Two guards tried to get him from behind but he shoved them back with a spin before making two clones. "Hold off the guards" Naruto ordered before he ran into the actually castle.

He crashed in through a window as to sneak in. The easiest thing to do would be to find the main hall and attack from above so he needs to get to the second floor of the main hall. He wandered around a bit and managed to find a member of the staff and threaten them for directions. He was satisfied by their response and knocked them out cold. He rushed through the halls taking out any guards with little effort determined o reach his destination in time. He made it just in time too, Kin was about to be executed by a man with a steel band crown. He Moved back and ran forward blade raised above his head to strike. Naruto remained silent as he descended but was shocked when the scythe the man carried blocked his sword "**Well, well, well if it isn't the Kenny, I wondered if you were traveling with the old gang**" as he turned around to revel himself to be…Butters!!!!

However something was off with him, Naruto figured that it was the demonic mask that rested on the right side of his face "Well hiya" "**Shut it You" "**I'll be quiet"Naruto shook his head, something was definitely wrong with butters.

"**I am Emperor Chaos the conqueror"**

"And I'm butters"

"**I SAID SILENCE, ****I see you're here to rescue your friends, oh so predictable Kenny, ever loyal to his friends"**

"Yeah he's a nice guy ain't he?"

"**GUUURRR, tell you what if you can defeat me I will release your friends" **offered Chaos as he stood there holding the scythe.

Naruto was carefully in his decision; his friends who were gagged and bound were telling him not to do it by shaking their heads. It was most likely a trap, but it was the only way to free his friends. It was just like the man known as chaos…or butters, it really depended on what side of his body you approached the id entity issue, had said. "I will, I will face you in battle" that was Naruto's final decision.

Naruto and the demon possessed Butters stood in the middle of a large stadium while the others sat in the stands surrounded by guards. The exposed half of butters face was grinning an awful evil grin. Off to the side the stood a royal servant with two flags high in the air. He looked at both fighters and swung them down initiating the fight. No one moved both just stared as they slid into their stances. Naruto glared "What happened to you butters you were a kind person, and now your a king who willing executes people with his own blade, how far did you fall?"

Chaos or Butters laughed " **I was once a pitiful soul ruled only by my sorrow and insecurities, but then i found this mask of mine, of course back then it only covered my eye but as time went on me and the spirit of the mask became one, and the being that came from that is I Chaos the conquer"** said the manic King "**Butters using my power, my knowledge, my force gathered an army and usurped the throne, at that time he stopped taking my mask off his face as a symbol of his kingly power instead of a crown, this allowed me to come into being" **Chaos started laughing "** Now with each passing second the moment grows near when Butters dissappears and i'm only left to rule"**

"Your evil" spat Naruto.

"**Evil, ha no I am mch worse...as I told you before I AM CHAOS!!!!!" **Shouted the possesed King.

Chaos slipped back prepare to strike as Naruto charged forward, When he got close enough butters swung but Naruto shifted into a slide and kicked up at butters chin. Butters however jumped up and kicked Naruto back sending him on his back. Butters brought the scythe down to stab him but Naruto rolled and kicked the scythe back before jumping up. Butters took another swing but Naruto jumped back and threw a few shuriken up in the air. Butters paid them no mind, until he heard a whizzing sound from above. He spun the scythe over his head deflecting the shuriken and frowned. "**Heh I thought you out grew shuriken Kenny, especially ever since you threw one in my eye**"

That sparked something in Naruto's mind. He backed up before grabbing a few classic shuriken. "Shuriken art : art 1: gryo blade" He shouted as he threw three shuriken that began spiraling around themselves.

The Shuriken turned into an orb of energy before extending into a larger shuriken. The giant three pronged shuriken that headed towards butters, who simply slapped he shuriken away dissipating the charka around the shuriken. Naruto growled in frustration before running forward with a spear shuriken. Butters beat him at every turn before hitting him with the scythe's handle. Butters laughed as he picked him up using the scythe stabbed him and flung him into the air. Naruto ended up crashing through a glass window.

He got up groaning and looked up, there was a large swinging chandelier that threatened to fall with him directly under it. It stopped shaking and Naruto sighed in relief, it wouldn't fall. Then it did. It just fell no snapping ropes, no breaking steel, it just fell and crushed him alive, his last words were "….Aw shit"

Meanwhile in the field Butters heard the crash of the falling chandelier and started laughing.

Naruto saw the world once again, but his head was spinning. He could hear strange voices talking about some sort of surgery. He paid it no mind and plotted his counter attack on butters. Looking over to the side he saw the crystal from the chandelier and the large iron frame. He smiled and started gathering crystals.

Out on the field the judge was about to declare a victor, Butters. That was until a giant iron star shaped chandelier came flying through the wall and towards Butters. Butters just blocked and were pushed back farther then the shuriken went, Dashing out from the crumbling building Naruto came flying out throwing crystals spears at his enemy. Butters kept up his guard and smirked "**Still alive I see, I'll just have to fix that**"

Naruto was still running at him and grabbed the large star shaped steel frame and lifted it above his head. He morphed it into a small necklace and smirked before putting his hands together. The necklace and the compass began to glow as they lifted into the air. Naruto pulled his arms back and slammed them together as the star glowed "Art 2: Spectral shuriken"

Butters blocked but was hit by an attack from behind. Naruto had attached two wind mills too his arms and was fighting like his hawk armor "Art 10: Hawk wing burst" Butters was sent flying and crashing as he dropped his scythe. Naruto ran for him picking up the scythe and roaring. He swung while butters was still disorientated and hit him in the mask. It shattered and light filled the area.

"Thanks for helping me guys" Butters said the other half of his face revealed, He wore a steel headband with a red jewel embedded in it.

"Yeah it's the least I can do butters" Naruto said embarrassed as the other grumbled behind him.

Butters then passed out from exhaustion before he was carried off the feild.

* * *

"So what are you going to do now that you can control your body again" Naruto asked.

"Yeah about that could me and my girls travel with you,, I mean we gave our father control of the kingdom, I'm not fit to rule at least not yet and I think if I come with you I can learn how to" Butters asked as he kicked up dirt as the wind blew it into his fine silver cloack

.Naruto laughed at how pathetic butters looked "Sure butters"

" Aw man the little gay fag is coming with us now" Cartman complained as the girls behind butters glared.

"DON'T INSULT MASTER" shouted the five girls in Romanian accents.

**END Chapter**

**END TALES OF THE BADLANDS**

**Hey readers did you like it? As you guessed from above I have stopped with the badlands saga and am now moving on to the main series meaning the chunin exams and tsunade as well as Sasuke retrieval. There will also be some fillers arcs and land of snow, if I can find a reliable source for the episodes and the movie. So if you know one and want to see those just post where I can find it and I will do my best. Oh and if anyone can pitch a good plot for some Custom filler arcs feel free to do so, i've already got an idea on what going on, and remember Butters won't be the last south park character. **


	8. Final exams part 1

**DEAD MAN IS WALKING**

**Chapter 8: The Final's part 1: under the town and the white eyes**

Naruto and his band of friends and Jiraya entered the village peacefully as they could. However they were having trouble with crowds of people from many villages. Naruto looked over the crowd with a sense of confusion. He turned to Jiraya "Hey old perv what's with all these travelers, there's never this many in one day."

Jiraya laughed "Brat, it's the chunin exams, the village always gets like this at the final exam, it's the most important of all" he explained " After all this is the stage were the genin prove to our employers and to our Daimyo, to prove we're not a waste of resourses, funny thing though this kind of traffic usually arrives on the day of the….match BOY GET OFF THAT WAGON AND GET RUNNING YOUR GONNA BE LATE" Shouted Jiraya as he leaped up and threw the boy of the wagon.

Naruto turned around and glared "Alright I'll hurry but make sure you get this done fast so you can come and see my match, its up first you know" when he finished he turned around and ran towards the stadium on the other side of town.

Naruto ran through town dodging people trying to get to the stadium. He had a couple of close calls but none of them stood in his way. As he dashed though the streets of the village he saw a big man coming up. With a practiced skill Naruto pivoted around the huge man…only to hit someone else. "Hey watch it…BOSS!!!" Shouted the boy "Hey who's that kid" he asked pointing to Ike who had followed him.

Naruto looked at him for an explanation. Ike started sweating "the others told me to tail you to make sure you don't get distracted" Ike explained as he huddled on the ground.

Naruto stared at Ike before shifting his attention to Konohamaru "This is Ike, his older brother is a friend of mine" Naruto then looked to the C.A.D.U.'s watch "Ah man at this rate I'll never get to the stadium in time" he shouted as he began to panic.

"The stadium, you mean the one their holding the final stage of the exams in?" Konohamaru asked.

"Is there any other?" Naruto retorted with a straight face.

"Ahehehehehe…Well It's just that I know literally thousands of shortcuts around the village and I just happen to know the one that can get you to the stadium faster" Konohamaru explained as he rubbed the back of his head.

"Well what are we waiting for lets go" Naruto said as he started to drag Konohamaru around.

"wait there's something I need to tell you" Konohamaru tried to explain, but Naruto wouldn't listen.

Naruto, Konohamaru, and Ike all stood at a open man hole. Naruto climbed in first, then Ike , and then a reluctant Konohamaru. "So Konohamaru, where do we go from here?" Naruto asked as he looked at his watch

"No where, not before I tell you something extremely important that I tried to tell you earlier" Shouted Konohamaru as he panted trying to calm down "all right , these tunnels were built as the original service and evacuation routed for the entire village during the reign of the First Hokage, every single major hub in and outside of this village is connected by these tunnels, including the stadium and the Hokage's tower" Konohamaru explained "Unfortunately during the second shinobi war Iwa learned of these tunnels and decided to use them to make the village fall, literally" he paused to let it sink in " They were planning to blow up the entire tunnel system at key stress points which would cause a chain reaction making the entire village fall into the ground collapsing in on itself, fortunately a group of konoha ninja encountered their saboteurs before they got into the tunnels, after that the Second Hokage decided to make the tunnels intraversable for anyone who didn't know the jutsu code that only the hokage and a few select ninja would , to do this three hundred of the villages best seal masters were sent into the tunnels to cover every surface with seals, only twenty made it out of the tunnel in the first day, forty the next and that was it, ever since the tunnels have been an unsolvable maze ,as the walls are constantly shifting, filled to the brim with deadly traps" Konohamaru explained as he took a deep breathe.

"Wow…….well lets go" Naruto exclaimed as he turned to go down the tunnel before he shot up in to the sky.

Ike and Konohamaru looked up and just face vaulted. Naruto had gotten caught in one of the simplest traps in the world. "Well don't just stand there get me down"

It didn't take long to get him down, and as such the group was back on there way in seconds. Naruto lead the group and turned right at the next corner. He was shocked to see the entrance and the frayed rope he had been hanging from only a minute ago. He turned back down the other hallway he had just exited and saw the same. He looked towards Konohamaru, who only smirked .Naruto grumbled and headed towards the rope and picked it up and motioned for Konohamaru to follow him. He pulled out a Kunai and tied the rope through the loop. He told them to watch and threw the Kunai while holing the end of the rope in his other hand. He curved it so it flew down the hallway the hallway they just tried to turn down, they were expecting it to fly back and it did, Naruto gave it a tug but it wouldn't budge like it was stuck on a corner. Naruto was confused; he thought it was a large scale charka disrupting genjustsu that totally obliterated ones sense of direction. But now he was thinking that the entire place was a fun house just warping reality, those men were seal masters.

Naruto then released one end an gave the rope a sharp tug sending it flying back. He caught the other end of the rope in his hand with a natural ease. He then threw the Kunai straight forward, it did not return he began pulling himself forward as he collected the rope on his arm. He turned back to Konohamaru with somewhat of a glare "so how is this a shortcut again?" he asked.

Konohamaru just rubbed his head sheepishly "Well Grandpa always said that because of the shifting walls it was impossible to tell where you were, but if you stopped moving long enough then you could see the walls shift and rotate, he then said something about a balcony area that is commonly used as the main service tunnels, so all we have to do is find one of those and we'll be on our way"

When the three stopped Naruto noticed that the kunai was now facing behind him. It all clicked in his head. He threw his hands together "Release" instantly the room began to shift into a series of pillars all of them supporting a walkway system and pipes that were part of the Villages sewage system. The large space was strange as a growling noise could be heard. Naruto compelled to follow the noise but went against it. He thought he could see a pair of glowing red eyes in the distance but ignored them in favor of his mission.

He guided the other two through the halls of pillars that had various intricate symbols engraved on them. He felt tempted to examine them try and figure them out but time was not on his side. However Naruto did have enough time to put a little something of his on the pillar. This plane of endless pillars held potential for something, what it was he wasn't quite sure but it was there. The other two were still under the genjutsu so he had to pull them through the hall of tunnels until he found a ladder.

They made it up the ladder and into the balcony. While up there Konohamaru went wide eyed "Wow, it's just….it's just a field of pillars"

'No it isn't, the tunnels are to keep people from getting here to the pillars that support the village, the tunnels are coated with seals that bend reality to keep people trapped in a little area" Naruto said as he looked down on the floor "see the arrow shapes on the floor Its how the hokage and the anbu know how to navigate the tunnels, their secret jutsu must charge them to make them visible which would suppress the reality distortion" Naruto said as he tried to explain the area the best he could " I thought it was a genjutsu but now I think that releasing it just pushed us out of the tunnels" naruto finished as he turned to Konohamaru "So how so we get out of here?"

"Grandpa said that the entrance to the stadium's secret entrance is up the only staircase in this place" Konohamaru explained.

Naruto sighed as him and the others began to walk through the rafters that overlooked the halls of pillars. Every once in a while the pillars would spin moving the rafters above with it. As Konohamaru described, it was an unsolvable maze. It took them ten minutes of searching desperately for the stairs and the exit of this damned maze.

Genma and the chunin hopefuls stood in the center of the arena awaiting the other competitors to arrive. The tournament was supposed to start about five minutes ago, but three of the nine competitors had not yet arrived so the hokage allowed them to push back the time. However the time was now running out. Genma sighed "Naruto Uzu…" He stopped when he heard a large rumbling noise.

A slab of stone on the wall receded and a dust covered Naruto, Ike and Konohamaru emerged. "Naruto Uzumaki reporting for the final exam sir" Naruto stated and then turned around " Ike take Konohamaru and try and find the others" Ike folloed his instructions immediately dragging Konohamaru up the stairs to the audience section.

"Wow, that's a surprising entrance" Said Ino as she stared at field which had the now closing hole in the wall.

"Puh, I bet Sasuke can make one ten times better" Sakura said as Ino just stared at her "What?"

"Why is it that every time Naruto does something you say Sasuke can do it ten times better?" Ino asked.

"Because he can" Sakura stated firmly.

"Sakura, Naruto can pull a resurrection and you said Sasuke can do one better…How can you one up coming back from the dead Sakura, there's a thing called being a faithful admire then there's being an idiot Sakura" Ino shouted not caring who stared.

Sakura could do nothing but huff.

Back on the field Genma was going over his list before an Anbu guard jumped down from the booth. He stood there as he was given instructions nodding. The guard finished and then jumped back up to the booth. "All right listen up there's been a change in the line Instead of Shikamaru getting a by he is facing Temari is that clear" he exclaimed.

The hopefuls nodded, as he told everyone but Naruto and Neji to clear the field. They all walked off into the competitor's box as Naruto and Neji moved to opposing sides of the field. Neji then began his little rant. "You have no hope in beating me fate has already declared me the winner"

"If everything went the way fate had declared then we wouldn't have free will now would me" Naruto shot back.

"It doesn't matter what you say fate has determined that whenever we fight fate will see me victor" Neji stated as he slid into his stance "Your little death trick was nothing more that an illusion used to phase Kiba and your future opponent, me, you have nothing to use against me"

"Tell me Neji, if fate has determined you victor, why would fate tell you, it seems like such a thing would breed only incompetence and spoil it's plan would it not" Naruto countered as he inwardly laughed, it was fun to annoy people using their own beliefs.

"Shut up" Neji said through a clenched scowl as he dashed across the field and moved to strike "TWO PALMS"

"BARRICADE" Naruto shouted as he moved to block both of Neji's strike and then dropping his guard.

Neji continued the strikes but they didn't seem to have any affect other than irritate Naruto. When he finished Neji just stared at the still standing Naruto. "What were you expecting for me to suddenly explode for me to just collapse, well that's what barricade does it is specifically made to counter the Jyuken and make it a series of useless pokes" He said smugly as Neji growled with rage.

"I don't need my Hands to beat you" Neji said as he ran forward under Naruto's guard and punted him into the air. From there he flung several shuriken at Naruto who pulled out a few of his own to counter.

Naruto smirked as he descended and switched into a dead drop as he charged his body with chakra. When he hit the ground he released all the pent up energy resulting in a shockwave that slammed Neji into the wall. Naruto then pulled out more shuriken and threw them " shadow shuriken jutsu"

More shuriken came at Neji who simply dashed forward and slide under the wave. He continued his charge before ducking under Naruto's guard and kneeing him. At that moment Naruto felt a burst of chakra rip through his body. He then cursed as he realized Jyuken was a style that relied on CHAKRA BURSTS attacks and not jab attacks, as such a true master could theoretically fire a burst from any place on his body without moving. So while Neji wasn't a master of the art he was greatly talented so of course he would be able to use jyuken with his knees or wrist or elbows.

Naruto pulled out a demon windmill and blocked Neji's elbow. He then pushed him back and flung the Windmill, he then activated its seal. The four blades broke off from each other and spread out before whipping around Neji. Neji panicked and pulled off a rotation.

Tenten was sitting in the stands amazed by Naruto's creative use of shuirken. However, Neji's rotation was literally the ultimate defense. By emitting chakra from every point in his body he could shield himself from most light attacks, but by adding a spin he could deflect almost any attack. Nothing could pierce it ,the ultimate shield.

'so a member of the branch house knows that move' Thought Hiashi up in the stands.

"Father, what was that" Hanabi asked as she stared wide eyed out into the field.

"That is the Rotation, a powerful move exclusive to the main branch" Hiashi explained "If Neji is using it without proper instruction then he truly is a genius, such a shame that such talent is wasted on the branch house"

"You know nothing of my life you don't deserve to judge me I will win, I will squash you beneath my feet" Ranted Neji as he stood still prepared to attack.

Across the field Naruto stood the same "Skip the sob story Neji, I don't care about your struggle or your plight, because if this is what that fight made you, then it's obvious that you gae up on that fight long ago" Naruto said a she stepped forward a shuriken in hand.

"Shut up" shouted Neji as he ran forward his hands now glowing with stored energy.

'Shit if he tries to use Jyuken with barricade still active he'll turn my organs to dust' naruto thought as he jumped back and threw a couple shuriken up in the air where they turned.

Neji continued charging his attack until his hands glowed with a blinding intensity. He dashed ahead and stood in front of Naruto as he shoved his palm forward "JYUKEN " Naruto jumped back and ducked as a beam of light suddenly erupted from Neji's hands .

Naruto looked behind him to see a poor bystander get hit by the beam. He glowed as beams of light pieced out from his form and then he just turned to dust. The dust was still glowing with a shining light, but it soon faded.

Above the two combatants the Shuriken that Naruto had thrown had grown a single large spike that weighed them down. When the shuriken peeked the two blades turned down towards them and fell.

Neji was exhausted, he had put every little bit of power he could into that last attack just to break the barricade that was severely hampering his abilities. No matter how much he tried to deny it Naruto had found the fatal flaw in Jyuken, the dependence on ones hands. Most of the Hyuuga who claimed to master Jyuken only use it with their hands and no place else. If Naruto had used this on them they would be completely helpless with no other jutsu to use.

Neji then popped a soilder pill into his mouth and backed up. As he did several large shuriken struck the ground. He stared at the ground then at Naruto, he dashed forward and unleashed chakra charged punches and kicks. Naruto blocked most of them, some blows sneaking by his guard suddenly Neji grabbed Naruto by the arm and flung him at the wall. Naruto bounced back with two chakra charged shuriken . He threw the chakra charged shuriken then leaped forward. Neji deflected them with a rotation, however Naturo caught them and charged them again to make a pair of claw like blades. Neji began another rotation and Naruto reared his arms to add more punch to his attack. An explosion rocked the arena and left dust in the air. Neji stumbled out of the cloed smirking "even after all that talk you put out your still a looser"

As Neji walked away as the match was being called a fist erupted from the ground. Naruto came flying up as he threw a punch into neji's jaw. "WINNER IS NARUTO UZUMAKI"

**END chapter 8**

**Next time Shikamaru's match is skipped over **

**Sasuke and garra fight fiercly**


	9. Big Racoons and Tragedy

**CHAPTER 9: BIG RACOONS: FINAL EXAMS PT 2**

Naruto in a victorious stride walked up to the competitor's box where all the other fighters waited. As he made his way into the hallway he saw two grass nin leaning on the walls glaring. "Can I help you assholes?" Naruto asked in the most chipper voice he could pull.

The men just glared at him before the man closest too him looked him right in the eye. "You're a pain you know that kid, or Daimyo put a lot of money on these matches, no more than the Uchiha's and the Hyuuga's" He said glaring with an intensified hatred "We were going to ask you to throw the bet but then we heard that you were the dead last of your class, but no you just had to be the comeback kid didn't you?" Asked the angry ninja sarcastically.

Naruto glared, he caught on to what was going on "Look if guys are looking to make a quick buck then here's a bit of advice for you" He grabbed the collar of the taller ninja and threw him to the floor before stepping on his neck "Uzumaki is the underdog who won't give up and never looses so if you bet against me your wallet is going to get a bit of relief" He finished as he stomped on the nin's neck making him scream.

He left the room leaving the Ninja on the floor in the care of his partner. He walked into the booth to see Ike waiting for him. "Finally, the others sent me to get you, come on" Ike said as he grabbed Naruto's wrist and dragged him up the stairs.

The gang all stood in a common area that overlooked the arena, They could here some shouting coming from a nearby staircase. "Guys, guys I got him" came a voice.

The gang turned toward the stairs to see Ike climbing up dragging Naruto behind him. They look at him and smile "Hey man we saw the match from the beginning, we almost thought you weren't gonna show" Stan said as he socked his shoulder.

Naruto laughed along with his friends at the little joke. Wendy then looked him in the eye and dragged him to the betting board. She pointed up at his name on the board "Cartman told us about the money you won in the tonament and Kin told us what you did with your place" She explained.

From there Kyle took control of the conversation "We're going to do the same and then some, but the tower will need more room" Kyle paused "However to expand we'll need money and lots of it"

"That's were you come in" Cartman said " your going to bet on your self with every dime you've got, and your going to win the fight you here me"

Naruto thought about it, honestly it was hard to hear himself think with the roar of the crowd getting louder and louder. As it seemed to peak he heard the Old Man's Voice echo through the stadium "ATTENTION SPECTATORS SASUKE UCHIHA'S MATCH HAS BEEN PUSHED BACK TO THE LAST FIGHT OF ROUND ONE".

Naruto then realized that he had a little knowledge almost no one else had. He rushed up to the counter and slammed his hands down "What are the odds that Sasuke Uchiha will forfeit his match?" he asked eagerly.

"Hmm…Kid this is Sasuke UCHIHA the last of the great Uchiha clan he wouldn't surrender…but still a bet is a bet, its ….1-200 odds in favor of him fighting" the bookie at the bar explained.

"Well I'll bet all the money I got that Sasuke Uchiha will be a no show and as soon as the match is called in garra's favor he'll show up…the I want you to take all of that money on Naruto Uzumaki beating Garra" Naruto shouted as he threw a piece of paper on to the table.

The man stated laughing but began to choke when he saw how much this kid had bet. Naruto had given him a voucher for every cent that he had, an official voucher from the bank of Konoha that Wendy had slipped him. His lips quivered at the possibilities, of all the things he could do with such money; but then he looked back at Naruto. He saw a group of teens that would be willing to kill him and any one related to him if he cheated them. "Alright I've got it down kid, now go on and get going or buy a drink" the man said as he slid the voucher into a page of his book before closing it and pocketing it.

Naruto and the others went around the stands looking for some seats before he heard someone call him. It was Sakura and Ino who were next to Kiba and Choji. He waved back as he told the gang to follow him. As the large group of people followed him down the steps Sakura and the others were confused. "Naruto, who are those people behind you?" Sakura asked nervously pointing to the people behind him.

Naruto looked at his friends behind him, how he did not notice after such a long time bewildered him. His friends were badlanders and they weren't exactly the gentlest people in the world. Kyle's muscled arms were rittled with burn marks and scars from working at his forge and training to use his weapons. Cartman was dressed in furrs all sown together from different animals. Stan was covered with enough muscle to make Gai jealous and Wendy while a happy go lucky girl had the eyes of hawk that could pierce one's soul. Then there was butters, who was the worst of them all, His body was covered in scars from his violent take over and his eyes were hardened by war, he dressed in the finest robes and carried a silver scythe with an obsidian blade, he was a true contradiction, he had a noble stance and noble clothing but his scythe told any one who saw it he was a fighter. Naruto then looked to butters little harem of concubines, each of them covered in the finest silk but then a sinister gleam shined from their eyes. They were more then just concubines, they were guards, most likely trained to kill people with only a hair pin. Naruto laughed at the realization of how dangerous his friends actually were. "Oh these are my new friends, I meet them while training in the badlands" he exlained as he motioned to cartman "this is Eric, he's a sumo wrestler from the village of nuway" he then went to butters "This is butters, he's the prince of the divided kingdom; and these are his consorts…whos names I don't remember" he moved on to stan and wendy "These two are Stan and Wendy, a couple from the city of Zephyrus near the temple of winds, Stan is an accomplished martial artist and Wendy is a priest" He then moved on to Kyle and Ike "And these two are Kyle and Ike two of the best black smiths from the badlands...right now their trying to get the funds to open up shop here in konoha" Naruto finished as he smiled gladly at his friends.

Kiba and Ino happily greeted the gang shaking each of their hands as they introduced themselves. Choji stood by Cartman looking him up and down before shaking his hand, as if some sign of comradeship between two people who have been called fat or fatass or any name of the like. However, Sakura just stood back eyeing them wearily and slipped back into her seat when everybody sat down.

They were all enjoying Shikamaru's match with the fan lady Temari.. They laughed with at his constant fleeing and were amazed by his ingenious counters. It seemed each time Temari tried to attack Shikamaru had a mover ready to counter it. The match in all consideration was boring as hell frozen over. Temari was a master tactician able to plan each and every more accordingly and how to follow it up while countering the opponent's every move. Shikamaru however was a genius that couldn't be out smarted, every move was a carefully planned and thought out maneuver that could stand up against any attack that Temari could try and make.

Finally the match had reached a standstill with Shikamaru up against the wall waiting. The shadow of the wall was steadily growing, something that both Shikamaru and Temari noticed. Every few minutes Temari took a step back to avoid Shikamaru's ever extending shadow. Then unbeknownst to Temari or anyone Shikamaru's face turned into a twisted smile. His shadow shot forward fast and attacked Temari from every angle as it divided to catch her. She dodged left then right and stepped back. She then froze and her body shook violently as she tried to resist the chilling presence that swirled around her. Shikamaru smirked "Surprised, let me help you understand"

Shikamaru cranked his neck back as if he was looking over his shoulder. Temari's eyes widened at what she saw, the tunnel, that little tunnel that the Naruto boy had created was the secret to her enemy's success. He planned this from the beginning he just had to, very move he made was perfectly coordinated to move her into this exact place.

Then Shikamaru mimed picking up and folding Temari's fan making her mimick and perform the action. He pretended to sling it over his back and walked forward. Temari mirrored each action unwillingly as she was forced forward to the center of the arena.

Temari stood on in fear of what may happen, she hasn't seen that Kin girl since they took her to the infirmary. Something happened to Kin and she didn't want to end up the same(But honestly if she did know she would want to). Shikamaru raised his arm up into the air. Fearfully she looked to her own arm to see it there was anything in her palm. She was thankful when she found it to be empty. She looked on as if she was unsure of what was going on until "I quit, I'm out of charka" Shikamaru said as he released his jutsu " I would have lost my next match for sure" he added as he walked off the field.

Up in the stands there were various mumbles, some applauding his foresight, some dismissing him for his laziness, but the only ones that mattered were the ones of the judges who approved of his strategic thinking and planning.

However it was a different story for Naruto. "Ahh that lazy ass, probally thought out the longest plan he could just so he could forfeit without being called a coward" he accused.

"Yes it would seem that way" Kyle said as he observed the field "but in the long run it may be best, didn't you mention that something big was going to go down today"

"yeah I did ,didn't I?" Naruto realized as he was put on guard.

Up in the Kages booth it was a different story, four of the five Kages were all their assembled to watch the competitors and identify a threat. The Mizukage and the Raikage sat in their provided seats, their guards by their sides, while the Hokage and the Kazekage discussed the plight of their competitors and the Uchiha's tardiness. "Sarutobi I beg you to reconsider disqualifying the Uchiha's match" said the KAzekage, I would very much like to see him battle my son, Garra" he stated.

"I disagree whole heartedly Kazekage a ninja must be on time, never late never early, the uzumaki boy exemplifies that perfectly" said the Raikage in his firm and coarse tone.

"I'm afraid that I have to agree with the Raikage to do so otherwise would show blantant favoritism" Hiruzen said clear as day as he stood up from his chair to make an announcement.

"By accordance with the laws set down by the five Kages during the first chunin exam, Sasuke Uchiha has been disqualified for halting the progress of this tournament" Hiruzen announced as a hateful look entered the eyes of the Kazekage.

The crowd roar in disapproval at the uchiha's disqualification as the kages looked on impassively. "Now lets move on to the next round" hiruzen shouted as he sat back down.

Naruto ran out of the stands and jumped over the railing into the field while garra used his sand teleportation.

The two combatants stood in the center of the field before a storm of leaves kicked up, revealing Sasuke and Kakashi standing back to back with the smug look on his face. The people cheered while the officials simply groaned. "Get off the field Uchiha you missed your match" Naruot shouted as small roars of outrage began to spring up from the uchiha's flashy entrance.

"Get on with the match"

"Come on punch his face in"

"Get that coward off the field I lost a lot of money on his match"

Shouts like these rang out from all corners of the stadium, most of them from angry gamblers looking to make a quick buck. Sasuke growled as he approached Naruto in an attempt to take his place on the field before Kakashi grabbed his shoulder. "Come on, there is nothing you can do" And with those words Sasuke grudgingly left the field.

Naruto and Garra Stood at opposing sides of the field staring at each other with a fierce intensity that promised only pain. However, Naruto was tired and very much so, but years of avoiding people intent on killing him had cultivated a skill to keep himself co ol an calm. If he was exhausted he had no tell, but thecould only hide it so much before it became obvious. But across the field, Garra was still fresh, it would take more then what he had at his disposal. The again if he could just push himself he could probally win. It was just proof that he was a fool who couldn't pace himself, he had burned himself to much during Neji's match.

Meanwhile an Anbu watching the match up brought his hands up into a sign. The discrete signal he had made was seen by a small man who then got up and ran to the bathroom. Another man ran out of the bathroom and out of the stadium before unfurling a scroll which sent a flare up into the air.

The crowd looked up at the sky to see a large flare light up the sky. They gasped in shock as feathers then began to fall from the sky. The crowds began to fall into a deep sleep that was simply divine. Garra saw the feathers and his face distored into an expression of wicked crulty. His sand began to take the form of a suit of armor of sorts, before it consumed itself and took a more raccoon shape. "**YOU" **Said a clearly possessed voice "** MOTHER WANTS YOUR BLOOD" **Shouted Garra as a hand of sand flew at him with so much speed that it went unseen.

Naruto clenched his eyes shut intent on ignoring any pain, but he felt none. He looked forward to see that the arm had stopped merely inches from his face. In his panic he had broken his calm state, leaving him exhausted and panting. He saw that Sasuke had used a lighting jutsu to pierce that sand raccoon shel of Garra's. The possessed garra growled and swung his arm to the side throing Sasuke into a wall. When he did Naruto manage to regain his calm and forced himself to move. Garra looked for him before going ballistic and piercing a hole in the wall and escaping into the under ground pillars. Naruto cursed "Shit if he turns thos pillars to sand then all of Kohona will be destroyed" He watched as Sasuke followed Garra carelessly, and swore again.

Naruto dived down into the endless field of pillars only to find himself in the tunnels. "I don't like were this is going"

Meanwhile, The Hokage and the other Kages were surrounding the Kazekage. "The jig is up…Orochimaru" he said.

The eyes of the Kazekage widened and then quelled. "So Kin did tell you my plans, no matter you can't win I have devised away to bring this village down" Orochimaru shouted as he peeled his disguise of. His eyes darted around nervously, he could probally take on the hokage by himself but he would need help f he were to battle the other two. Then he remembered his back up plan, with a single twitch the sound four were in position. He saw the Anbu rushing towards him and smirked. The sound four erected a barrier around the Kages. One Anbu couldn't stop and slammed into the wall. He was disintegrated insantly.

The other Kages tried to attack but orochimaru used his most none skill, his slippery and narrow dodges that gave him just enough room to counter. Each of them were thrown aside with ease. It was however to be expected as Orochimaru was widely known, not for his knowledge of jutsu which was impressive, but for his ability to counter almost any physical attack. Orochimaru was an unparalleled master of taijutsu, granted he had very limited knowledge on the subject, but he knew every possible use of the moves he use. Orochimaru looked around him and started to break a mental sweat. Then he got an idea, when the other kages tried to rush him again, a tactic which he scoffed at, He threw them back with as much force as he could. He ran through the hand seals for the jutsu he had originally intended to use to gain an advantage, now he was using it to even the odds.

Coffins rose from the ground each of them with a symbol on the front. They were labeled 1,2 and 4. When the first coffin opened it was revealed to be the First Hokage, Hiruzen then had a shocking revelation. "We can't let him open that last Coffin" he shouted as he threw ten shuriken and then with the Shadow Shuriken Jutsu turned them into a hundered.

The third coffin was sealed before it could open as the second coffins lid hit the ground. Orochimaru stood behind the two coffins smirking" Well Sensei it looks like the odds are even…the question is who's are better" his dark laugh echoed throungh the Kages battle ground.

Naruto was running through the scaffoldings on the pillars looking for any sign of Garra and Sasuke. He could only find a trail of sand which reeked of blood and death. He followed it and followed it as fast as he could, but it seemed that every time he picked up his speed his targets doubled theres. When he finally found them Garra had turned into some mutant raccoon and Sasuke was dodging left and right trying to make some space. Naruto sighed as he jumped over the rail and tried to kick Garra in the back of the head, however garra's sand flung him back into a wall hitting a switch.

A few sections of the ceiling began to fall in an orderly stair formation. Sasuke quickly got out of the way diving near Garra's sand. Garra looked up towards the open exit and hurriedly ran up with Sasuke following him. Naruto was standing up exhausted from the running after all that fighting He looked up to see no one there and a slowly rising staircase "Shit they always try and get away" Naruto said as he leapt onto the rising staircase.

When he saw the landscape he was confused about where he was, until he saw the entire village looming over the edge. If he remembered correctly then the villages emergency evacuation bunkers would be near by. Close enough that if someone destroyed the hokage's monument that they would be crushed under the rubble. He came to the revelation that orochimaru planned to destroy not the village but the villagers, using Shukaku as a way to destroy them all. He then heard a large noise like a landslide. He turned around to see a giant mass of sand climbing into the sky. "Oh Shit" it was a phrase that summed up that moment perfectly.

Orochimaru stood across from the Kages with the first and second standing beside him. The roof had become a literal minutare jungle. The Mizukage was busy trying to counter the Second while the Raikage was taking care of the first. However, they were wearing down as no matter how hard they were hit the Zombie's just reformed from some dust that just appeaed from nowhere. Orochimaru was laughing as he watched the exhausted Kages stand across from panting from trying to cross the hazourdous field of vines and stop the evil man. Sarutobi had summoned Enma and was now using the Cage to protect him and the others. "What do we do" Asked the mizukage.

"Yeah Old man, this guy is your student you have to know at least one weakness" Exclaimed the Raikage loud enough for the Snake to hear.

"OH I assure you I have no Weakness" Orochimaru replied in his slicked coiled voice that was so much like a snakes you would think he stole it from one.

"That's it" Hiruzen whispered "You two keep those shells of my teachers busy, if you can try and destroy the Kunai in the back of his head, I'll take Orochimaru down hopefully for good" He said as he released the cage and charged forward with his bostaff.

When the first and second tried to stop them a blur tackled them out of the air and on to the ground. The blur jumped and a torrent of lava impacted with their skulls. Hiruzen smirked as he too jumped into the air in an attempt to nail Orochimaru on the head. The staff hit a blade, held by a smirking Orochimaru. "I told you Sensei I would kill you here"

Hiruzen laughed as he pushed his staff down forcing Orochimaur's down towards his shoulder. "I never had a doubt you would Orochinaru, but I never said you could without a little souvenir"

Orochimaru's eye's widened as the blade was shoved back through his arm effectively severing it. The blade fell and Orochimaru tried to catch it only to cut off two fingers that touched the blade. He grimiced as his jutsu dispelled itself. He pulsed his charka and disappeared along with the other four ninja, leaving only the Kages and Enma. Hiruzen fell to the floor clutching his chest."Hiruzen" Shouted the worried monkey king.

"Don't worry about me, just please tell them I died by nature's hand not Orochimaru's, all those years of smoking have finally caught up with me and now of all times hehe" Hiruzen huffed through his tired lungs "Guess this is it huh, but everything ends and I'm glad it's finally come"

And with those words were the last os Hiruzen Sarutobi.

Sasuke was climbing up the pillar of sand dodging tendrils that lashed out trying to piece his flesh and throw him off his climb. Unfortunately it was getting harder and harder to climb as the sand expanded suddenly and was lashing out and around like it was forming a pattern making it difficult to get higher as he would back step and roll to get out of the way. When he managed to near the top the pillar suddenly jutted out leaving him upside down, He clinged on to the surface and carefully walked forward before more sand began to jut out overhead and began warping itself into a lower jaw. Sasuke Panicked and ran forward as a Tongue of sand tried to get him. He jumped down to the bottom of the mouth and jumped over the teeth. He grabbed the chin and powered his arms enough to throw himself up onto the nose of the forming beasts. Two lumps of Sand began to rise up from the top of the pillar as a single bump rose with it. The two lumps stopped and opened up to reveal two large black eyes with star shaped iris, they were icked and demonic eyes that scared him. Then the lump of sand turned into its own little pillar, the sand fell off to reveal Garra as a part of this large sand sculpture. Sasuke glared as he fired up his new move, the chidori. Sand began to gathering front of Garra to protect him. Sasuke then decided to charge his Chidori with as much charka as possible. I t went from lightning streaming from his palm into a white glowing orb. He ran forward and slammed it into the wall. The energy broke back into lightning and pierced the wall but also streamed off lighting the sky. The pulse of the orb sent Garra and thus the raccoon to fly back.

Meanwhile, Naruto had ended up behind the raccoon and was trying to think of a way up. Suddenly the shadow shifted, the raccoon was falling backwards. Naruto looked up to see the rear end of the raccoon rapidly approaching him. "AHH COME ON"

While Naruto was being sat on an exhausted Sasuke was jumping back and forth dodging sand. It coiled like a snake and flung itself, it tried pulling him into the creature, it even tried to open up a hole on the top of its head into its mouth. All the while Garra's manical laugh resinated clearly through the open air. It irritate Sasuke so much that he jumped off, only to realize tha he wouldn't be able to stick the landing in his exhausted state. He hung limply trying bring forth as much charka as he could. While he did so a blur dashed through the air catching him. He found himself being helped onto a tree branch , looking to his side he found Naruto standing triumphantly as well as angry. "Thanks" Sasuke grudgily offered.

"You better be I got sat on by this thing just to help you" Naruto mumbled loud enough for Sasuke to hear.

"What…you now what never mind" Sasuke said as he kneeled down panting "That last attack wore me out, and it did nothing dammit" he growled out in anger.

Naruto didn't reply as he batted away a tendril of sand that tried to attack them with a giant cross shaped thing. He held it like a cross bow with a large number of shuriken place on it. Naruto looked exhausted an was growing even more tired as the cross began to glow brighter and brighter. "Star Cross-bow" He shouted.

The Star bolts flew off the large cross and slammed into the raccoon with a large force. Naruto was on his knee smirking but it faltered when he saw the raccoon expel the stars. He jumped off the branch with Sasuke as a pillar of sand slammed into the tree destroying it entirely. "What do I do…?"

"And then what Naruto and then What" Asked Stan who had his arms wrapped wendy who was listening Intently.

Naruto laid in a hospital bed various parts of his body covered in bandages. He laughed weakly "well it wasn't easy I'll tell you first I tried to use the Star cross bow again this time with explosion notes, it managed to shake up the racoon a bit but it did nothing but by me time while it reassembled, when It did Garra forced himself to sleep letting Shukaku" Naruto said as he sighed "So I Summoned Gamabunta to even out the size advantage, at first I got some toad kid called Gamakichi but when I summoned Gamabunta he helped me because Kichi was his son. We fought for about five minutes before Bunta said that it would end with us in a sand tomb if he couldn't grip Shukaku so I turned us into Kyuubi, Bunta grabbed him and I Jumped on to the sand pile punched Garra and woke the Bastard up" Naruto finished.

Stan was on the edge of his seat "THEN WHAT"

"Ahh come on man let me sleep, the sooner I do the sooner I can leave the hospital" Naruto begged as he yawned.

"Alright man, lets go Wendy" Stan said as he escorted Wendy out.

"Finally" Naruto said as he laid back and relaxed.

A flash of light blanketed the room and Naruto was gone.

**END**

**Oh What happened to Naruto now**

**So did you like that ending, I hope you did. I thought I should try something different for the ending.**


	10. Escape from Autumn

**Chapter 10: Escape from Autumn**

The room was dark and wet, water was dripping from the pipes in the ceiling. Puffs of steam would erupt from pipes scattered through the walls. A red glowing shield surrounded a small metal bar cage. It was obviously made to be secure and it did his job. Groaning could be heard from a cell the sat in the middle of the room. It was Naruto, who was strapped down to the table using some metal rings. Several beings surrounded the cage. One of them shuffled over to the side and pressed a button.

From the ceiling of the cage a bolt of lightning struck the metal chair sending volts through it prisoner. Naruto convulsed as the bolts passed through him, waking him in the process. The beings that surrounded his cage started laughing in every sort of tone one could think of. Naruto who was still coming to just heard a blur of low pitched echoing with a taunting voice. "What's going on" He shouted thinking he had been moved into a different hospital bed.

"Oh I see your awake" Came one of the voices distorted by the barriers between them "That's good, I'd hate for the interplanetary species recreation to loose their latest subject" Came the voice, with each second the voice became more clear and more cynical.

"The what?" came Naruto's response, still weak in his haze.

"Oh yes that's right, you don't know" the voice said smugly "It seems that me and my associates were wasting resources trying to discreetly gain a foot hold on your planet, because as it appears each Village or township only cares for itself, at least in the place you humans call the badlands, so we take out a village establish a base and spread rumors that it was destroyed by raiders or something of the like" The voice continued as it gained a buzzing tone " Then from there we spread out taking out cities one by one and then we take your planet, which will make you an endangered species worth millions of Fgraffyures(1) on the black market or otherwise" The shifting of tones was starting to halt, a sign that the after effects of being hit by lightning were disappearing.

"Your gonna what" Naruto asked shocked, as his eyes tried to regain focus.

"Oh it doesn't matter now, afterall there's nothing you can do to stop us now" the voice said as it and the other people that were with him walked off.

It was about this time that Naruto's senses were beginning to return to him. He still couldn't see al that clearly as the room was dark, but he could see the bars and the strange thing that was dangling overhead. Naruto tried to move his arm to find them both bolted to a table, as well as his legs. His clothes had been taken away and replaced with new ones. He now wore a pair of light brown pants as well as a beige vest that was tied close with a brown belt. He also had two bracers on his arms that were chafing under the steel clamps. His eyes hurt as did everything, but his eyes hurt the most. His vision then flashed with a strange blue haze, and in that instant Naruto pulled his arms up and broke through the metal bindings leaving his wrist sore. He tried to lift his feet up but found that he couldn't. He bent himself around the metal table as best he could looking for a switch. He couldn't find one in his limited range of movement. If one was actually on the platform it was most likely at the foot or at the head. Naruto laid back down with his arms behind his head thinking. He wondered how he gotten into this mess, he wondered why they wanted him so badly, why not kyle who said that he killed Cylar 117. Of course according to Kyle Cylar 117 also said that of the council of thirty he was the weakest. However, that left the question of what was the council of thirty. Judging by the way Kin and Kyle had described Cylar 117 the council wasn't human in origin. So that begged the question, Are his captors the council of thirty. It made sense since the council of thirty was apparently out to claim earth as their own. Add in the fact that he had never heard of a Fgraffyure and he was pretty sure he had been abducted.

So now he needed to get out of here, but it would practically be impossible to get off this…whatever it was without traversing the void of space. He had no doubt that he could find a ship somewhere on board this thing as it seemed to be a base of operations. He only hoped that he could find a way there, or off the table before they decide he's not worth the risk of transporting. He tugged his legs up hoping that the leg restraints were weak. No such luck, Naruto was stuck. Naruto started thinking quickly, if his captors were an alien species then they most likely didn't chakra proof these metal restraints. He charged two of his fingers with all the chakra he could muster at the moment and sharpened it into a blade. Dragging it along the metal restraints a snapping clang echoed through the room for each leg. Charging his legs he broke through the weakened restraint which kept him bound to the table. He flung his legs over the edge and climbed off satisfied, one problem down about two more to go.

Naruto looked up at the strange needle that jutted out of a hole in the ceiling and how it sparked from time to time. He then looked passed the transparent red wall to see simple door, his safest and easiest bet. However he still had to deal with the red wall, after all if it was containing him it must be dangerous. He walked up to two of the iron bars and tested their strength. He found two that were weak and gave them a hard tug, pulling them out of the cages outline. He held them forward against the glowing red wall and watched as they began to heat up and turn red themselves. Naruto pulled the two heated rods back and stuck the ends together while they were still red hot. The two bars became on long pole. He tried pushing the pole through the red wall but anything that made it to the other side simply melted away. That's when he saw the small ridge on the floor where the red wall rose out from. "Yes" Naruto exclaimed.

Taking the pole and placing it up against the ridge and then propping it on the lightning rod thing naruto stepped back as he pulled out another bar and threw it at the control panel like a javeline. It bust through the barrier like a glob of water from a hose and melted the console. However, that's all that was needed as the lightning rod shot off as much wattage as it could. The power traveled down the pole and into the small ridge which blew up. The room then became dark andthen began glowing red. A strange insect like voice began to resonant through the room " All Grduas Rpeort to Posirn clel A-9, Posirn Berak In Porgsers"(2) the voice said strangely.

Naruto didn't really understand it but given his situation he had a pretty good idea. Intead of taking the door he leapt up into the gap around the lightning rod. There were several halls up there all of them had wires that completely covered the walls as well as a few breakers here and there. Naruto got an idea and unsealed from his arm his emergency roll explosive notes, his specialty was Subterfuge after all so he knew the situation plan by heart. Get captured, alive hopefully, be dragged into the prison cells and escape, then you use the Explosive tags that you hid on your person and place them every where you think necessary then get out of there.

He pulled one Tag out from the roll and slammed it on the wall and simply left without detonating, he knew nothing about where he was and for all that mattered it could have been dangerous to set it off with him still near by. Naruto then continued down the path lighted by the glowing blue pipes on the wall. It was hard as the blinking red lights disoriented him in the normally blue halls. The red light stopped as did the alarm; most likely they moved the priority area thinking that he had escaped further into the ship. Naruto then heard voices speaking in their unintelligible language. He needed a place to hide. To his right he saw a vent, he pried off the cover and climbed in quickly.

The people, if you could call them that, passed by and closed off the vent saying something in their strange tongue. Naruto had no choice but to continue climbing through the vents, it grew harder to breath the further he went. The vents were getting stuffy and harder to navigate as they got smaller. Naruto passed over an overhead vent and smirked. He had found a way out, slamming his feet down on the vent he dropped down into a strange room. One wall was covered with a odd screen that lowed faintly, a keyboard rested below the wall. The screen then light up "Oh hello how may I help you" came a voice from the screen.

"What are you?" Naruto asked as he approached the large object.

"I am the T-400 AI system my main objective is to assist whoever enters this room" The voice said echoing.

"Whoever?"

"Yes, its not like any prisoner can escape from the cell blocks and get in here right?" T-400 said.

"Yeah right… listen I'm going to need your help getting out of here" Naruto asked the big screen.

"Why is my assistance required?" The monotone computer voice asked.

Naruto scratched the back of his head and quickly thought of a ruse to fool the computer. "Well not all of the people on this ship agree with the council's decision to inducted my race in and as such formed a splinter cell, they plan using the station as a flag ship to destroy my planet which is fairly primitive compared to your technology"

"Such things are outlawed by the Council of thirty and the intergalactic alliance, I will help you take out the ships systems, doing so should keep this station inoperable and restrict the launching of the battle cruisers long enough for the splinter cell to be dealt with" T-400 stated as a panel and strange closet rose out of the floor "Put on that suit and gear up then place your hands onto the bio scan imprinter"

Naruto did as he was told and felt a surge of energy rush through him. He then heard the voice of T-400 coming from the helmet "I can't allow the splinter cell to capture me, if they do this organization is lost"

Naruto felt gittery like his body wanted to move in a way that was unfamiliar to him, he felt like the shock from t-400 had something to do with it. "Why is it so difficult to move body the way I want to?"

"Because your thinking to hard, I ingrained a program into your nervous system, for the moment you have the muscle memory of a fully trained gray warrior, however since your not a gray or any other species in my databanks and I could not synchronize you with the system I could only glaze it over, you only have the skills for the next four hours, just enough time to get off the ship" T-400 stated.

"Great so what do I do now" Naruto asked.

"Destroy the computer screen behind it should be a service tunnel leading to the aerial flight training deck"

Naruto did as he was told, he found the glowing blue tunnel behind the screen and jumped in and followed it. He stayed on alert for any patrols of these hallways making sure to keep as silent as he could as he walked by other rooms. As he went along he kept casually placing explosive tags in general areas around the tunnels. Naruto hoped that these tunnels were linked to a lot of things, because he knew that if he blew up one tunnel it could probally backlash the entire system, at least that was what T-400 said.

It was about thirty minutes till he made it to the flight center. When he first entered the area Naruto ended up walking out onto a walkway that seemed to be part of the support system for this giant orb thing that was in the middle of the room. Naruto walked down the walkway placing explosive tags onto it and then into the center pillar and the other walkway.

When Naruto finished his devious task he looked down to see that the ships looked like fighters if the light weapons were anything to go by. However, he also ships that were probally troop transport and bombing. The main differences were the weapon systems that T kept pointing out, but Naruto was a fast learner and was quickly memorizing each type of ship that was being pointed out. While looking over the edge Naruto heard a whooshing sound from behind. Naruto turned around to see a ship heading right for him shooting. Naruto ducked and rolled but the fighter was detrimined to strike him at any cost and slammed itself into the platform. It blew up and the force of the explosion pushed Naruto off the now damaged but still intact walkway and into the open air.

"Quickly grab on to a ledge or a ship, you won't survive the landing" said T.

Naruto looked around quickly looking for his saving grace only to hit it dead on. He landed on the front of one of the bombers which was now swerving around to shake him off. One of the crew members even opened the boarding hatch to shoot at him. Naruto ducked in an attempt to dodge the bullets but it made him more vulnerable to fall off so Naruto decided to get a little risky. He jumped into the air, but not very high and grabbed on to his shooter and punched his skull hard enough to crack it. He pulled him out and climbed in the ship with the gun the other guy was using in hand. He shot the pilot and threw him into the back and took control of the ship. The only problem was that he had no idea how to pilot one of them. He grabbed the controls, or what he thought was the controls and just let his instincts take over.

He saw a ship coming in from the left and barreled right. Unfortunately the ship was able to pull in to tale him, good news was that it was a drop ship and while it was heavily armed, it was also slow. Naruto was still trying to think of a way to take out the drop ship when he got an idea. He went into a dive bomb and set the coordinates for the bottom of the pillar. Looking up Naruto could see more fighters and bombers being dispersed into the area. Naruto knew that he would have a hard time getting out of there. He slammed a button that was right next to the self destruct and hoped that it was something good. The seat leaned back until naruto was practially standing up. The back of the ship then opened up into the burning engine which shut off. The two sides of the chair fell to reveal a jet pack strapped to the back of the armor on his back. It blasted off sending him out of the ship between the two back up engines which sent the ship into the pillars bottom.

Meanwhile Naruto was still rocketing through the air, towards the ship behind him. It fired around and Naruto moved to dodge. He scrapped by underneath the ship and grabbed a strange hatch. He pulled it back, opening it in midair heading straight down. An object slid out and propelled it self through the air and naruto climbed into the hatch. He could hear voices above him " Rleaod the Cgrahe Cnonan" suddenly Naruto heard something click. "Rleaod The Crhage cannon, now, we need to launch a mine while he still using the pack" apparently T-400 turned on some sort of translating device.

Light flooded in with a creaking noise and Naruto acted grabbing the thing punching it and pulling it down to where he was. He then climbed up and closed the hatch. Suddenly he heard a noise that sounded like the air pushed something out, Opening the hatch again he found the man who he had thrown in there gone. Looking out the window however he could tell that the man was being rescued from the Zero gravity area. So he grabbed something that looked like the device that he had seen earlier and loaded it into the tube. With the same vacuumed air noise it was jettisoned at the man taking him and the three ships that were gathered around and passing by him. Naruto laughed at the brutal tactic before he heard a click from behind his head. "Don't move human scum" Naruto stood as still as he could before his entire body snapped into a fluid take out. His right foot popped the hatch while his left arm swung around and knocked the gun out its hands. His right arm grabbed the alien's neck and moved him to the floor while the left kicked the hatch up to keep it standing he then threw the alien halfway into the hatch and slammed the door. A snap was heard and naruto opened the hatch, he had broken the spine. He kicked the rest of the alien into the hatch and grabbed its gun. Looking out he saw the body collide with the pursuing ships. It exploded into a red mist clouding their view making one swerve and crash into another. Naruto then climbed his way to the front of the ship. The guard tried to shoot him but failed. Instead Naruto managed to spin him around and get the gun to his back. He pulled the trigger and fired a round through the things stomach and into the pilots head. Lights started going off in his head as he ran toward the back of the ship when the gravity keeping him on the floor shut off. He gripped the nearest thing he could find and climbed up to the charge hatch. Climbing in he jettisoned himself from the doomed ship. He flew at the pursuing ships and landed on the top of another fighter. One of the bombers then tried to shoot him. He jumped off onto another ship and continued his jumping various bomber shooting at him sending various pilots to their graves. It eventually ended with him on a bomber and another ship heading for him. The on coming ship fired and naruto jumped. The ship exploded and naruto grabbed on to the fighter. The ship was turning heading for the center of the room. Naruto knew he had to act now. He slowly made his way to one side of the front of the ship and climbed onto the wing. He looked at the hatch which was right in front of him under his feet. "Hit the joint" ordered T-400.

Naruto did so and the thing popped up, he then used it to swing around and kick the pilot out before he could react. He swung the ship around sharply turning the wing into a blade that went throught the other beings stomach. Naruto then took off for the wall. "So just ram it, right?" he asked.

"Yes, but you have to press the boarding drill or we'll just die" instructed T-400.

Naruto pressed the button and the ships wings bent themselves back. The nose of the ship started spinning and the cockpit became shelled in and bathed in a red light. Naruto could feel the ship excelerate around him, he could also feel it collide with the metal wall. Everything stopped, the area were the nose would be opened up into a hall way. Naruto climbed out and turned around to see half of the ship sticking out of the wall smoking. He placed a tag on it and walked away.

Naruto listened carefully to T's instructions as he placed his explosive tags at various places in the ship. This place was a literall maze, while he had escaped the training area and the prison block he had still yet to get by the barracks ,which he was in right now, the defense systems room, the engine and shielding systems room, and the flight deck. He was going to cut through the engine room to save time but when he reanalyzed the situation he decided that playing Saboteur in there as well would be beneficial.

As he made his way through the halls of the ship he casually placed tags on the doors of the rooms he passed. He was almost caught when he rounded a corner. He was spotted by a patrol and ducked behind the wall he had just turned around. They ran after him, however when the turned the corner there was no sign of him. Naruto had climbed up o the ceiling and waited till they walked by. When they did he dropped from the ceiling and flung several laser disks at them. They didn't even know what hit them.

Naruto then continued down the halls setting traps and what not for any unlucky fellow to trigger them. One of the traps even saved his life. He had placed a spring plate in one of the hallways as he moved on. When he reached the corner he heard the noise of the air being burned and sliced, ducking to the side he saw a plasma lined blade lodge it self into the floor. The alien was holding the sword like a professional and glaring as he pulled it out of the ships floor. The Alien charged at him swinging cutting up the walls, Naruto then realized that if he didn't jump then he would have stepped on his plate. So he did and went right over the plate. However the aliens blade stuck it, the blade was bounced back with such force that it flew back and sliced through the aliens skull.

Then there was the Defense room, it was like a giant tower with hundreds of aliens in consoles. Naruto had ended up at the top most floor, but he needed to be at the bottom. The aliens were frantically scurrying about and carefully surveying screens, most likely they were looking for him. He looked for the exit that was being described by T and found it to be guarded . He would need to get their attention away from that area. They apparently already got the news about his work in the training area as the people were currently trying to get damage reports, and there were watching futige of his ship crashing through the wall, which had knocked out surveillance in the Barracks. He needed to be careful here, but he also needed to disable this place. T said that the engine room had lots of automated security because of how dangerous it was. Naruto knew that if he was to get through that place then he would have get it shut off and disable security. He carefully climbed onto a beam that was linked to the center of the room. Naruto quietly pulled out the vent shaft and placed it aside. HE saw something move in front of his path and dived in. Inside the towering pillar was a gray in this maintenance area, who wore a uniform covered in oil and grease as he carried this little tool thing with him. Naruto jumped him and killed him, another victim to his long list, taking his uniform with him and with a little transformation he was that gray.

He decided to keep playing saboteur for now as he placed ghost charges, or at least that was what T called them, along the walls of this pillar. He then reached the bottom where added another charge and walked out through the door. He looked around and saw a gray that had a unique badge. "Sir I need you to turn off the engines for a while, there have been some reports that say the engine may be breaking down and I've got to confirm it" Naruto said.

The alien only heard the normal language that every one else spoke around here. He turned towards Naruto and said "Very well" He waved to one gray at a terminal who shut off the engine. The being then held out his hand for Naruto to shake it "I wish you luck , those engines can be a tricky thing to deal with on or off" he said.

Naruto took his hand and shook it leaving behind a charge, when he was almost to the door he set them off. The captain saw a red glow and heard a beeping noise, looking down he saw it coming from his hand "Oh shi.." and then the entire room erupted into chaos.

Explosions were all that could be heard of the once grand defense room from where Naruto was in the engines. He was currently placing more and more tags around the engines and fuel lines, while avoiding the shield core. T had told him that destroying the shield core would hinder the spread of the damage making the environment open; if he kept the shield on then it would be like the ship destroys itself. Naruto however did put a tag on the shield stabilizer though, it would cause the ship to suffer a major energy backlash, which would cause a premature launch of the escape pods during the chaos, according to T. He then left the engine room through a ladder that T had pointed out that would lead him directly to the flight deck.

Naruto climbed up the ladder and moved a panel blocking his path out of the way. When he got up he found himself on the flight deck surrounded by ships. Naruto looked at his watch, he had only Ten minutes left before the Nerve enhancements wore off and he was left dead like a fish out of water. He looked for a ship that he was familiar with but he saw none, all of the ships out here seemed more advanced and more liberate versions of the ships from earlier. "Look for the black carrier with an bombing equipment and larger fighter style engines (Picture the space ship that Starving Marvin finds in the Starvin Marvin in space episode) that is the experimental ship that the council was trying to put together, it should have everything we need and more" Said T-400.

Naruto nodded and headed down the halls running and jumping and ducking to avoid detection from any pilots. Eventually he found a hall of them twenty eight in all, in fact the ships looked awfully familiar. The it hit him "Barbra Streisand had one of these when she invaded the village of winds surrounding the tunnel of god!" He exclaimed a he climbed in one.

"Yes, Cylar 117 also had one of these however we have yet to find it since he left it on the planets surface during his attempted invasion" T said as he instructed Naruto on how to take off.

When they got the ship off the ground a panic started as various alien pilots ran to the area. Naruto put the ship into its highest gear and rocketed toward the exit of the hangar. Along the way naruto released the controls and set off a pulse of chakra. The pulse reached the first explosion tag causing a chain reaction to take place. The fuel pipes for the engine were next as they started lighting a trail through the ship. Rooms began exploding and the training center fell of its axis and blasted a hole through the bottom of the ship. Huge explosion rocked the ships as one by one they tore the entire base apart. Then the shields went allowing the power to reach naruto sending his ship rocketing and crashing onto the earth. When the ship hit the ground naruto passed out.

Naruto came too several hours later in a ship that was still intact but highly damaged. Sparks were flying everywhere from exposed cables. He pulled himself from the wreckage slowly and smirked when he saw the ship was still usuable. He put his hand on the ear of his helmet "T-400 are you still there" no answer. "T-400 I repeat are you there" nothing.

Then a voice echoed through the Helmet "You wanna get high?"

End

**That's right T-400 turned into Towlelie, T-400 is his original designation from the episode he was introduced. His full title was the T-400 smart towel.**

**Yeah I couldn't think of a better way to break up some of the more plot related action…**

**And because this is my tenth chapter I will be going on a slight hiatus. I will still update this fic but it will be a while before I do as I usually stock chapters and then post one a week. I promise that I won't forget this, but I desperately need this time to work on a book I'm writing. I will still write more chapters but I just won't be updating till June. **

**So I hope all of you will continue to read when I post chapter 11 on June first and so you know I'm still taking ideas for an original arc, and if any of you out there want to contribute there own chapter feel free to do so, and they will be posted under Hiatus Filler: (chapter name) with full credits to you, this is your chance to mess around with the characters as much as you want so take it and I will not turn it down. I want to know what you think I can do with this story, so just email it to me or use doc X on the profile page and you will get your chance to mess with and possible add to Dead man still walking just make sure to add your pen name so you can get credit for it. This is also a chance for you to show me what direction You think this fan-fiction should be going **

**So Yeah until June 1 ,Thoughtseeker Signing off**


	11. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE

**Chapter 11: The Search for the slug lady****, the gang just hangs**

Naruto and Jiraya were at the Ichiraku's ramen stand. Jiraya had told Naruto that he had important news and that he would tell him over ramen. Not being one to pass up free food Naruto agreed.

"I'm telling you I was captured by aliens" Naruto exclaimed.

"Sure you were" Said Jiraya as he ate his ramen.

"I've a wrecked spaceship to prove it" Naruto said as he poked Jiraya with his chopsticks.

"You also said you have an intellegant free thinking AI that just wants to get high all the time" Jiraya said as his eyes twitched.

"Come on I'll show you the ship if you just follow me" Naruto d as he grabbed jirayas arm and tried to drag him off, only to be dragged off in the opposite direction.

"No time for that now!" Jiraya exclaimed as he ran towards the village gates.

Kin and Wendy were hanging out a popular little warehouse that many of the girls in the village had taken over called "the place". The girls also knew of the boys "Place" which was very similar to theirs. Some girls bring old clothes that they need to get rid of and sell them here. Some even brought trinkets they looted or found on missions for the same purpose. A group of girls had even built a series of stalls so they could be displayed in a dignified manner.

Right now Kin and Wendy were sitting at the only restaurant that was set up in the place. They didn't serve a wide range of foods, but it was arguably one of the best places to get a drink in this entire village. They were chatting away like they usually did when they were just hanging out when they heard a commotion coming from the other side of the warehouse, they could also see a number of people rushing over to see what was going on. "Thank you for coming fellow members of The Konoha Kuniochi Association, now that the village is in a weakened state giving us the perfect opportunity to get what we want, a better ranking system for missions" Said a voice as Kin and Wendy approached the crowd.

As the two great closer to the voice they found it to be Tenten "we have heard many Kuniochi claim that they were cheated out of money for a seduction mission because someone on the council is switching around mission ranks on Kuniochi to get a few extra bucks, well no more! I say we strike, with no village leader we can get a direct audience with the council, which include the people who are ranking these missions, and we can get a more immediate result" Tenten announced as the gathered crowd cheered." However we need a President to lead this group and we have gathered several of this villages _High _Ranking young Kuniochi to run, including myself" Tenten said.

While Kin and Wendy didn't really care about the issues of Kuniochi after all neither of them were registered as one of this villages Kunoichi. However hen they noticed that Sakura was one of the candidates they realized that something was up, after all more then half of this group was filled with Sasukes Fangirls. Sakura being their club president would be a shoe in for office, and that evil gleam in her eye did not promise anything good. Kin poked Wendy in the shoulder, whispering in her ear Wendy's smile became a mischievous smirk.

After Tenten had finished her speech Sakura stepped up to the micro phone. Before she could say a word two figures leapt up and started running towards her on thin air. "FORE" the two figures shouted before they busted Sakura's face with two golf clubs.

Stan, Kyle, Cartman and butters were hanging out in another warehouse listening to one of the bands that was always playing here. "Hew new guys" said a gruff almost animal voice.

The four looked up from their table, which they were staring at as they zoned out and into the music. Kiba stood in front of them flanked by Shino, Shikamaru and Choji. He was glaring at them "So your those guys that Naruto found out in the badlands right, huh your all just a bunch of scum" Kiba said as he slammed his hands onto the table.

"Scum, you think just because we're from the badlands were scum" Butters said as he stood up, shocking the others at the table. Butters grabbed Kiba's collar and threw him to the ground " I can kick your ass any day of the week so just go home now dog boy" Butters growled out as an insane gleam flashed through his eyes.

Stan, Kyle and Cartman just stared at Butters like he was, and boy was he, crazy. "What the hell was that?" they all shouted in unison.

"Well without the mask Chaos can't control me but I can control him" Butters said as he lifted up his hair to show a weird scar that had a symbol tattooed over it "This is the mark of two minds, every person with two different minds has on of these"

The other boys still looked at him like he was crazy, and they weren't all that far from the truth.

Naruto trogged along the beaten dirt road following Jiraya as they journeyed for the town of …. something. "I'm so goddamn bored, don't you have anything that you can teach me" Jiraya sighed and turned around.

"You know I don't even remember why I brought you along in the first place" Jiraya said as he stopped to think " Yeah that should keep you busy, listen and watch kid cause I'm only gonna do this once" Jiraya said as he held out his hand and a spiraling ball of wind condensed into it "this is the Spiraling sphere the famed jutsu that allowed the fourth hokage to win the battle of stone when he used it with his flying thunder god technique, it's a great honor to learn this technique so I expect you to try your best and keep queit when I'm giving instruction under stood" Jiraya said his voice giving an unshakable commanding tone.

"Yes sir" Naruto said as he patiently waited for Jiraya to continue.

"Now come on, we have to get to the next town, the sooner we do the sooner you can start learning the Spiraling Sphere" Jiraya said as he turned around only to see Naruto quite a ways down the road.

"Well what are you waiting for" Naruto shouted back down the dirt road at Jiraya who simply grumbled about hyperactive students.

Kin and Wendy were now out on the town , trying to figure out what the group was going to do. They had enormous funds, and some people with combat experience, so they could form a mercenary company, but the fact that Kohona had numerous skilled shinobi constantly working on jobs that mercenary took up in other villages. Not to mention that the villages forces offered cheaper prices than most mercenary companies, and those that were cheaper were usually unskilled and did more harm than good. However, whatever Naruto decided their little gang should do would be what they end up doing.

As Wendy and Kin continued their conversation they noticed Sakura approaching them with furious expression. When they got a good look at her face they noticed her jaw was wired shut. Kin just stared before turning back to wendy and shouting "It's about damn time someone did something about her big mouth" she said jabbing a finger at Sakura who was now looming towards Kin to beat her head in.

Sakura was stopped by a golf club striking her up side the head. Wendy stood leaning over her club pouting. "You're interrupting our conversation" she said before turning back to Kin "As I was saying, I can walk on wind because of my Zephyrus soul and anybody that I expose to it can do the same exact thing, meaning that Naruto, you, and me are the only three people that can currently wind walk, but its actually a pretty simple thing to do if you have a wind affintity"

Kin nodded before looking down at the floor. She saw a puddle of red forming around Sakura's head. "Do you think we should…you know… do something about her"

Wendy looked at her like she grown a second head "I did do something, I gave her a concussion"

Kin gained a thoughtful look "Yeah I guess we did do something, lets go do some shopping"

Ino then came running up panting "huhhuhhuhu….Some one…What's wrong with Sakura?"

"Oh she offered to help us with our golf game, but she got to close to me during my swing" Wendy said as she smiled brightly.

"Hu….have to say that's a first…But that's not important SOMEONES PUT KAKASHI IN THE HOSPITAL" Ino shouted.

A little while after the guys and thrown Kiba off them he returned with some muscle. He apologized for the scum comment, saying that he was just hazing the new guys in the village. That said he told the gang that they could only hang out at the warehouse if they passed a ritual they called the haze, which was one of two things: a task to prove your worth to everybody, or …well no body really knew what it entailed but all they knew was that it happened on the rooftops somewhere in Konoha. However, whatever it was the guys had to do it was tradional that this happen to every new guy, and they were the new guys.

Kiba and the guys stood infront of a fenced off district of Kohona. An eerie red mist seemed to pool out from under and over the fence. Kiba turned to them "Alright were heading up to the roof tops to fight, if you fall into the red mist consider yourself dead" Kiba said smirking "You see this red mist is one of the remnants of Kyuubi's rampage, it has a very toxic reaction with most people, making their skin dissolve and sending them into fits of insanity before they die just melting away, luckily the infected district as we call it gets smaller every year, they say that in another three years that this place will be clear and habitable, currently its used by the ANBU to train in handling toxic terrain and surroundings and what ever may lurk in them" Kiba said as he lead them to a ladder to the rooftops, as it wasn't a good idea to risk jumping onto the roofs.

"What's that supposed to mean" Butters asked as he was backed by Stan, Kyle, and Cartman.

"Well lets just say that something lurks here and it isn't very friendly" Kiba responded as he pulled himself up into a building.

The group wandered around, they could see and hear shadows just darting around as they made their way to the top of the tower that they had climbed into. When they reached the roof tops Kiba leaped across the gap to the building directly across from them. "This is where we settle the score new guys, if you can just survive here then you can enter the warehouse with no trouble" Kiba says as he crouches down.

"Does everybody do this?" Stan asked as he looked around.

"Just the people that get me for their task" Kiba said as he snarled and lept across with two Kunai in his hands.

Butters body snapped as his fist lached onto kiba's collar and threw him into the building across the street. Kiba went through the wall, which wasn't surprising as the buildings here weren't in the best conditions. Butters then summoned his sythe from his arm and stood at the read while Kyle, Cartman and Stan all ready their weapons apprehensively. "I blame the jew for this…..and the faggots" Cartman said with a pair of claws ready to lash out at anything that attacked.

"Geez Cartman, not that I'm against gay bashing or anything, but are gay people really to blame for us getting into a fight above a toxic mist on the rooftops of this crazy city" Stan said as he grunted at how fast Cartman was to blame it on some group of people.

"Fine….just the Jews" Cartman said flatly.

"Aw come one, really" Kyle said to Cartman as they formed up in a circle.

"Kyle, think the firstborn of Egypt" Cartman shouted as he looked down at the red mist.

Kyle was silent "Fine you win on a technicality fat ass" he mumbled as he looked down at the red mist as well.

Kiba then suddenly lept forth from the building that Butters had thrown him into. The left side of butters face began to twitch as his eye became as black as night a glowed with a light of insanity. He reared back the sythe as Kiba approached and swung forward catching Kiba's collar and swinging him around like a ragdoll as he was flung at the nearest building. A crash was heard as Kiba jumped up through the buildings roof. Moans could be heard echoing through the building, as Kiba laughed. "Hey guys now the real test begins, I'll be waiting at the gate, meet me their in an hour, if you last that long" Kiba said as he leapt across the roofs laughing.

"What did he mean by the real test begins" Kyle said as the moaning grew louder "Where is that coming from?" Suddenly hands erupted from the roof top they stood on. They all leapt back and slashed at them as a group of hideous black inky beings. They all seemed to shadow the person they faced. The gang only had seconds to realize this as the being leapt at them and dragged them into the mist.

The Johnin sensei's of the Kohona twelve all sat in a room observing Kakashi. He had went up against The rogue ninja Itachi Uchiha, the man that single handedly killed his entire family leaving one survivor, His little brother Sasuke. Sasuke was in the room with the Johnin too, however he was unaware of Itachi's part in his sensei's current condition. That was until a Johnin came rushing into the room to confirm the rumors. "IS IT TRUE KAKASHI WAS ATTACKED BY ITACHI?" The johnin practically shouted.

Sasuke's eyes went wide as he ran out of the building. Kurenai just stared at the johnin that had just bursted into the room. "Good God you're an idiot" were the only words that came from her mouth

END PART 1

Okay so its shorter than the others and I had a month to work on this. Give me a break here, Luckily I'm only about ten days from getting out of school so I'll more writing time. The main reason I cut this short was because the next chapter will include.

The guys battle in red mist

Battles with inner demons

A wild Itachi and Kisame appear

A wild Tsunade appears

And finally revealing the secret behind Naruto's ability to revive himself…..Hopefully

But the real kicker is this I'm no longer on Hiatus be glad too because I've thought up some more appearances.

However I will go on Haitus again when I reach the first movie so I can write it without missing anything important. Attention to detail it is very important and really overlooked

And to all of those who think that having Naruto being able to resurrect is overpowering him… I agree. However this ability has limitations that will be revealed when Tsunade explains the Phenomenon .

By the way I will only do the first movie and then maybe one of the shippuden Movies most likely the one with Shion. Then if it comes to it I'll do the movie were Naruto is thrown back in time….don't ask just look it up its like the last Naruto movie or something.


	12. Slug searchin

**Chapter 12: Slug searching part 2**

**Battling an Inner demon**

Stan groaned as he pulled himself up from the crater that he had been thrown into, or was it pulled into; Stan wasn't sure as his head ached with an untold pain. All he did know about his fall that it was several stories and that he had hit a number of things on his way down. As he pulled himself from the crater he noticed that the red mist that surrounded him was extremely thin, but it seemed to condense around every solid thing. He heard a strange cackling like laugh that echoes off the buildings and the ground. Stan tried to find the source only to come face to face with his own shadow.

The Inky blot on the ground was laughing as it extended back and away from Stan effectively separating the two. Shadow Stan went up a wall and walked off the surface, much like how Naruto described how this Haku person could enter and leave mirrors that he had made with his ice powers. It laughed again, only this time it wasn't a cackle but an ordinary, if dark and foreboding, laugh. "What's going on, what are you?"

It just laughed "What am I, WHAT AM I, I am nothing but a shadow Stanley, your shadow" It said laughing as it stepped forward "But it's just so lonely being only a shadow, so boring too. What I want is a body and not just any body, my body, our body Stanley the one that you've been keeping from me Stanley. It's so cold living in the dark ,the darkness you create, always in the way of the light, for once i have a chance to be the one in the light AND I WON'T LET YOU TAKE THAT FROM ME EITHER!" the Shadow shouted before it charged at Stan.

Stan tried to punch him only for the shadow to duck under his arm and go for his back. Fortunately Stan elbowed him in the face and pivoted to face Shadow before kicking him into one of the buildings. The ghastly laughter started up again "Your strong Stanely, but you won't be for long, you can feel it can't you" said the shadow, obscured by the mist and the cloud of dust he created when he entered the building "Your strength is leaving you and comin to me, it knows who the victor will be, and when I win I'll take our whore of a girlfriend into the bedroom and show her who's her master" the shadow laughed out with his ill voice.

Stan growled "Don't call Wendy a whore" as he rushed forward intent on cracking open the shadow's head.

His hand was caught by a grey clawed hand. Through the dust and the mist Stan could see a pair of monstrous eyes glaring at him. The hand pulled him forward and he was head butted by the shadow. He stumbled back as the shadow climbed to his feet and walked forward. As Stan regained balance he saw the shadows heel inches away from his face. A second later Stan ended up crashing through the window of an old butchers shop. Stan cringed at the smell of rotten meat that had been sitting in the shop for years with no one or nothing to eat it. Suddenly the Shadow leaped through the window intent on tackling Stan only to be kicked in the stomach and launched back out the window. Stan rushed behind the counter and began searching for knives. He found two steak knives and a butcher's cleaver, it was all he needed. As soon as the shadow tried to get him by reaching over the counter Stan socked him in the jaw. The shadow then slammed his hand onto the counter as Stan Shoved the knife through its left hand. The shadow howled as it became more beast like and slammed its other hand onto the counter. Stan acted fast and slammed the knife through the right hand. Pinning the shadow to the table Stan raised the clever above his head and slammed it into the beast's shoulder and attempt to pull the blade back out to strike again. The shadow's right arm now hung limp at its side as it continued to struggle trying to break the blades hold. Then as Stan went to bring down the blade on its head only for the blade holding down the left hand to snap leaving a small jagged sliver of metal visible in the shadow's palm, it swiped at Stan making him drop the cleaver and run. The shadow reached over and pulled out the blade in its right hand and walked over to the cleaver picking it up and throwing it through the wall. Stan ducked out of the building and into an alley intent on making his way out of this red mist and away from this beastly version of himself. As he walked out on to the street he saw a wolf like him bounding out of the alley. It pounced and he ducked, letting the beast sail right over him. Stan took off running desperately looking for a way to get out of the mist. He found a balcony about three stories up, it was directly across from a flag pole that was situated at the end of a long row of pegs that jutted out of the building like stepping stones or steps in a staircase. It was his only escape route, he leapt across the pegs with step like jumps and then jumped across the buildings gap and swung himself onto the top of the bar. Looking at the street below he saw the beast circling below waiting for him to fall. Stan smirked as he leapt across the street to the balcony. He landed on one foot and began running. He could see the beast across the street running on the buildings wall. It got ahead and out of sight before it crashed through the window and rolled into the wall. A piece of glass had lodged itself in its eyes as the shadow growled and ran straight at him, Stan did the same. Seconds later as they were about to collide the beast leapt and Stan slide right underneath it to safety. As the beast landed and turned around it laughed as it saw Stan run around the corner and up the stairs.

Stan slammed the door behind him when he got to the roof. He was merely centimeters from the mist as he had reached the top of the cloak. His wounds no longer burned, a good sign. He climbed on top of the roof entry door expecting the beast to come through the door. The floor quaked and cracked as it seemed to be rammed. It was, as when the floor gave way the wolf like shadow leapt up onto the roof and growled. Stan saw the blade still embedded in the left hand and formulated a plan. As soon the as the beast jumped at him Stan went into action. Stan grabbed the limp arm and threw the beast to the ground as he stepped on the left hands wrist he pried what was left of the blade form its hand. He stabbed it into the beast right eye and leapt away waiting for the beast to strike back. As the beast stood on top of the door Stan stood prepared for the attack. The beast began sniffing the air trying to find Stan before looking right at him with it's blind eyes. Again it leapt, with the higher ground and limited space for Stan to move the beast would win. It WOULD, if Stan hadn't planned ahead. A single kick to the handle of the knife of the blade drove it into the beast brain killing it, with no mist to heal it. The buildings began to stretch upwards the mist began to rise and spin around the roof top Stan stood apon. Then the wolf dissipated as if it were just a cloud and it's black mist began to swirl around Stan before the world went dark.

**BREAK **

Stan woke up in a hospital bed surrounded by Kyle, Cartman and Butters. There was also Wendy who was lying on his chest crying. "Wendy?" Stan groaned out.

"Stan your okay" Wendy said tears falling from her eyes like waterfalls as she embraced him.

"Yeah man we thought we lost you when you slipped off the roof, luckily you fell onto one of the balcony's near the roof, but you hit your head pretty hard" said Cartman as he moved towards the door to find a doctor.

Stan returned the embrace "Yeah, I'm okay" he said but his thoughts returned to the darker him 'What I saw was not a dream, I know that much, but why now, why are these dreams happening again'

**BREAK**

Naruto sat in his room pondering many things. He had recently arrived in another city that had gambling, so the target that the perverted hermit and he were tracking was a notorious gambler. The questioning of loan sharks suggest that she was deep in debt and desperate for money to feed her gambling addiction. The fact that she borrowed large amounts of money hinted that she liked playing big stake game or played at the high roller tables. Given that she was also a heavy drinker, according to the pervert, she would most likely be hanging out in a bar away , but not far, from the casinos to avoid the loan sharks debt collectors. To bad he couldn't talk about the target with Ero-sennin as he had left with some women in a purple dress.

Then there was the matter of the Rasengan. He managed to pass the first stage by creating two layered disks, each rotating in a direction countering the other. He then would "fold" them so it expanded into a sphere. So now he was working on power, but he wasn't getting any where. Then it hit him, if he just expanded the inner rings then he would most likely make it powerful enough. Then just as he was about to try his theory out he heard a knocking at the door. He went over to the door and peered through the eye hole. All he saw was an eye that looked vaguely like the Sharingan. The eye began spinning as he heard a voie on the other side say "Tsukiyomi" the eye's symbols continued to spin and spin.

Eventually Naruto pulled away from the door dizzy from the spinning eye. As he managed to shake it off he walked over to his bag and pulled out a golf club that Kin had packed for him, incase he wanted to do some "Golfing". Walking over to the door Naruto swung it open and pegged whoever was on the other side of the door. He hit a guy who looked vaguely like Sasuke, only older who seemed to be stuck in a daze. When his head hit the floor he woke up with a passive, yet aggressive glare imprinted on his face. He turned to his friend with the fishy face. "Do what ever you want just leave him living Kisame" said the Strange eyed man.

"Gladly Itachi" said Kisame as he raised his blade only to get hit with a golf club.

"So you two are Itachi and Kisame aren't you two supposed to be S-ranked criminals? I mean come on your being beaten around by a kid with a golf club" said Naruto as he rested the club on his shoulder.

"Well then you wouldn't mind me doing this then would you" Kisame said as he swung his sword snapping the golf club in half " Now stand still so I can lob some limbs off"

"ITACHI" Shouted a shrill girlish voice from down the hall.

The two men wearing red cloud cloaks looked down the hall to see Sasuke charging down the hall his fist ablaze with lightning trailing behind him. He went for the stab on only to be caught by Itachi and thrown into a wall with a broken wrist. "Kisame lets go we've wasted to much time"

"What, we've wasted to much time?" Kisame said as he poised the blade to chop off Naruto's legs.

"I'm guessing that the lady who seduced Ero-sennin was hypnotized by you and that it would only last so long, which you didn't mind since you assumed that I would be easy to capture, unfortunately it took you to long to find my room, then when you were time pressed this happens, and now you don't have time to get away or do it anonymously since Sasuke showed up, who for some reason you just can't kill, did I get it" Naruto said from his position on the floor as he pushed Kisame's sword to the side.

"On the nail" Itachi said as he walked down the hall "Come on Kisame we don't have the time"

"Can't we just kill them it's not like the leader would be mad at us" Kisame said as he moved brought down his sword intent on chopping up Naruto, only for him to hit a toad.

"We wasted to much time come on Kisame" Itachi said as he saw Jiraya approach from the other end of the hall. They tried to move down an adjacent hall and break through a window but the walls suddenly became like a giant intestine, or other organ. Itachi Was desperate to get out of the building, he had used to much Chakra on that failed Tsukyomi which he was intending to use to knock out Naruto so they could get away with little trouble. However, now that Jiraya showed up he couldn't risk fighting. Kisame could probally get away with his life, but he definitely wouldn't, right now he was a sitting duck as he was currently still split between reality and the world of Tsukyomi, which greatly inhibited his ability to decipher what was real and what was not. Jiraya threw a kunai at Itachi hoping to distract him long enough to get Naruto further from the fish freak.

Itachi ran down the hall with Kisame following, there wasn't anyway out of the hall so they had to make one. Itachi used a black flame technique burning a whole through the wall. Their exit left a wall missing and the surrounding walls on fire. Before they could go any further Jiraya pulled out a scroll and slammed it to the ground the fire began to fall from the walls like old wallpaper and was swept up in a pull towards the parchment in Jiraya's hand. "Hmmmmm….This fire" Jiraya mumbled .

"What is it Ero-sennin?" Naruto asked as he walked up behind him to see the scroll.

"It's nothing we have to get going" Jiraya said as he rolled up the scroll and headed to the room.

"But what about Sasuke" Naruto said as Jiraya lifted up his pack and walked out the room.

"Leave the little fag, he'll come to eventually" Jiraya said as he ran out the whole in the wall Itachi made.

"Yeah your probably right" Naruto said as he grabbed his things and stuffed them in his bag before following Jiraya.

Miato Gai, who had been trying to find Jiraya saw the two figures leap out of the gaping hole in the wall just as he was about to enter the hotel. When he got up there he saw another two ninja leap by leap out as well. Looking inside all he saw was a crumpled messed of Sasuke Uchiha. "What the Youthful Fuck is going on here" Gai said as he picked up Sasuke and ran towards Kohona .

**BREAK**

Days later Jiraya and Naruto approached a crushed castle like ruins in the middle of the city they had just entered. "We're close" Jiraya said.

"No dip, look at this mess, she must have been pissed" Naruto said as he began looking around for a local bar.

Jiraya however stopped him by grabbing his shoulder " I bet I know where she is, and remember be subtle" Jiraya said as he lead him to this little restaurant. Walking in Naruto couldn't see anyone that resembled the picture Jiraya had given him earlier. Fortunately Jiraya Spotted her "HEY CHESTY MCBOOBS RACK"

Suddenly everyone in the bar looked toward them and stared as if they were crazy, except for two groups. One was Tsunade's "Aw god damit" She said as she slammed her head intot he table.

Then at the bar two dark skinned men looked on with a smirk, revealing that one of them had razor sharp teeth. "Found him sensei, num num" said the younger one.

**END Part 2**

**Sorry for the long wait but writing this part has always been brutal when I attempt writing it, and yes I could not resist the salute to the Naruto abridged series, it just fit.**

**The secret will be revealed next chapter**

**The street fight will happen still as will as the Kabuto vs Naruto battle**

**And the identity of the two dark skinned men in the bar will be revealed**

**BTW. Num Num is a traditional Zande war cry, which the character who said it will be based on, he also carries zande weapons, look up deadliest warrior to find out more about them.**


	13. The token black kid

**C`hapter 13 :slug searching part 3: The Token black kid**

Naruto and Jiraya sat in the seats directly across from Tsunade and Shizune as they discussed the new proposition of being Hokage over a game of cards. Tsunade just sat there glaring at Jiraya who had a fair sum of money, most of which he had won from Tsunade herself. Meanwhile Shizune and naruto were talking amongst themselves, mostly about how childish the two Legendary ninja could act. Tsunade had proved herself to be a formidable Gambler but after hitting a peak , the money she had won seemed to be slowly dwindling. As Naruto thought she was only called the legendary sucker because if you suckered her into playing long enough you would eventually win all your money back. It seemed as if Tsunade had never heard the saying quite while your ahead, and it was something many took advantage of, including Naruto , who knew his way around a poker game.

"So let me get this straight …you want ME to become the hokage" said Tsunade.

"They probably would choose me, but I'm to busy with Kin and my gang" Naruto said as he folded a hand letting Tsunade win the pot.

Tsunade just glared at the boy who sat across the table "Kid what makes you think that the council would even recommend backing you for hokage, from what I've heard during this little game you passed as the deadlast of your class and even then you only inked by" She said with a smug grin as she pushed all her money onto the table.

"Well I've gotten a whole lot better, I've developed my own fighting style, and I've got an impressive little ace up my sleeve" Naruto said as he went all in as well.

"Impressive resume for a genin, but it takes a lot more then being a good ninja you also need to be a good politician and have years of field experience" Tsunade said as she revealed her cards, two queens and a king with a queen on the table.

"Well I know a good bit of politics I learned from the old man so all I need too do is play the waiting game" Naruto said as turned over his cards to reveal all aces and a king.

"Pfft…only an idoit would WANT that position" tsunade said as Naruto began to rake in his winnings.

"what was that" Naruto said his arms frozen in there bent postion as they raked in the chips.

"I said only an IDOIT would want to be hokage" Tsunade said.

Naruto pulled in the last of his chips, his eye brows twitching "You think that the Hokage's were idiot's" he said as he stood up indignation "The hokage's were brilliant people and they will continue to be so, because not just any one is given that positon, no it's a position of respect, one gained through self sacrifice, each and everyone of those men dies in the line of duty, the third even made it out of office alive, but he took the office back after the fourth died and he held that positon till he died in battle, those idiots as you call them are my idols, people I plan to surpass in everyway ,and I will not tolerate some vain and wrinkled old bat who can't leave her little pity fest to help her own people" Naruto said as her hacked a lugi in her direction that landed in her drink .

Tsunade just stared at her now soiled drink as her rage built up powered by her inebriated state. She watched glaring as the blonde boy walked out of the bar while Jiraya told him that they would meet up at the hotel. Tsunade waited until Jiraya turned around before she went storming out of the bar, which lead Shizune to follow, something that Jiraya didn't overlook and went to investigate. As he stepped outside all he saw was an angry tsunade throwing a fist at the back of Naruto.

Naruto however was blissfully unaware of the impending doom that was following him. All he was going to do was to go out and find a women to seduce and get a one night stand out of. He would have normally gone straight to kin as he had grown addicted to her wild positions and flexible body that he was sure that no other woman had, at least to the extent Kin had cultivated her talent. As he walked away from the bar he noticed that the dirt and dust of the road seemed to be jumping as if someone was stomping angrily. The he spotted another shadow behind his own ,casted by the light of the bar, that was rapidly approaching. The shadow reared it's fist back and Naruto heard the sound of grinding teeth. On instinct he ducked to the left dodging the fist by mere milimeters. Such force was put behind the punch a burst of air flowed from it and destroyed a nearby fruit stand. "LADY TSUNDAE" yelled an irate Shizune, she was tired of her mistresses reckless anger and wasn't going to let her get away without an ear full even if it did nothing to change her, after all lady tsunade was an older woman, one that was most likely set in her ways.

"stay out of this Shizune he spat in my drink" Tsunade shouted making shizune and Jiraya sweat drop, as this whole argument was started over a single drink.

"You're a real bitch you know that" Naruto said as he took the next punch that sent him flying straight into the rubble of the fruit stand..

Tsunade stood triumphantly as the pride of beating a person who would still be called a minor in some countries. However, her triumphant fire was dowsed by the rain of realization. Naruto had climbed out of the pile while she had her head turned to the sky, so while in her inebriated state She barely managed to notice Naruto as he swung a left hook. She dodged and naruto went sailing over her shoulder, but not without slamming his knee into her face. Tsunade grabbed him and flung him to the ground before kicking him away. Naruto stood up and rushed Tsunade again as he began to charge up his rasengan. First he formed a series of ring of chakra, then he used his other hand to fan out the rings into a sphere as he pumped more power into the technique while he used his other hand to attempt to stabilize the attack. As he rushed to hit tsunade he released the hand that was stabilizing, the shell that kept it stable fell apart leaving the technique a super powered punch to the stomach. Tsunade caught the spiraling punch with one hand before lowering her other hand to flick Naruto away in a simple movement. "Jiraya " Shouted the irate Tsunade ass he held her stomach from the powerful blow "are you teaching this kid what I think your teaching him?".

"That and the rasengan" Jiraya answered proudly prompting a suspicious stare from tsunade.

"Okay…. I meant the rasengan in the first place, what are you teaching this kid?" she asked with a threatening glare.

"What else would a pervert like me teach an adolesent boy, who will more then likely have multitudes of women chasing him," Jiraya said as he reached into his jacket.

"You perverted old man" Tsunade shouted as she swiped at him only to stop when she saw a small pink book in his hands, which she immediately took and started jumping around like a little school girl as she waved it in Shizune's face.

"Care to explain?" Naruto asked rhetorically, as it was more of a demand then a question .

" Well when I first released Icha Icha Paradise I anticipated that most women including Tsunade would hunt me down and rip my flesh from my bones, as angry women are known to do" Jiraya said as he pulled another copy of the same book from his jacket " so I also wrote Icha Icha pure romance to keep the woman off my back by making them believe that I write to target audience with each book, or in tsunade's case keep them distracted long enough for them to forget why their angry" He finished as he tossed the second book to Shizune.

"do all your books started with the title Icha Icha?" Naruto asked with a look that just seemed deadpanned.

"Yes, it's like a signature now, you know, so when ever people see it they know who wrote it, plus I make millions from all over the five nations when I use the franchise title" Jiraya said.

"This answers so much and leaves so many questions" Naruto said as he shook his head as he reached for his wallet, making sure that he didn't loose it in his food cart crash "Hey were is my wallet" he said as he looked over the impromptu battle field.

"You mean this wallet" Tsunade said as she left her excited stupor to wave Naruto's frog wallet in front of his face " why do you have such a childish wallet" she said as she pocketed the money frog.

"Well I was gonna get a new one but kin said she'd make me a special one herself" naruto said as he pictured what the wallet may look like "Can you give me my money back" anruto said deadpanned as he watched Tsunade try and sneak off.

"I'll do you one better" a shifty tsunade said as she turned around "if you can master that new jutsu of yours in a week you win, if not you loose, Deal?" She said as she swivled around waiting for an escape.

"I'll do it in three days, no more no less, and if I win you become hokage" Naruto said angering Tsunade.

"FINE, if I WIN THEN YOU GVE UP YOUR DREAM OF BECOMING HOKAGE" She shouted.

"FINE" Naruto fired back before he stomped off into the woods.

This left a confused Jiraya and Shizune standing in a dusty old road next to a broken food cart. Shizune turned toward the Hotel where her master had stomped off to and moved towards it only to be stopped by a hand on her shoulder. It was Jiraya, and for the first time out of the many she had seen him, during her and Tsunade's travels, her wore a serious look and not the goofy grin she was accustomed to and honestly it scared her. " I'll go talk with Tsunade and see if I can get her to go easier on the boy, it will seem less insulting if I do it rather than her apprentice" Jiraya said as Shizune nodded her head, after all it would be a great insult to any master if their pupil questioned them. "Meanwhile, you'll go and keep an eye on Naruto, make sure he doesn't kill himself or get lost, and watch yourself too, he has a way with the ladies" Jiraya said as she walked off into the woods.

Shizune laughed "Ha whats the guy gonna do ,convince me to sleep with him?"

-**A FEW HOURS LATER-**

"Oh My God" Shizune stated with a shocked look spread out over her red face "I can't believe you managed to do that" she said as she laid down on the sheets of the tent floor, a light coat of sweat making her body glisten in the flashlight's light.

"Yeah, your not the first to say that" Naruto said as he held the flashlight up to the copy of Icha Icha paradise he was reading.

"Why are you reading that, we just had sex isn't that enough" Shizune asked with a look of disgust.

"Yeah it is, but Jiraya said something odd about the series that I'm trying to figure out" Naruto answered as he continued.

"Which is?" Shizune asked impatiently.

"I forgot what It was about five pages in"

**-EARLIER-**

Shizune arrived in a clearing, having followed a trail of broken trees and drops of blood as well as any other obscure tool used by trackers. She saw many craters already covered the once clean grassy field that her and her mistress had passed through on the way to town, otfuku gai she thought. She had been so many places in her life she really didn't care anymore about which town they were in. Any way she noticed Naruto laying against a tree with his hands behind his back. He noticed her as she approached "What do you want?" He asked in a tone that tore shizune between thinking he was rude, and thinking he was a caring person.

"Jiraya told me to watch over you while you practice, to make sure you don't kill yourself" She said as she sat next to him smiling.

"yeah well you're a little late for that" He said pointing to a shredded body with various pieces of stone jutting out from the flesh "Tried hitting a boulder with rasengan, the damn thing blew up and nearly took my head off, instead it decided to take everything else"

Shizune began doing a double take between the body and Naruto confused about what was going on. Naruto looked at her and chuckled "it's a little trick of mine, I'm not even sure how it works but it's saved my butt more times then I'd like" He explained as she continued to stare at the body.

"But…but…but" shizune began Stuttering as she began frantically going back and forth between the two Naruto bodies, before the one filled with rocks began to dissipate in a glowing blue hue.

"That's new" naruto said as he got up to poke the now empty space the body once occupied.

Shizune just stared at the strange boy. She didn't know what to say, hell she barely had a grasp on what was going on. It also didn't help that this boy acted like nothing was wrong with being dead in one place and living in another with the other body suddenly disappearing. "Geez calm down, Listen I need you to watch me and see if you can tell me what I'm doing wrong" Naruto explained as he saw her panic.

"But I don't even know the basics of the rasengan" Shizune begged as naruto performed the rasengan again and slammed it into a tree.

As he slammed it into the tree he suddenly released it, his arm flying back. His arm dragged him as his back slid across the slick grass. Naruto managed to Pull himself up to his feet before his hand began to burn and sting. Naruto began shaking his hand while cursing. Shizune immediately ran over to his side and grabbed his hand and checked the palm. Shizune was shocked by what she saw. It was obviously chakra burn caused by improper use of the technique, which most likely was caused when naruto fanned out the chakra disk to make the sphere. Shizune reached into her waist pack and pulled out a smal jar filled with a specialized burn cream and began to spread it over his palm before wrapping it. " Well you won't be practicing anymore tonight" Shizune said as she looked up at the slowly dimming sky "It's getting late".

"Yeah…. The sun sets beautiful isn't it" Naruto said As he turned toward Shizune "Thanks for the help" Naruto finished as he smiled.

" Uh…Your welcome" She whispered embarrassed "Not many people, thank me for healing them, no one infact, not even lady Tsunade when I help her with a hangover" her voice sad and depressed " I guess it comes with being a doctor, afteralll it is my job to help get better or to relieve their pain, but sometimes I think people take me for granted or that I'm being used" She finished as she rubbed her arm.

"Well I think that it's a shame that such a beautiful woman is unappreciated" Naruto said as he brushed a strand of hair from her face.

" Oh stop your just trying to seduce me" Shizune said trying to look angry despite her blush.

"well then that makes things easier" Naruto said as he stood up and reached into his traveling pack to pull out a tent.

"How?" Shizune asked as she got up to help assemble the tent.

"Simple, because now you know where you'll end up" Naruto said with a sly smirk as he managed to get the tent to stay up before he threw the tarp over.

" And what makes you think I'll sleep with you" Shizune said a she pulled out a sleeping mat and blankets "what's with the blankets?" Shizune asked, as he didn't have a sleeping bag or anything like it just blankets.

"It's easier to get in and out of blankets and a sleeping mat then a sleeping bag, sure it may add a little buclk to my pack, but if there's a midnight ambush then I'm ready to fight in seconds" Naruto explained as he spread the sheets out over the mat and went inside with Shizune following.

He laid down on the sheets looking at the ceiling of the tent before grabbing a lantern from his pack and hanging it. The new light source casted odd shadows around the tent, making Shizune giggle when she spotted Naruto's shadow puppets. " So I guess your stayin with me tonight huh?" Naruto asked as he continued his little game.

"Yeah Lady Tsunade is always unruly when she gets that drunk, and Jiraya…" Shizune trailed off the obvious needing not to be said.

"Well, it will be nice to have a gorgeous woman spend the night with me" Naruto said making Shizune blush a light red.

"you think I'm gorgeous?" She asked as she held her hands to her chest.

"I know you are" Naruto said as he kissed her on the cheek.

She blushed a deeper red, something Naruto took note of. " Why are you so nervous when I touch you like that? Is it because no one's done it before?' he asked suspicious of Shizune's reactions.

"well plenty of men have tried too sweet talk me and such but every time it seemed like they would make the next move Tsunade had to run from debt collectors" Shizune said as she felt Naruto's arms wrap around her waist.

"So you've never been with another person before?" Naruto asked as he began to perform a small chakra trick he picked up from listening to Jiraya.

Chakra was apparently very specific about the person it came from, Solider pills had to be purified of almost everything in the chakra they were made with before even being produced. If they weren't then whenever someone used them they would be kill by their chakra which would basically attack the stomach to destroy the foreign chakra. However, in close quarters controlled amounts of chakra could give the user control of the opponents body, allowing them to make their movements more sluggish and an easier target, or to prevent the flow of chakra like the hyuuga's gentle fist. In this case Naruto was using his chakra to make Shizune's libido sky rocket, from there it would be a simple game of getting her under the sheets. So with a simple twitch of an eyebrow, which was unnecessary as a simple thought would have sufficed, Naruto began to slowly inch Shizune's libido up higher and higher being very carefully to not make it rise too fast or Shizune may suspect something.

**Lemon Alert**

When Naruto finally got her libido up to the point where he could feel her body heating up he made his move. "Whoa It's getting hot it must be the humidity" Naruto said as he removed his dull orange hooded jacket and sleeveless, black under shirt.

"Yeah your right" Shizune said as she loosened her robes.

"You look a little tense" Naruto said as he reached her hands into Shizune's loose robes and rubbed her shoulders slipping off the straps on her bra.

Shizune began to moan softly as Naruto's hands began pulling her top robes her down her shoulders. She grabbed his hands to stop him. "No, stop I'm feeling uncomfortable" She said , practically begging for him to stop for fear of loosing control of her body.

"Well then make yourself comfortable" Naruto whispered into her ear with a husky voice his breathe sending shivers down Shizune's spin. He tugged her robes down further letting them drop to the floor of the small tent. Naruto then let his pants fall to the floor as well leaving both of them in nothing but their underwear. Naruto let his hands wander Shizune's body, which she let have free roam over her body which was getting warmer and warmer. Naruto grabbed one of her breasts and fondled them lightly, making Shizune moan in excitement as he slid his other hand into her panties and her wet folds pumping his fingers while he whispered into her ear "Say my name, Shizune, say it"

"N-N-Na-Naru-Naruto" Shizune barely managed to stutter out with a gasp as she felt his arousal begin to poke her back side. Her hands, which were busy trying to wrap themselves around Naruto, ventured towards the waist of her panties. With a single light tug they fell enough that they were freed from the surface of her body. She felt Naruto unclasp her bra and gently guide it off and down her arms as her breathe grew heavy. She turned to face him gaining the first real glimpse she could get at Naruto's member in it's full glory. Shizune gasped, for someone his age he seemed well endowed. She watched him remove the garment that blocked her way to heaven before she leaned into him and kissed him hard on the lips, slipping a little tongue in.

Naruto then grabbed her around the waist again and began to massage her back as she began to rub against him in their heated make out session. Shizune moaned into the kiss, her eyes snapping open at the sudden waves of pleasure that were being sent through her body. An immense pressure inside Shizune burst out, increasing the pleasure she felt ten fold. She just had an orgasm, making Naruto smirk as he had yet to even enter her and she was already cumming for him. He positioned himself to enter as Shizune began to pant in her overly aroused state. She needed him in her that moment and she wasn't afraid to tell him "Just go, Stick it in me, I can't take it anymore" She begged.

Naruto wordlessly answered by plunging in making Shizune's spine arc. He hit a barrier and pressed on breaking it. Shizune felt a wave of pain briefly pass through her, but it was still sore at the source. She told Naruto to go slow, and he did rocking back and forth in a controlled pace. Shizune moaned as she felt Naruto rub against her inner walls. As the pain subsided The pleasure began to increase exponentially, as did Naruto's speed. It wasn't long before he was ramming into her with all he had.

After about an hour of various positions and Shizune riding out a wave of orgasms into a near euphoric state, Naruto began to feel himself begin to tense up. It became harder to move in a controlled manner, and his legs felt weak like all his energy was being directed to one organ. He felt Shizune cum again tightening around his member moaning. His motioned continued and with the tightened walls Naruto couldn't hold it anymore and exploded into Shizune. Shizune cried out in pleasure as she felt his seed penetrate her womb and fill her with a warm brew. "So is there anything else we can try?" Shizune asked in her sex crazed state, leading to the situation stated earlier in about two more hours.

**Lemon end**

The next morning brought new opportunities for Naruto's training, as with the inclusion of some more chakra control training that Shizune had recommended and some practice with the balloons to tune up his ability to multi task. It was simple really, the most basic principle of Rasengan is the ability to multitask, as it's composition is mostly formation, empowering, and stabilizing. The key to creating a perfect Rasengan is to pull of all the steps almost simultaneously, allowing them to form with each other and to remain stable. So if Naruto could master the needle stand technique while perfecting the Rasengan's outer shell then it would be a simple matter of combining all of the aspects of the Rasengan in battle. Though while Naruto was out practicing Shizune had to go see Jiraya about something. However the moment Jiraya saw her he began giggling, Shizune just glared at him "I told you to be careful" Jiraya said as he laughed heartily while pulling out his notebook to write down somethings about Shizune's current appearance. Shizune looked exhausted like she didn't get much sleep or any at all, her clothes were wrinkled and dusty from being thrown to the ground haphazardly, and her face was stuck with a heavy blush while the smell of sex was adhered to her clothing and heavily wafted in the air as evidence to the dirty deed.

Shizune just glared at him "Shut up, I need to ask some questions about Naruto"

Jiraya looked up from his notebook and stowed it away in one of his Jackets pockets which seem to hold almost anything he would ever need "Ask away"

"When I got to the field Naruto was practicing in I saw a body that was torn apart by rubble that Naruto claimed was his own" Shizune explained "Could you tell me what's going on with him ?" she asked in an annoyed tone.

Jiraya was silent for what seemed like a minute with his hands to his chin as if her was thinking. "Its called the false death technique" The words seemed to break a necessary silence.

" I thought it was just a myth, I mean Tsunade has mentioned that she tried to recreate it but she said she found it to be impossible" Shizune said disbelievingly.

"Its real, and only Naruto can use it" Jiraya said "It only appears in a select few beings, Naruto being the first Jinchuriki to be the son of a previous container and to be one himself ,both holding the same demon ,has obtained enough chakra power to convert himself into pure chakra and allowing him escape a dying Physical body and create a new one to inhabit out of pure energy, the experience leaves him exhausted but his adrenaline begins kicking in giving him enhanced abilities for a short while, the more painful the death the stronger the boost, the ability is always active and can only handle about one death a day IF Naruto is lucky" Jiraya paused "Then there is near death, Naruto's body begins to repair rapidly as his adrenaline rush boost his power, He also enters a state of anger which is projected through his chakra as a giant armored demon of a warrior, this is called the shield of death and is the result of Naruto's chakra trying to tear his mind and soul from a living body. It acts like an extension of himself and gives him a more powerful and greater reach" He explained with a strange calmness.

"Does he know this" Shizune asked.

"No, not yet" Jiraya said "I've yet to find a way to break it to him that he has dragged tot the surface a possible bloodline, I don't want it going to his head"

"Or through it" Shizune joked as she left Jiraya to go get a change of clothes from the hotel.

**WITH NARUTO**

Naruto had been up training nonstop for what seemed like hours, balancing on a bed of needles while attempting to finish the Rasengan. Now, while it seemed that every time he did form the Rasengan it became easier and seemed simpler to him, however, progress was coming along slow. The training was beginning to get monotonous, so Naruto decided to get creative. He decided to take a small break and attempt to rig a weapon into his shoes, which was a tricky thing to do. Luckily Naruto was the only person who passed traps and rigging in his class and always carried some of the common tools for rigging. Taking out a spare pair of shoes he managed to install a small bed of senbons on the bottom of each boot. Naruto tried them out pulling some kicks and swipes while activating the spikes. The shoes were now a weapon themselves having a bed of senbons tips added and two long spines in the front and back to add lethality to a sweeping kick. While the shoes were not as comfortable as he would like them to be they didn't hurt his feet or make it too uncomfortable to walk, but he could feel the metal imbedded in the soles of shoe which irritated him, but he was sure that if he asked Tenten should could compact the equipment in the shoe, after all Tenten was twice as skilled as he was with rigging weapons.

When Naruto finished building his new shoes it was around noon, and that's when Shizune walked into the field where he was now practicing his Shuriken style Ninjutsu. Shizune stood amazed and robbed of her voice at the many versatile moves and on the spot thinking that the ninjutsu relied upon. It was truly an unpredictable style of ninjutsu as it lacked elemental, allowing space for elemental type attacks, and its powerful moves turned a single person into a tank that could blast tunnels into cliffsides and while she didn't see the more powerful ones in action she did see Naruto putting together the "prep scrolls" he called them for his more powerful jutsu. It seemed like he always kept at least ten of the palm sized scrolls secured to a belt that was hidden under his dull orange jacket. "Naruto this is amazing" Shizune said in amazement .

Shadows began to run through the backround dashing between trees hiding. Naruto looked in the direction they were moving through, he saw nothing and assumed it was some local animals. He turned back towards Shizune "Well it's nothing really, I mean of the hundered of variations that are available to the Kunai it wasn't it much of a stretch to apply the same principal to the shuriken, then with the Shuriken style ninjutsu I created, well it was pretty much using the design of Shuriken's fan like design to generate energy for most attacks" He explained.

"That's it" She said questioningly.

"That's it" Naruto stated as he finished up his scroll preperation "Now lets get back to Practice" he finished as he put his scroll belt on and carefully stepped back on to the bed of needles before attempting a Rasengan.

**Two Days Later**

Naruto knew that a whole lot of shit was going to happen when he meet Tsunade, but he never suspected being dragged to a small little get together, a fake apology for insulting his heroes, being poisoned unsuspectingly, Shizune initiating another romp through the grass, waking up tied to a bed, getting loose and tracking Tsunade, Finding out that she was being bribed by Orochimaru to fix his severed arm and fingers, then learning that you were poisioned and a huge epic battle breaking out, Yep this was one of the most fucked up things that's happened to him recently.

Orochimaru stood across the field with two of his lackeys, Kabuto and some nameless albino with red dots on his forehead. The snake freaks tongue swayed back and forth tauntingly as the Naruto, Shizune, Jiraya and Tsunade all glared at him. "Are you really going to go against me Tsunade, I killed Sarutobi a man revered as the god of shin obi, what hope do you have of beating me" he said with his freakish girly laugh.

"Dude you fucking did not kill The old man, he died of a heart attack brought on by his habitual smoking not a battle" Naruto shouted making Tsunade reel back.

Orochimaru glared at him and motioned for Kabuto to attack. Kabuto leaped forward with a kunai in hand and engaged in a fight with Naruto who was being pushed back. Orochimaru saw that his right hand was having some difficulties, a testament to the growing annoyance of the armed boy. A blade emerged from his mouth and as he began a mad charge for Naruto and Kabuto's battle. Jiraya dashed forward intent on stoping the snake freak, However, a pan blocked his and Orochimaru's paths. Holding the pan was a large black man with a beard. He had very powerful arms and was dressed like a chef "Well now you Pale Creepy ass Nambla wannabe , there's no need to go attackin the children ya hear" said the big black man.

"Who are you?" Orochimaru asked his blade trying to break the pan.

"You can call me Chef"

**Naruto vs. Kabuto**

With each punch that was swung, with each kick delivered, with each slash of a kunai, Naruto had taken a step back. Kabuto had the advantage, he was stronger, experienced, more skilled, better equipped and was using this against Naruto. The only thing that saved Naruto was instincts developed from his childhood, years of dodging kunai and shuriken thrown by chunin and johnin who had claimed they we're helping him train, the only thing that saved him then was the "training" he had received from the last wannabe demon slayer. Naruto was dodging the blades by mere inches, then centimeters, then millimeters. It was getting to easy for Kabuto to manipulate his movement with his attacks moving him into a vulnerable position. Kabuto swung a punch, Naruto ducked under only to get a knee to the face making him reel back. Blood flowed from his nose, it was most likely broken. Naruto grabbed his crooked bleeding nose and snapped it back into its place, however he lost his focus on the battle letting Kabuto attack with a kunai to the throat. Naruto knocked it away but ended up getting roundhoused and elbowed in the head. Kabuto tried to get Naruto again, this time Naruto was disorientated from the force of the kick. All seemed lost for Naruto until a large strange thing came flying from the left and knocked Kabuto's Kunai right out of his hand. Kabuto just looked at the very strange, throwing knife 'What the hell is that thing, more importantly were did it come from' pondered Kabuto as he drew another Kunai and looked toward the origin of the thrown knife. He saw a tall black teen who wore a only simple pair of baggy brown pants and some strapped sandal. A large spear rested on his back with a quiver and a sheild, the boy also had a bow in his hand with an arrow notched "Nyam nyam" was all he said before he released the arrow which lodged itself in Kabuto's shoulder.

"shit" Kabuto swore out as he attempted to pull out the arrow only for another to break of the arrows shaft leaving only a splintered stick and arrowhead stuck there. Kabuto then remembered Naruto and turned back to face him just in time to get a Rasengan to the stomach. He was launched a few feet across the field but hit a large rock. He tried to stand up disorientated but tripped when the ground shook from a violent summoning. He knew it was Orochimaru, as Kabuto knew he always had a trick up his sleeve for summoning his snakes. Kabuto then looked at the wound he had just received, it looked bad, like the attack had exploded on contact after drilling into his stomach. He began healing the wound, but it was slow going. He looked across the field to see Naruto looking on in shock, as most people did when they say his body just steam up and repair itself, he looked toward the hill where he saw the black child, who was now gone, then he looked toward the slug sannin who was now on her knees convulsing over the large quantities of blood while her apprentice was trying to snap her out of it. Kabuto smirked as he stepped forward but stopped when he felt something tear into his side, it was the boy with the spear.

Naruto, meanwhile smirked when he saw the spear enter Kabuto side, right between the ribs. "Hey kid" He shouted out" the hooked edges, spin the spear and use them to grip the ribs" . The kid smirked and did as he was told, he gave the spear a hard tug dragging Kabuto with it. Kabuto then brought his hand down to break the spear only to be hit by that Rasengan attack again. He flew back to Orochimaru's side half of his side missing and bleeding profusely. Orochimaru himself had take quite a beating as well, he looked over at Kabuto. He then looked over at Naruto who was holding his chest from the attack Kabuto managed to sneak in and the bloodloss

'that damn brat is a thorn in my side, this ends now' Orochimaru thought as he rushed forward only to be punched by Tsunade. "Tsunade your protecting these people ,Why?"

"Because I am the Fifth Hokage" She said with a gallant breeze blowing her ponytail into a violent stream of hair.

**Skip epic fight scene**

"So who are you" Naruto asked from his bed, as Tsunade had forbidden him from leaving the room from as long as she was healing him and he had nothing better to do.

" I am Token, I was raised in dimbala to be a warrior for the Zande tribe, then I meet Chef who offered me a chance to travel the world and learn new forms of combat" Token said " After awhile we both had this vison of a different live, so we steeled our resolve to find these people, you being one of them"

"Yeah I kind of knew that" Naruto said as he sat up on the bed "Me, Stan, Kyle, Butters, Wendy and Eric are all gathering the old gang in Konoha"

"Well I think Me and Chef are joining your little group" Token said with a powerful enthusiasm.

"Never thought you wouldn't" Naruto said as he looked at the peculiar green gem now hanging from his neck ' When did I get this thing' he thought.

**END Slug searchin saga**

**Yeah I know it was rushed, I was up late trying to finish this one all for you guys….after forgetting about this for a few weeks **


	14. Amazon intro

**Chapter 14: THE AMAZONS part 1**

It had been about a week since Naruto had returned from his trip with Jiraya and he wasn't doing so well. He was having a lot of money issues, as his friends were mooches; here in Konoha they had no real jobs so they were dependant on him for money. He had no real problems with it as he had won a butt load of cash in the badlands, but he knew it couldn't continue. Kyle was still looking for a place to open a blacksmith shop; Chef was now looking for a place to open up a restaurant and butters was trying to get the embassy, he had promised his father he would build, approved. Naruto knew he couldn't abandon his friends, even if one turned out to be pip, they were coming together as a group it was blatantly obvious.

The matter confused Naruto greatly, he knew that if he did nothing that in about two months the prize money would run out. So he needed to get his friends a job that was the obvious solution. However, his friends were oddities and violent for that matter, so who in their right mind would hire them. They certainly couldn't become ninja's, as they didn't have the training, but they might be able to join the civilian militia. Scratch that the militia was a volunteer service and didn't pay the volunteers, that and they needed proper I.D. which they didn't have.

Naruto decided that things would be best if he just took a walk and thought everything out. Besides he needed to go find the dealer that managed the betting booth at the chunin exams. As Naruto wandered the streets of Konoha he thought of the fate of his friends. They all loved it here, the food, the shopping the people and the hangouts it was a paradise to them. Well most of them, Cartman had a problem of being called a fat ass while Wendy was constantly being hit on, much to the annoyance of Stan. But other than those few problems the city life was perfect for them. However their fighters by heart and would not take a break for long, well at least that's what he told himself.

Naruto walked for what seemed like hours, wandering the streets aimlessly before he arrived back at his building. As he came through the streets he noticed for the first time in his life, that the surrounding buildings from across the street of his apartment building were abandoned. As he continued down the path he noticed that vendors had a line of carts blocking the main ways out of the small square. It was normal that he didn't notice this as he had a habit of using the alleyways to sneak from place to place. The whole area just seemed out of place. It was obvious people were trying to avoid him, and boy were they trying. Lots of people were left homeless during the invasion, and yet these perfectly unharmed buildings weren't being used by anyone at all. Naruto figured it was because it was dangerous to live around him, as his building would frequently catch fire when he was younger, most were probably more afraid of the buildings blowing then him. The shear vastness of all the empty space made Naruto realize that the properties would be extremely cheap, he could buy them and give the space to his friends for their smiths, restaurants, and dojo's. However, it wasn't a very bright thing to do as the buildings were given a bad reputation among the village and as such may be avoided. Maybe if they all collaborated into one large organization, but what would need a restaurant, dojo and smith as facilities, whatever it was he certainly didn't know. Even if he did they still didn't have the resources to make it happen. He needed to get out of the village for a while, clear his head, maybe then he could solve his problem.

He walked over to the hokage tower and towards the mission distribution office, where he was going to take the mission that got him out of the village for more then a day. He saw the lady handing out b-rank missions turning away some ninja away claiming that they were need in construction. He knew this would be hard, or easy, it all depended on the cards he played. "Hey lady, can I get a mission that will take me out of the village for about a week?"

"Are you on duty" She asked shuffling through the scrolls looking for a mission.

Naruto didn't know what to say, this was actually the first time he had been asked that. Of course he knew that On-duty Ninja were first priority and got the best missions compared to the ones off-duty ninjas, but the work cycles made sure nobody was inactive for too long. Naruto briefly wondered If On-duty Ninja skipped days for training, before throwing the thought aside. Afterall some days the office of Mission distribution , or the OMD, had no missions to give out, but that didn't mean some ninja's weren't working. "I don't know haven't checked in awhile" Naruto said.

The lady hummfed "fine, Name please"

"Naruto Uzumaki"

"Lets see Naruto Uzumaki" the lady said as she flipped through various files and folders before pulling out one with his name on it " Hmmm… you've been transferred to the Hokage's direct counciling, meaning you get all your missions directly from her, lucky you"

Naruto sighed, turning around he headed for the stairs. Being a ninja under the hokages direct council was great in all, but it meant that you were always On-duty, you could be called at any time to go on a mission. However, on the plus side it meant better pay and better benefits. Looking at the door to the hokage's office he stormed in through the first door, said hello and made out with Shizune, opened the second door and walked up to Tsunade's desk. He slammed his palms into the table, shaking it and waking Tsunade. "what is it brat" she said as she hauled herself up off the table.

" I need a mission, just something to get me out of town for a while" Naruto said as he looked over tsunade's desk.

Tsunade grumbled as she went through mission requests looking for one that Naruto would enjoy. It was definitely a perk that a ninja working under the hokage couldn't be refused a mission as long as normal circumstances were employed. She pulled out a scroll that had a stain from a mug on it's back, the most interesting thing was that it had a seal from the land of woman, better known as the amazon country, a small part of land of fire with an exceptionally difficult forest to navigate. The only way in and out was with an amazon guide, who were very picky about their clients. "Your are to report to a small settlement near the border of the Amazons, there you are going to meet a guide who will take you too the village, There you will be briefed, you leave in the morning now get out Im trying to sleep" Tsunade read before handing the scroll over to Naruto.

"Great, see you later granny" Naruto said as he ducked under a punch and walked out of her office.

"SHUT IT YOU BRAT"

**FOUR DAYS LATER**

Naruto sat in an old parlor in this dilapidated settlement. For some reason it was abandoned , which didn't make sense. After all he had been to this settlement only 2 years before when the academy had decided a field trip out of the village was in order. At that time he had learned that the settlement was fairly young and thriving, being only seven years old. The buildings however told a story that was violent in origin. Some of the larger buildings were toppled over and the others were crushed. All that was left standing were a few measly homes and the parlor.

The place was disturbing to say the least, as most of the destruction seemed fresh. Naruto even swore that he could smell the scent of dead bodies amongst the rubble. Whatever had done this was here recently, because it's foot prints were fairly fresh. Naruto had no clue what attacked this settlement of kind people, but he did have a clue to the going ons during the event. According to a journal he found the village was still standing about 3 weeks ago. Naruto did not know who the journal belonged too but he could tell it was a woman's by the hand writing. Whether she was still alive or not he didn't know or care to know, all Naruto wanted right now was to get out of this ramshackled parlor that smelled of death and desperation. It was obvious that people had tried to hide in here, as some bodies were still in there, one person was even alive when he got there, she fell asleep soon afterwards. Who she was, a total mystery, but Naruto always helped a woman in need, and boy was this woman in need. Starvation was slowly killing the woman when he found her, she had apparently twisted her ankle and couldn't walk, making it dangerous to go outside. Naruto had lifted her up onto a table and laid her out. Before setting her down Naruto gave her some food. It made her smile weakly and Naruto cringe, he had a feeling that whatever it was that had done this was what the amazons needed taken care of.


	15. Women and Wasps

**Chapter 15: Amazons part 2 : Peril of scantily clad warrior women and wasps**

Naruto sat in the old parlor were he found the woman. He was told to wait in this village, but he wasn't sure if he should. After all it was no longer a village really, more like a field of rubble. Naruto looked outside and then back at the woman, she wouldn't last too long. She needed medical attention soon, or she would die, or not, Naruto wasn't really a doctor so all he really knew was that this lady needed a real doctor. He searched the woman for any I.D. and found nothing but an old pan flute. Looking at it strangely he gave it a blow. The sound that followed was sweet and echoing. Naruto continued to play random notes punching out a broken song, before playing a smoother song. As he played the woman cracked open her eyes groaning, causing Naruto to stop. She smiled "Your song was beautiful, why did you stop?" She asked a frowning threatening to etch onto her face.

"Well thank you, but I need to ask you a few questions" Naruto said giving his smiling grin.

"will you play your song again if I do?" the woman asked as she tried to sit up.

"Sure, now who are you, and why are you here, and better yet what the hell happened?"

" I'm Sonia, I come from far away, I heard legends of a mystical pan flute that held enormous powers" Sonia said as she sat up " So I come here, I heard of this ancient temple that the Amazons have built their fortress around and I'm sure that this temple holds either the key to the flute or the flute itself" At this point her face seemed strained like she was trying to remember something she didn't want to "Then this thing, this huge brutish hairy thing just ran through the village like a bull destroying anything that made a noise, some tried to hide at the top of town hall's tower, but they foolishly taunted the beast, it tried to get them but the tower fell under its weight, a piece of rubble struck its eye, blinding it and sending it into a stupor and hurt itself even more before running off into the woods, at this point everyone was too afraid of going outside, many died of starvation scared that the slightest sound would draw the beast back, the rest of us ate what we had as silently as we could, then we ran out of food, I managed to hide some food for myself, I ran out only three days later" she said.

"Okay is that everything" Naruto asked.

"yes…can you keep playing your lovely song" Sonia asked her voice filled with hope.

Naruto smiled "Sure" he lifted the flute to his lips and blew, causing the sweet melody to start again.

**Meanwhile**

Izumi had been sent to collect a traveler from the near by village to take him through the Amazon. She was however reluctant to go as the traveler was a man. She hated men, along with most of her sisters in the village. To her all they were good for was being thrown in the population dungeons were their "essence" was "harvested" to make children. So it was only natural that she hated men, especially after what the empress had said they had done to her. Rape and murder, the two things that the empress protested heavily against, saying that they were the crimes of man against her, her family, her sisters….her daughter. These accusations were the basis for their current man hating, which of course always changed. As time changed certain crimes died and as such certain beliefs, but the empress had expressed an always current travesty, one that kept the hate for many years.

Izumi sneered at the destroyed village, it served the men right. She rode right in on her horse which was pulling a cart for the man to ride in, so he wouldn't be able to touch her. She didn't know why the ninja village couldn't have sent a woman, surely they could do a better job then any male could, but their leader insisted that they accept this male into their home.

When she pulled up to one of the only standing buildings she saw something moving through the trees. She immediately leaped up into a standing position, still on the horses back, with a spear in her hands. She looked on into the forest but nothing moved, she stayed frozen looking for any threat for a while before someone's voice shook her from . "hey are you my contact?"

She turned around and sneered, it was a man carrying a woman, a sick woman by the looks of it. She growled threateningly, wondering what this man had done to the woman. " I hope you don't mind if we pick up this straggler here, she's pretty weak and needs medical attention" Said the man. Izumi motioned for him to climb up onto the cart. The man nodded and put the woman on the cart before running back inside to grab something else. He came back with two packs, the more militarist one was definitely the man's as he was the one wearing the headband of the leaf.

As soon as the man climbed aboard he reached into the womans pack and pulled out a pan flute. As he played Izumi felt herself begin to relax, she always did love listening to her mother, or any one really play the pan flute. There was this one song that she really loved though, one that the man happened to be playing. " Where did you learn that song male" She said calmly.

The Man just smiled " My name is Naruto Uzumaki, and I really just punched out the song"

Izumi huffed, immediately loosing her calm attitude. This outsider, this man had just pieced together a supposedly sacred Amazonian song. The nerve of this Naruto Uzumaki to just waltz in and….wait. "You said your name was Uzumaki" Izumi asked.

"Yeah, why?" Naruto said as he kept playing making the injured woman smile.

"No real reason" Izumi said " it can't be possible…could it" she whispered

"what couldn't be possible" Naruto asked.

"Nothing, just leave it be" Izumi shouted as she tugged the reigns, making the horse pulling the cart to go faster.

As they rode through the lively forest Naruto could hear something buzzing about. Shadows dashed around in the shadows watching them. However, he could not see them clearly, all he knew was that what ever was following them could fly. Naruto looked around suspiciously as the buzzing seemed to get louder. He saw that his escort was getting nervous, with one hand she was tightening her hold on the reigns and the other was reaching for her spear. "What's going on?" Naruto asked as he pulled out some shuriken.

"Were passing through hostile area's right now" Said Izumi.

"But I thought the Amazons controlled all of the forest in this area?" Naruto asked confused.

" We do but we're dealing with an infestation problem right now so be alert Male" Izumi snarled, she did not liked being questioned.

The buzzing sounds picked up and grew closer as Izumi lowered her spear and grabbed hold of her sword. Naruto pulled out some ninja wire and held it in the same hand as the shuriken, he was beginning to antsy. The noise then flew at them and hit Izumi, knocking her off the horse. Izumi hit the horse with her leg as she fell, dropping her sword in the process.

The horse snorted and raised it's front hooves before stomping them down and running off. Naruto noticed and grabbed her arm and flung her back up to the cart before the horse could carry him and the sleeping woman off. Izumi growled at him, she had almost retrieved her sword when the man grabbed her elbow, but she was otherwise grateful for keeping her in the group. "Get the horse under control, I'll fight those things" Naruto ordered.

Izumi reluctantly obeyed, she did not have the appropriate weapons for this fight and she was the only one who could get the horse under controlled. As Izumi attempted to calm the horse Naruto got a look at their assailants. They were giant wasps, almost the size of a 10 year- old, with blue coloring and giant stingers. They had a menacing jaw that snapped every few second, releasing an acidic bursts that fell short of Naruto and the group. Naruto tossed the Shuriken and wire in the air "**Shuriken Art : Chain Star Sword".**

They disappeared in a puff of smoke only to be replaced by a large two pronged pole. Between the prongs were3 numerous ninja stars arranged like gears. Naruto began focusing chakra, making the stars spin with a violent whir (**NINJA CHAIN SAW)**.

The Giant wasps dashed forward stingers first, But Naruto knocked them away and sliced them in half. The chain star sword ran through anything it touched like butter and sprayed blood in all direction. The wasps attacked wave after wave, but Naruto sliced through them all with an unnatural ease. Suddenly one wasp was left, Naruto was tired from keeping the blade spinning and swinging. The wasp dashed forward to take Naruto out but Naruto saw it. Naruto moved to punch it in the head, but it dodged back. Suddenly a fist like silhouette appeared next to Naruto's hand striking the wasp. Naruto was confused by what had happened, but accepted the victory non the less. Then more, louder buzzing could be heard. "What's going on I thought I scared off the wasps" Naruto asked as he held the chain sword , slowly turning the blades.

"You angered the queen apparently" Izumi said in a frightened tone as she kept the horse going full speed.

"Wasps have queens?" Naruto asked.

"OH GOD STOP TALKING AND START KILLING , FOR HEAVENS SAKE IF YOU JUST SHUT UP AND KILL THOSE THINGS I WILL SLEEP WITH YOU AT ANYTIME FOR THE DURATION OF YOUR STAY" Izumi Shouted in a panicked voice.

Naruto was just stunned, he stood there unmoving. Then his lips contoured into a grin "Hello nurse" he said in a cheery tone.

Naruto raised the Sword above his head and channeled chakra into it fiercely. The blades moved so fast that the wind began to move about them. A large group of wasps then flew onto the path. Naruto swung the sword, the wind flew from it slashing through the field of wasps spraying the others with their comrades blood. Naruto swung again and again, destroying large number of wasps before they even attacked. Then the large buzzing was heard again.

A large gargantuan Wasp lowered itself into the horde swinging back and forth. Naruto tried cutting it with the wind but found that it would only scratch some type of natural armor. Naruto kept holding the attackers at bay, slicing through each and everyone of them with ease until only the queen was left. The queen reared back and Naruto's eye's widened in fear, she was preparing to attack. He raised the sword above his head and channeled every bit of chakra he could spare. He gradually moved it up the blade to the top star. It extended from the rest of the sword and began spinning. The wind began to move around it, and soon the energy moved into the wind. The star began to glow violently and when it did the wasp queen attacked. It raced forward, but Naruto stood firm and kept charging. The glow began to expand out ward and when it did Naruto took a long breathe and swung. The star separated from the rest of the sword and flew at the queen who did nothing to dodge. The glowing wind and star cleaved the queen in to two pieces.

Naruto dropped to the wooden carts bed and panted heavily. That last attack took almost everything we had. Izumi looked back and smiled sheepishly "Well it seems we're safe now, we'll be in the city by sundown and then we'll go see the queen" Izumi said.

Naruto grinned "Your not getting out of out deal"

"SHIT"

**Short and long awaited I know…. But I hit some writers block about this story…and the next, basically every thing from here on so updates… don't expect many.**

**However, if you feel up to the challenge, you can take this fan fiction off my hands. I'm not quitting but if you think you can do a better job then go ahead.**


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